jumanji is a series of jungle emergencies.

real yearners miss shit that never even happened

Shoutout to Project Hail Mary for being the only media where the unconscious protagonist is dragged off screen by an alien spider monster and the audience's reaction is heartbreak on behalf of the alien spider monster.

Nausea is the only true marker of horniness boner can be anything

deciding one day that you want to build a life for yourself is so scary. like damn I really want to live… I’m new to this. where do I even begin

If Project Hail Mary taught us anything it's that forced romance subplots have ruined movies. Too many stories about guys sacrificing themselves to save girls and not enough movies about guys sacrificing themselves to save their cool rock alien friend.