Take her to the moon for me, ok?

I think my parents consider me to be a god. Because they always ask me ridiculous questions that I don’t have the answer to.

i go absolutely ape shit buck wild when people ask me if i want to run errands with them like Let’s Fucking Go. and my mind absolutely maxes out of dopamine when they ask if i wanna stop for coffee. and if someone took me to the park id go bonkers in funcking yonkers

i got so high last night that i started ghostwriting for a golden retriever apparently

I don’t want to date. I just want to magically end up in a long-term and emotionally-secure relationship with someone cute

petition for stars in the day time please???

girls already exist

Can’t take that chance

Couldn’t risk it.

didn’t realize they change colors. now I know o gotta wish.

THIS SHIT IS REAL I GOT THE JOB I WAS NUTS ABOUT BC I REBLOGGED THIS YESTERDAY maybe it’s a coinkidink but it okay just take the necessary steps to achieve what you’re wishing for and YOU CAN DO IT

This is a KIDS show?!?

It’s sad that this is literally a representation of my life

New Year’s Eve 2017 will be the only day when every adult was born in the 1900’s, and every minor was born in the 2000’s.

Today is National Stress Awareness Day!!! So just to let you all know I have been extremely stressed since 2001

Sometimes I zone out so much while driving that when I drive through an intersection, I question whether or not the light was green or not.