♡

The trip was just the first of many times you hung out with Namjoon and his friends.

By the time of the big party at Seo-joon’s, you already felt like his friends were your friends. Una and you sometimes hung out alone and went shopping and eating together, with her saying she needed some time away from all that testosterone. You understood her completely: while the guys were extremely nice and sweet, you couldn’t imagine being around them 24/7 and not having any female company.

So, you told Una to let you know whenever she needed some female company, and she did. You even introduced her to Olivia, who of course charmed Una as well, so Una became a real friend in your book, someone you can invite to come hang out with you whenever.

When you went to the gym, you often agreed to go with Jungkook and/or Hoseok. Usually, you’d go alone, but having company felt cool when the two of them could actually show you something new without making it sexual, unlike the majority of men in the gym who thought all women were simply waiting for their invaluable input. Going there with the two of them actually made the whole experience a lot more entertaining and useful for you.

You’d run into Yoongi at the coffee place near the university, and instead of you both drinking your coffees alone, you’d sit together and talk for a while. You weren’t exactly the closest people out there, but you got along well and could talk about different topics.

So, you could say that you got to know everyone in Namjoon’s circle a lot better during those couple of weeks.

Well, everyone except Namjoon.

In fact, that wasn’t exactly true. You did get to spend time with him, hang out with him in groups, but the only place where you two went together alone was the lake, where you spent most of the time studying, which didn’t exactly help bring you closer together.

You didn’t blame Namjoon, not at all. He was taking double courses, he had a job, and he had a friend group he loved. So, he couldn’t exactly always find time to spend with you, which is why the time at the lake meant a lot.

Despite all those commitments, Namjoon found time for you two to study together and spend some time alone. You being picky about what kind of time you got to share was a bit too much, so you didn’t express those feelings to him and took whatever he could offer at the time. It felt like you were at a turning point in life and you had to learn how to compromise and put your needs second. Usually, if you were seeing someone, you’d want to spend as much time with them as you could, but more importantly, you were used to them being at your beck and call. Even Jimin would show up whenever you called him over, even if he had other plans.

That didn’t happen with Namjoon and you could either accept it or move on, which wasn’t an option at all. You were too interested to give up so early in over something you can work on accepting.

However, all of this meant that your thing—whatever it was—wasn’t exactly progressing, at least not in the way you were used to, and it was slowly starting to get to you. Namjoon and you didn’t even kiss after that hangout at Jungkook’s. The only physical progress you’ve made was that you now hugged whenever you saw each other. And you kissed his cheek once when he walked you home from the lake, even though it meant he had to walk another half-an-hour to his place. You had that conversation with Namjoon, but after that, neither one of you mentioned intimacy in any way.

Now, you weren’t some sex-obsessed freak, not at all. You enjoyed that type of closeness, clearly, but it wasn’t something that would make or break your relationship with someone. This, however, was completely different than anything you’d experienced. It was sweet, naive almost, so far off from what you’ve been through.

The point was, there was no close contact, no sex, no touching, yet you sometimes found yourself shivering when Namjoon’s hand would brush against yours or when he’d laugh at your jokes or when you’d catch him smiling at you. It was weird that stuff like that could get you to feel so into him, but it did, and that confused you.

That was what was plaguing your mind at Seo-joon’s. The party was the biggest one that year. Everyone was going to be there, including Namjoon and his friends, and you were extremely excited about it. Because of work and studying, Namjoon didn’t really have the time to go out. You went out here and there and saw some or all of his friends, but never him, so tonight was exciting especially because he’d be there too.

“I knew dating a virgin would be an issue,” Olivia shook her head after you told her what was on your mind. She did that while pouring you another shot of the cherry liquor you took from the kitchen and carried out to the garden. It was still early on and not many people arrived, so you could have some privacy with her.

You were already a bit tipsy and you needed to talk to her about Namjoon. This topic was not something you could really discuss with any of his friends, not even Una. It was personal, but you wanted to hear someone else’s opinion on it and if anyone had experience, it was Olivia. Besides, she knew you the best, and that was something other people couldn’t really offer when giving advice.

“It’s not an issue per se,” you sighed, kind of regretting that you’ve brought up this topic again and that you were met with the same response. “I shouldn’t have said anything.”

“No, you should tell me about it,” Olivia reassured you and handed you the shot, so you both downed your drinks before she continued. “It’s just that I knew things like this would pop up along the way. It was inevitable. I don’t mean anything bad by that.”

“Well, you don’t really have to be a genius to figure it out,” you scoffed, feeling frustrated with yourself most of all.

The fact that Namjoon was a virgin wasn’t a problem at all—it was the fact that he didn’t act interested in you sexually. Maybe he wasn’t interested in sex in general, which was completely fine, but still a thing you needed to know because it would probably affect your friendship/relationship/something in between. You were a sexual person, after all.

“Okay, okay. I get it. I’m just saying, it’s a lot harder than dating someone who knows what they want,” Olivia gave her two cents and she was making sense, you had to give her that. “It’s easier to make someone’s wishes come true if you know what they are, and all that. I mean, if it was someone who’s already had sex, we wouldn’t be having this issue because he’d know how to show you what he wanted.”

“What if he doesn’t even want it though?” You asked the thing that was worrying you for a while now, ever since you’ve realized Namjoon hadn’t even kissed you.

Maybe he was just no longer that into you now that he got to know you better, like many guys before. It happened a lot, especially when you were younger—people had this idea of you as the golden girl, the popular cheerleader, and when they got to know you, they realized your life was just as normal as theirs and that nothing was like in the movies, so they left. Namjoon didn’t seem like one of those people, but he also didn’t seem that interested in anything more than friendship with you.

Olivia shot you the coldest glare in the world when you insinuated that. “Oh, come on! What kind of a self-pity party is this? How in the hell did you conclude he doesn’t want you? Enlighten me, please, because I’m starting to think you’re going crazy.”

“I didn’t conclude it,” you shrugged, realizing this whole thing sounded idiotic and that most other people didn’t have these types of problems. But then again, most other people simply fucked around and had fleeting relationships, and that wasn’t something you wanted for yourself again, not anymore at least. “It’s just that he’s never making any moves.”

“Because he’s the shiest person alive, duh,” Olivia looked at you like you were crazy, again. “He’s a shy dude, of course he’s not going to be the first one to make a move. Did you when you were in his shoes!?”

“Okay, but… We’re kind of getting closer. It’s not like I’m just some random person.”

“Listen, he’s new to this. Is he my favorite dude you’ve dated? Not really because I never talk to him. But, I can see that you’re happy. Well, not right now, but you are, usually,” Olivia said with a grin. “You have a good time with him and he treats you the way you like to be treated, which is amazing. If you’re happy, so am I. The way I see it, you have two options. Well, three. Either initiate it yourself, wait for him to do it, or just break it off. You won’t do the last one, I know, so it’s one of the two.”

“That’s true, but I don’t want to pressure him into anything. But I also don’t know if he wants it but is just too scared to make a move,” you kicked your head back with a sigh, wondering how you became so awkward around men. This kind of stuff never happened to you. Someone like you never had a problem with asking what you wanted, and getting it.

“Then you make it,” Olivia suggested, like it was an easy thing to do. Well, usually, it would be, but not when Namjoon was in question. “And no, I don’t mean, get naked and ask him to put it in, that would be crude, even for me. Do something like, I don’t know… Has he ever touched you in any way?”

“Not really,” you admitted, pouring shots for the both of you. You expected Olivia to clown you for even talking about this—you two hadn’t discussed anything like this in years, and here you were, asking her how to make a move on a man. “We’ve… held hands and kissed.”

“Offer a boob,” Olivia giggled, slapping her own gently as a joke.

“Girl, the way you said that made it so unappealing,” you frowned and downed your shot.

“I know, but the point is, let him play. How else is he going to get comfortable with sex stuff? Step by step,” Olivia shrugged. “That’s my advice.”

“Probably the worst advice in the world, if I’m being honest.”

Olivia pretended to look around for someone else. “Do I see anyone else trying to help you out?” She squinted her eyes and pretended to look again. “Oh, no, it’s just me? No shit.”

“I know,” you pulled her in by the waist and hugged her. You knew she was taking this seriously and giving you advice when she could have just told you to grow up. “I’m kidding. You’re a good friend. Do you really think I should do that?”

“Fuck yeah!” Olivia clapped excitedly. “You’re wearing that crop top and no bra, he’ll definitely stare at them. I mean, I am and I’m not even interested in women, so… Ask him how he feels about your boobs. I’m serious. Get the convo going, you know.”

“That sounds so awkward, though,” you grimaced, imagining the scene in your head. “Hey, Namjoon, like boobs? Here’s one, play,” you said, laughing at how ridiculous the idea was. You couldn’t imagine the two of you in that situation. “It doesn’t sound like me.”

“I didn’t say follow my plan to a tee! I’m just giving you a general idea,” Olivia smacked your shoulder playfully. “What I’m saying is, it’s not that huge of a step, but it will surely show you whether he’s interested. I mean, if he’s not, he’ll say no, and I’m telling you, there’s no way that will happen. I’m sure he wants to touch them but is totally scared shitless of making the wrong move,” your best friend gave you a meaningful look. “And don’t think I don’t see him staring at you. I have to say, he doesn’t give me the creepy vibes when he does that, which says a lot about him.”

“Do you see? I told you he’s a nice guy,” you nodded in agreement, happy that she was finally starting to see what you saw in Namjoon.

“He may be nice, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t jerk off to you every night, so I win,” Olivia burst out laughing, and you had to join her, even though Namjoon jerking off to you was the last thing on your mind—you didn’t even believe he thought about you at this point. “But no, seriously, this is new territory for both of you so just go with the flow and start slow.”

Did Olivia give the best advice out there? You couldn’t be objective, not two more shots and a gin-tonic later when Namjoon wrapped his arms around you and you held him tight, even though he was just saying hi. He didn’t seem to mind, though, you could tell as soon as you saw that dimple of his appear when he looked at you.

You kept thinking about your friend’s advice while talking to Namjoon and his friends, always careful to stay close to him so he’d know you came there to spend time with him and not anyone else. Yes, you liked his friends, but Namjoon was the center of your attention.

So, when you asked him to dance, you hoped he wouldn’t shy away. Hoseok and Una were already dancing and laughing loudly, clearly enjoying the party, while Jungkook and Yoongi were too busy discussing the best Marvel superhero and why it wasn’t Captain America.

Surprisingly, Namjoon followed your lead and danced with you in circles while you talked about your week, neither one of you addressing that this was the first time you were dancing and how nice it felt to be in each other’s arms. Well, that’s what you were thinking, at least. Namjoon could have been thinking about anything else, for all you knew.

You tried to keep the conversation going since chit-chat wasn’t exactly his thing, but two songs in, you realized Namjoon’s answers were pretty short. It seemed like his head just wasn’t in it, and you weren’t sure if it was because of you or because he had a long day.

“You seem tired,” you said after a while. By that time, he was starting to move a lot slower than before. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” Namjoon nodded right away as if he was trying hard to convince you. “I had a crazy busy week. I’m sorry we couldn’t hang out that much.”

“Don’t worry about it,” you patted his chest, hoping he knew you didn’t mind. Of course, you would have loved to hang out with him a lot more often, but you got that he had a life and a job and school commitments. Not every guy out there had to be at your beck and call. “It’s nice that you could make it.”

“Well, you asked me to come and I didn’t want to miss it,” Namjoon admitted, pushing his glasses back up his nose as you two stopped moving and just looked at each other.

“That’s cute,” you couldn’t help but say, and it made Namjoon look away sheepishly. “But if you’re too tired, don’t feel like you have to stay because of me. I know you’re busy and exhausted…”

“Maybe I’m a bit too tired to dance, but I’m staying,” Namjoon said with a tone of determinedness in his voice.

An hour later, you two found yourself upstairs, in a room, both drunk. You told each other you could go upstairs to have some privacy and talk because the music wasn’t so loud upstairs, but it was just an excuse, and that part thrilled you. Namjoon was flirting with you, you realized a while ago when you noticed he gave you a couple of compliments and kept smiling at you, maintaining eye contact even when the moment started to feel a bit too private. Of course, the fact that you’d been drinking for an hour straight, just the two of you, also helped his confidence.

So, when you closed the door behind you two, the first thing that came out of your mouth was “do you want to kiss”, and to your excitement, Namjoon quickly nodded, which made you rush over to him and kiss him eagerly, so much so that he had to walk backward until his calves reached the bed.

When that happened, you stopped kissing him, even though he tasted superb, and looked up in his eyes with a grin before pushing him down on the bed. Sure, this wasn’t exactly the way things usually worked with the two of you, but you could tell you were both into each other and Namjoon just needed a little push. Besides, the things Olivia advised were running through your head—take the first step. He’d follow.

Namjoon didn’t seem to mind the sudden burst of dominance from you, as expected. Maybe Olivia was right and he was just waiting for you to initiate something, or maybe you just preferred to think that. Namjoon kissed you back just as eagerly and let out a groan when you started climbing on top of him so you could keep kissing. His hands slowly made their way to your waist, and the fact that he was so close to you, his body warm, was driving you crazy.

“I’m sorry,” you mumbled into the kiss, one hand cupping Namjoon’s cheek. For a second, you wondered if you were coming off too strong. After all, he just said yes to a kiss and you were straddling him on a bed, which wasn’t exactly the same. “I just really wanted to kiss you all night.”

Your confession made Namjoon chuckle and look to the side, his cheeks flushing with color at the compliment. “I-I don’t mind, of course,” he said, shaking his head. “I’ve been wanting that too.”

Now, you weren’t the type of person to get moved by compliments or to take them to heart, but when they came from someone like Namjoon, you greatly appreciated them. “You know you could have just kissed me too,” you told him, leaning in to peck his lips, enjoying the fact that Namjoon smiled into every kiss, no matter how short.

“Ah,” Namjoon scoffed, taking a deep breath, his eyes still focused on your face hovering over his. “You know me.”

You nodded slowly and leaned in, deciding to just kiss the guy without making him feel awkward.

And it worked, for a long time. Each kiss made you get more excited, made you want to touch Namjoon, feel his skin under your palms, feel him, all of him, but things were going slow, and it was something you had to accept.

Besides, feeling this type of lust felt great. Usually, when you’d feel this type of way, you’d just get what you wanted right away, which sometimes took the magic right out of things. Maybe all the yearning had a lot to do with how fascinated you were with Namjoon. He was so unlike anyone you’d ever dated that you just couldn’t stop focusing on him.

“Namjoon, I have a serious question”, you told him, sitting up and taking a deep breath, without giving much thought to the fact that you were practically sitting on his crotch. Once you realized that, things turned tense, at least on your end. It was right there and you would have probably felt it if you rolled your hips against Namjoon’s lap. However, you didn’t do that. “But don’t laugh.”

“Never,” Namjoon cleared his throat and propped himself up on his elbows, staring at you over the rim of his glasses, anticipating your question.

At this point, the drinks had gotten to your head and you felt a bit dizzy but somehow so relaxed and comfortable around Namjoon as if you two were a lot closer than you were just hours before when you were struggling to find the right words.

“What do you think of my boobs?” you asked and the second you realized Olivia’s advice was indeed stupid, you burst with laughter, which made Namjoon laugh too.

However, you could tell Namjoon was uncomfortable with the question. In fact, it seemed like he wasn’t sure if you were serious about it in the first place. To be honest, you’d never asked him anything like that before and you two hadn’t touched on similar topics, so the fact that you wanted to know something that straightforward probably raised an alarm.

“I’m sorry,” you shook your head at him, feeling like a total fool for running the moment with such an idiotic, invasive question. “I mean, it’s a serious question, it just sounds so stupid when I say it out loud.”

“Are you drunk?” Namjoon cocked an eyebrow up and looked a bit relieved when you shook your head as a no. Well, alcohol clearly helped start this conversation, but it was something you were thinking about bringing up anyway.

“Maybe a teeny tiny bit,” you admitted with a grin. “But I know what I’m doing. And saying.”

“Good,” Namjoon smiled, shifting his weight to one elbow so he could use the other hand to push his glasses up his nose, giving away his nervousness. “Good to know.”

“So, what do you think?” you asked again, this time putting a bit more confidence into your words.

Namjoon wasn’t expecting the question again, you could tell by the way his mouth dropped open in slight surprise and how he suddenly had trouble looking straight into your eyes again, even though he’d been doing so well.

“I, uh, ah…” Namjoon cleared his throat and took a deep breath. Then, he opened his mouth to say something but quickly shook his head and looked away. “I think… T-they’re, uh, they’re just...”

Seeing him struggle like that upset you but you also knew you shouldn’t stop him from saying what he wanted to say, even if it did take some time. Namjoon gulped loudly and looked down from your face to your chest before quickly looking away, clearly unsure of whether it was okay for him to take a look. “They’re uh, just… Great. Why?”

You knew it took a lot for Namjoon to get that sentence out, so you giggled and replied to his question immediately, not wanting to prolong his torture. “You never look at them or try to touch them or anything, so I was wondering.”

“I… I should?” Namjoon looked up at you in surprise, pushing his glasses up his nose. The fact that he was so surprised that you wanted him to look at your body would be comical if it wasn’t so sweet. His innocence and the complete respect he showed you under any circumstances were making your chest warm. “I didn’t… Want to… Offend or anything. I mean, you know, just, yeah. I don’t know if commenting is… Appropriate, let alone touching.”

Namjoon’s voice quivered when he said the word, and it seemed like he really wanted to touch you right then. Did he think about it as often as you did? The thought thrilled you. You didn’t want to push him into anything but even hearing that he thought about it did something to you, which was strange considering you’d never taken things that slow with anyone before.

“But you want to?” you asked, unsure of whether you were crossing the line or not. Hearing your voice sound weak surprised the both of you but you didn’t want to show it.

Namjoon chuckled before letting out a loud sigh, clearly realizing he had no way out other than to be honest and say it. “Yes.”

“Touch it?” you suggested with raised eyebrows, wanting to make sure you were thinking about the same thing. If you weren’t, it could get really uncomfortable really fast.

Namjoon slowly nodded before blinking a couple of times, his nerves getting the better of him as he struggled to keep eye contact with you after this admission. If he knew how it made you feel, he would never be ashamed of it.

Once again, you knew it took a lot for Namjoon to admit something like that to your face, so you decided to help him out and show him you were thinking the same thing. Instead of saying anything back, you pulled down the crop top and let it pool around your waist, which earned a loud hiss from him.

Your action allowed Namjoon to get a clear look at your naked chest. Despite that, Namjoon was still looking right at your eyes, which made you raise both eyebrows at him. This action made Namjoon look down for a second before uttering a quick “wow” and looking up at you again.

You were now half-naked and sitting on top of him. As if that wasn’t a turn-on in itself, you noticed that Namjoon’s eyes widened at the sight of your chest, and that realization made you shiver. You wouldn’t say you were nervous, but you were burning up with anticipation. Namjoon looked down again, his mouth slightly agape, so you decided to go a step further and pull him in closer until he was sitting up too.

Then, you leaned in and kissed him again, gently, wrapping your arms around his shoulders, pulling him in closer, allowing his tongue to enter your mouth, taking all of him in. Namjoon’s hands hovered over your back and you had a feeling he didn’t want to cross the line and touch your naked back, so you asked him to do so. “Touch me. It’s okay…”

Namjoon sighed and let his palms find your waist. The second he touched you, shivers ran down your spine—his hands were big and soft and exactly what you needed to feel. Then, he slowly dragged his hands up and down your back, careful to do it gently, and his gentleness made you arch your back. His hands were warm, but you still shivered at his touch.

Namjoon shifted as if he was uncomfortable, but you quickly realized he was doing that because of the way you rubbed against him when arching your back. You could feel him growing under you, and you were both aware of it. You took it as a compliment and actually liked the feeling while Namjoon seemed mortified.

“Don’t worry about anything,” you whispered into the kiss and leaned in to deepen it, but his glasses were in the way.

Surprisingly, Namjoon reached up to get them off his face in a haste, as if he was forgetting all about feeling ashamed, and you liked the change in behavior. Now that the glasses were gone, you could lean in properly and move your head when you kissed, teasing him with your tongue, feeling him shiver under you.

Your hands cupped his cheeks as you moved in, kissing him, tongue poking out to lick his lips, teasing him before you moved your head to the other side and kissed him again, getting to taste him this time, tongues rubbing against one another.

“You can touch me,” you said, your lips brushing against his now that you were talking, unable to move away from him. That simple movement somehow managed to turn you on, and you enjoyed the thought that Namjoon could get you to feel that way with a simple kiss. Not a lot of guys could. “Wherever you want.”

Was it straightforward? Of course, but it was also needed. Namjoon wasn’t the type of guy who’d touch you without asking first, and getting him to ask was impossible—he spent way too much time in his head, worrying about every single possible outcome, about whether you wanted this or not, conflicted on whether it’s too early in your friendship to try something like that. Namjoon didn’t tell you any of this, but he didn’t have to—his gaze gave it all away.

“Uh, hm,” Namjoon cleared his throat quickly, his breathing quickly getting more audible as he pecked your lips. “Okay.”

Since he said that but didn’t do a thing about it, you realized you were going to have to initiate and let him know it was okay. If just saying it wasn’t enough, maybe showing him would do—so, you grabbed both his hands and placed them on your naked breasts, instantly feeling warmer as his soft hands covered your chest. “Is this okay?”

Namjoon scoffed and, at first, you weren’t sure what the scoff was supposed to mean. For a second, you got scared that you overdid it, that you pushed too much, skipped a step or two in this whole thing, didn’t do things at his pace. But then, you saw him slowly dare to look down at his own big hands on your breasts, nipples covered by his palms, which meant he surely felt how hard they were.

“It’s… It’s wonderful. Amazing,” he whispered the words before daring to give your tits a light squeeze. After a loud gulp, Namjoon muttered, “Fuck.”

Since it was fairly obvious he was nervous and couldn’t completely relax, even though you’ve given him the green light, you decided to encourage him a bit. “Hmmm,” you hummed in approval, “thanks.”

This made Namjoon smile and look down again, so you did the same, loving the way he was staring at your chest, touching you, and appreciating every second of it. He looked so adorable watching you, chewing on his bottom lip, getting lost in the moment, even though this wasn’t a situation in which you were supposed to think that he was cute. Still, you did and you couldn’t help but rub his cheek gently and enjoy the sight of him looking mesmerized as he touched you. It was so cute and innocent, and that played a part in turning you on even more.

Usually, guys would give your tits a squeeze or two, suck on them for a while, pinch a nipple here and there, but that was about it. Nobody wanted to waste time playing when they could just go straight to the main prize. However, Namjoon was completely different and he showed it to you once again as he took his time with this action alone, squeezing your chest here and there, even though his entire body, including his hands, was stiff.

“It feels so nice,” you told him, getting the corners of his mouth to turn upwards in a cute little smile that warmed you instantly.

Since Namjoon hummed happily, you leaned in for a kiss and you stayed like that for a while, keen on getting him to relax. Even though he was enjoying the view, it didn’t change the fact that he was tense, and you wanted him to relax fully. There was nothing to worry about, he couldn’t do anything wrong here, but he didn’t seem to get that. As the kiss continued, Namjoon squeezed your breasts here and there, lowly moaning and grunting into your mouth, slowly getting more comfortable around you.

Then, he moved one of his hands to the side. A second later, you felt his thumb rubbing your hardened nipple, and you broke the kiss for the first time in at least a couple of minutes to let out a moan. “Fuck…”

The funny thing is, you’ve had men touch your breasts before, clearly, but it never felt this good. Before, they were just a stop between your mouth and your crotch, where most of the fun happened. The guys didn’t pay that much attention to your breasts and neither did you—you wouldn’t get that much pleasure from them. Now that you knew that was all you were going to get, you appreciated Namjoon’s touch a lot more since he was so gentle, careful, sweet with the way he touched you, and it just made you want him to never stop.

You looked down at his hand, carefully inspecting every single move of his. The thumb was now circling your nipple once, twice, three times, before he grabbed your breast with his hand and squeezed it with a grunt. You weren’t sure what you enjoyed more—his grunts or the way his slender fingers dug into your flesh. Namjoon then started to pay attention to the other breast, giving your nipples the same treatment at the same time, which instantly made you arch your back.

“Is that okay?” he asked, staring at your chest, his eyes quickly moving from one nipple to the other.

You hummed in response, cupping his cheeks again. “Kiss me,” you asked, and it didn’t take him long to lift his head and lean in to kiss you, this time shoving his tongue inside your mouth, which was progress in your book.

The kiss slowly got more heated, encouraged by the way Namjoon touched you and pinched your nipples before squeezing your breasts, switching between the two and the way you bucked your hips into him. He was driving you wild by barely touching you, and it was something you’ve never experienced before.

Somehow, as you two kissed, Namjoon relaxed more and let his hand travel down to your ass slowly, excruciatingly so, while the other one played with your breast, pinching the nipple gently, feeling it under his fingertips. He lowered his hand on your ass, giving it a light squeeze before spreading his fingers and grazing them against the light material that covered your skin.

Before getting the chance to think about it properly and decide whether it was the smartest thing to do, you reached down and pulled the dress up, gently lifting your hips so the dress would ride up to your waist, exposing your underwear to him.

“Fuck,” Namjoon grunted as he looked down at your crotch. It was covered with enough material, but he still didn’t seem able to take his mind off your hips and the body part he clearly wanted to see badly. “God.”

When you pulled the skirt up, Namjoon moved his hand away to get out of your way, so you now returned it to its earlier position. However, this time there wasn’t a cotton barrier between Namjoon’s hand and your skin, which got him to grunt as soon as his palm met the supple flesh of your ass. To encourage him, you leaned in and wrapped both hands around his neck, kissing him once again, searching for his tongue with your own.

This seemed to work well as Namjoon’s other hand flew down to your other ass cheek and he held them in his hands, gently patting, squeezing, caressing. You were wet. You felt a weird kind of tingling around your entrance, the type that could only mean you were dripping and aching to feel something, and you felt ridiculous. The guy’s just touched your tits and ass, and you were practically creaming already, but you knew it had a lot more to do with your feelings for him and his reactions to your body than the actual actions taking place.

Every couple of seconds, Namjoon would shudder or breathe in loudly or gulp or hiss or do something so small that would still turn you on—he appreciated every single touch of yours, whether it was something like dragging your fingers over the column of his neck, tugging at the hair on the base of his skull, teasing his scalp with your fingers, caressing his cheeks, or bucking your hips into his slightly.

“Is this okay?” you couldn’t help but ask, wanting to be sure you weren’t forcing anything on Namjoon. He had a right to stop this whenever he felt uncomfortable, even if he was enjoying himself.

“Perfect,” he mumbled, kissing his way down your neck, which got you to arch your back. He was a good kisser—a great one, actually—the type to get you wet just by the way he took his time, wet lips meeting yours before his tongue prodded between his lips and gently teased, leaving a wet trail. He did the same to your neck then on his way down and all you could do was look down and hold onto his hair and shoulder, getting turned on by the way he was kissing you and how close he was getting to your tits.

He took his sweet time, as always. It felt like it took Namjoon ten minutes to finally reach your nipple and suck it into his mouth. As soon as he did that, you moaned loudly and your hips bucked again. This time, your movements made your crotch brush against his erection, and that made Namjoon grunt against your skin. He breathed out loudly as if he was trying to calm himself, but his warm breath on the nipple he’d just thoroughly wetted just made you move and groan more.

“Fuck, Namjoon, fuck,” you moaned, unable to control yourself. At that point, your entire body was buzzing in anticipation of his next move, goosebumps all over, body on fire, pussy drenched.

You were sure your underwear was soaked and that you’d come so fast later when you masturbated, which you’d surely have to do after that encounter. The fact that you two were so close and all you could feel is Namjoon’s warm, comforting scent was incentive enough to get yourself off later. His hands on your ass, moving dangerously close to your hole, and his mouth on your nipples were just a plus.

“Oh my God,” you groaned again, this time because he was moving his hands up and down your ass, careful when he was moving downward as his fingers got close to your crotch.

Namjoon stopped himself in time every time, but he inched in closer each time as if he was testing the waters and trying to figure out whether it was okay for him to touch you there like you weren’t practically begging him to finger you.

And then, finally, his fingers met at your crotch, the wet cotton material letting Namjoon know just how much you enjoyed his touch, the contact with it making him hiss and you groan. Instinctively, you bucked your hip into his hands, which made him realize you were fine with being touched. “God, right there,” you mumbled and tugged at his hair when his fingers found your clit.

“You’re so hot.” Even though the words were practically whispered into the skin of your breast, you heard them loud and clear, and they made your chest fill with pride, your pussy clenching around nothing.

With a quick move of your hips, you responded, “You turn me on so much, you have no idea, Namjoon.”

This seemed to be enough to light some sort of a spark in him, one that made him move one hand to your front and cup your crotch—the bottom of his palm pressed into your clit, his fingers caressing your entrance, all over your underwear. You weren’t sure where Namjoon saw that or why it felt as good as it did, but you couldn’t even get yourself to ask. Instead, you pushed your hips down into his hand and moaned, kicking your head back. “Right there,” you instructed, hoping that would help him relax.

Namjoon looked up at you, his mouth wrapped around your nipple, and started moving the hand up and down your crotch, keeping it pressed against you. This caused friction all over your mound, especially your clit, and you couldn’t refrain from moaning. “Namjoon, fuck! Wha—ah, God…” You couldn’t even speak properly anymore, which was so embarrassing. That only happened to you while you were in the middle of a rough sex session or when someone was fucking you silly, not when a guy was just touching you over clothes.

The fact that you were keeping eye contact and the usually nervous Namjoon had a slight smirk on his face just made you start moving your hips faster, rutting against his hand in a desperate attempt to get off. You weren’t sure what had gotten into you—you never acted that needy around Namjoon, of all people. Taking things at his pace was the way to go, but you just couldn’t help yourself, not when he looked at you like that. His eyebrows were raised as you two kept eye contact, both getting even more aroused by doing that.

With each moan that left your mouth, Namjoon rubbed you harder, his other hand squeezing your ass so hard you thought it would bruise, fingers sinking into the flesh of your ass. Had Namjoon smacked your ass cheek even once, you would have come on the spot, you were 100% certain. But, he didn’t feel that comfortable yet, so he kept squeezing and caressing, alternating between the two while getting you off. “Good?”

“Perfect,” you breathed, hands digging into his shoulder. “I’m close.”

You weren’t sure if that’s something you should have told him if that’s something he was trying to do here, but his eyes instantly widened, bottom lip bitten as a grunt left his mouth “Just… Keep g-going like this?” Namjoon sounded uncertain for a second.

“Yes, yes, please,” you dragged the word into a moan, unable to stop, not when he was rubbing your clit just right, applying the right amount of pressure without making it too sensitive, fingers teasing your entrance. “Just like that, Namjoon, you’re doing great.”

“Really?” The word left him before he could think about it, you realized when he looked away. That may have been Namjoon’s first time doing something like that, which meant it was your job to make him feel good about it and reassure him. If he was doing a bad job, you would have told him—why lie and hinder someone’s progress? But he really wasn’t.

The thing was, you’d much rather have him throw you on your back and fuck you senseless. Just the idea could make you come—seeing the usually shy and composed Namjoon fucking in and out of you roughly, cock hard for you, leaking precum as he hit your walls over and over again, not stopping even when you cry out for him… You’d thought about that way too much.

“Can’t you feel how wet I am?” you moaned the words at him, leaning in to kiss him again, mumbling into the kiss, “Feel it if you want to.”

This time, telling him was enough. You didn’t have to show anything to Namjoon for him to move his hand away and quickly sneak it into your underwear, assuming the same position as earlier and continuing to rub you right away, clearly not wanting to lose momentum.

“Oh, wow,” he groaned, eyes widening as he touched more. Soon enough, the room was filled with wet, sloppy noises as your juices collected over his long fingers and palm. “You are.”

“For you,” you grinned. “So fucking good.”

“Oh my god,” Namjoon mumbled and used the other hand to keep your hips in place, stopping you from moving, while his other hand started rubbing ferociously, applying a lot more pressure than earlier, making you moan with every quick exhale, his finger pressed against your entrance, but so far away from your walls, where you needed him.

Still, the bottom of his palm was creating more than enough pressure against your clit, especially now that it was wet, and in no more than a minute, Namjoon got you to come. When you felt it approaching, you stopped kissing him and moved away slightly, enough to look into his eyes, fingers digging into his shoulders as your thighs shook, stomach twitched, a ball of flaming pleasure exploding inside you, spreading it like wildfire all over you.

“Namjoon, fuck, I’m co—ah! Fuck, coming,” you barely got the words out before your orgasm washed over you.

When your moans got higher and your face started frowning, Namjoon’s eyes widened and he let out a moan too, his hand still moving fast. It continued moving while you rode it out and stopped only when you wrapped both hands around his wrist and pulled it away, overstimulation getting a bit too much for you, even though you were a fan. “Wow,” was all you could breathe out and Namjoon softly sighed with a light chuckle, looking to the side. “My turn?”

“You? Your— Uh…” The look on Namjoon’s face could be compared to that of a deer caught in the headlights, as evidenced by him loudly swallowing. “You don’t have to… Do anything.”

“I know,” you whispered as you patted his shoulders. “But I want to. If you do, of course.”

“I, I, yes, sure,” Namjoon nodded more than a couple of times, looking around, chest moving up and down as he breathed loudly.

So, you reached in and grabbed his shirt, starting to pull it over his head, which he accepted. A second later, he was in front of you shirtless, and to say you gawked at the man would be an understatement. You knew he worked out from time to time when he found the time in his busy schedule. You, however, didn’t know he looked like that when shirtless, clearly defined pecs, chiseled torso, nothing too much, everything just right.

“You really don’t know how attractive you are,” you informed Namjoon as you pushed him down on the bed and got on all fours over him, kissing him. “It’s a shame. Maybe I can change your mind about it just a little.”

Namjoon moaned into the kiss. “You’re… Doing a great job.”

“Good,” you said, giving him a final peck before starting to kiss your way down.

You were going slow on purpose, so slow you were teasing yourself at that point, but his skin tasted great—salty, manly somehow—and you spent way too much time licking and sucking his neck. You only stopped when you noticed that a slight red mark was forming, one you two didn’t discuss. When mentioning it to Namjoon, he shook it off, “It doesn’t matter, really.”

After that, you moved down, dragging your lips across his chest, teasing each nipple with the tip of your tongue. Some guys didn’t feel a thing when it came to nipples, others hated the feeling, and some enjoyed it. Namjoon seemed to be one of those guys who got excited about any kind of touch, which was normal for someone who hasn’t really been touched before, which is what made the whole thing better for you—whatever type of touches and kisses you chose, Namjoon would reward them with a slight grunt.

When you wrapped your lips around his nipples, he let out such a low, raspy grunt that you instantly lowered your hand over his crotch and started palming him over his jeans. God, he felt big and ready for you, and you imagined pulling his clothes down just enough to pull his cock out and sit on it. Still, you weren’t there yet, so you just palmed him, roughly grabbing the erection over his jeans, half-wrapping your fingers around his cockhead, and pulling on the skin while you kissed your way down his stomach.

The second your mouth kissed the spot under his ribs, Namjoon’s stomach clenched, so you took your sweet time, moving from side to side with your kisses, looking up at him just to find Namjoon staring at you, teeth sunk into his bottom lip as he intently watched your every move.

By the time you reached the hem of his jeans, he was breathing heavily, cock twitching under your palm, hips bucking into you, a wet trail of saliva down his entire torso, skin on fire because of your kisses. “You make me so hard,” he said through clenched teeth and you realized he was really enjoying this a lot more than you thought he would—you weren’t touching him yet.

“Good,” you said as you looked up into his eyes again, palm still working his cock. “I want to see just how hard you can get for me, Namjoon… You feel really big like this, hard… You’d fit right in.”

“Oh, fuck, no, no,n—ah, fuck!” Namjoon was grunting and twisting under your touch and you realized he was coming even though he wasn’t planning on doing it, not just yet, not when you were so close to his cock, a couple of seconds away from taking it into your hand or mouth, whichever one he chose.

Shame washed over him instantly as he threw his head down on the bed and grunted, covering his face with both hands and swearing to himself. Okay, it was embarrassing for him, but that was it. None of it was shameful in your eyes, and you knew it was completely normal, especially if it was his first time being touched in any way. You didn’t exactly know that, but you guessed he was just turned on by everything that had happened—you went from barely kissing each other to him getting you off, feeling you up, sucking on your tits, and you palming him over his clothes. It was a big jump, and you didn’t blame Namjoon for blowing his load too early.

Instead of addressing it, you continued to palm him gently, enjoying watching the small wet spot spread, but you realized it might be mortifying for him, especially since you had to leave the room eventually. So, you pecked his stomach and got up to get some tissue from the bathroom.

“I’ll be right back,” you mumbled and made your way there. Getting him clean was a lot more important than your sick desire to watch the cum stain spread over his crotch, to see what you did to him.

When you got back, paper bunched in your hand, you found Namjoon in the same spot, face covered so you walked over and sat next to him. With a sigh, you gently pulled one of his hands away and leaned in to kiss him, taking the time to do it properly, without tongue. “If you’re ashamed, don’t be,” you told him as you moved away. “Let’s clean up before it stains your jeans.”

Namjoon sat up with a gulp the second he registered your words, realizing he’d have to walk around with a wet spot on his crotch if he didn’t act fast so he did so without a word, and you looked away, not wanting to pry. When he was done, Namjoon sighed loudly. “It’s… I am ashamed, clearly. I can’t believe I blew it.”

You couldn’t help but laugh, so you hugged him from the back right away, not wanting Namjoon to think you were laughing at him. “I thought it was kind of hot,” you said before pecking his back. “And we can do it differently next time… Maybe less teasing for you.”

He stiffened at your words, swallowing a lump in his throat. “So I didn’t completely blow it?”

“By coming?” you breathed before scoffing. “Namjoon, I did too. It’s… Normal.”

Even though you tried to be as reassuring as possible and give him as many kisses as possible without seeming too clingy, you didn’t feel like you’d done a good job. Soon enough, Namjoon said he should go find his friends and that you can come with him, but you had a feeling he just wanted to run away from the situation. He was the type of person who needed time away to think, and you wanted to give him that.

So, before he left the room, you hugged Namjoon tightly and kissed him once again, this time slowly without any tongue. “Thanks for tonight.”

“Thank you.” He quickly looked away right after saying that, probably remembering what had just happened.

“Can I tell you something embarrassing?” you whispered, instantly getting his attention. “Since you seem ashamed, maybe this will make you feel better.”

“S-sure,” he nodded and waited for you to speak.

“I thought you weren’t, uhm, into me at all. I mean, attracted to me, sexually,” you admitted, feeling a bit ashamed of your own thoughts now, after everything. “So, I guess tonight just proved to me that we’re both attracted to each other equally.”

“Hm,” Namjoon hummed with a nod, hands still wrapped around you, fingers gently caressing your back now. “That does make me feel a bit better. But you know that I, uh, I am, right?”

“Yes,” you responded right away, no longer doubting yourself or this thing of yours at all. YOu were both attracted to one another. He was a guy who could make you come easily, get you all wet and messy by kissing you, and you could make him come by touching him over his clothes. It was… Sweet? Hot? Innocent? All of it, probably. “And do you”?

Namjoon hesitated for a while, eyes giving off the fact that he was scared of believing it. “I… I hope so.”

“I do,” you sighed, leaning in to peck him before continuing, “There’s no hoping. I am telling you I am very attracted to you. Earlier, my head was spinning just because I felt your skin on mine. Maybe I should tell you this when we’re not drinking, but I guess I’m not as confident as I like to believe, either. But I will tell you tomorrow if that will make you trust me.”