Weāre getting close to the end of pride month and I feel like I didnāt do anything gay enough

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Weāre getting close to the end of pride month and I feel like I didnāt do anything gay enough

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Just saw someone with a WH84M3 license plate (wait for me) I canāt tell if this is a theatre nerd or a slow driver who is warning people behind them.
Rewatching videos of someone playing The Walking Dead Telltale games. Itās like seeing an old friend.
Next to normal fan...
Perhapsā¦
Iām currently alone at a house with an island. The urge is so strong.

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Youāll never guess what I just listened to for the first time. The gender envy urge to dress up as this Shakespeare for Halloween is so strong, maybe Iāll need to do it earlier, Shakespeareās birthday (and deathday š¬) is coming up šš¤.
The whole musical was good btw.
Drank a Celsius at 10pm now Iām watching The Prom on the projector my roommateās ex-situationship left at our house.
Should I Double Major in Creative Writing?
Yes!
No!
Maybeā¦š¤
Maybe itās just because we were watching it at 3 am but like Yo Gabba Gabba has a weird amount in common with Severance? They are just dolls until the magic words are uttered and they just go back into the box until the next episode and the set is all white except for their monochromatic areas.
Every time I listen to Falsettos I find something new to appreciate. Today it is Mendel and Jason in Everyone Hates His Parents, Brandon Uranowitzās physical comedy in the pro-shot, and the fact that the musical ends with a Bar Mitzvah as all the male characters finally complete their developmental arcs (Marvin caring for others and accepting/loving them as they are, Whizzer accepting the love offered to him, Jason growing into his own man without the mistakes of the past(I just love that he let Whizzer win whereas Marvin had to learn to do it), Mendel acknowledging he doesnāt have all the answers and he needs to actually be there instead of just saying everything will be all right).

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I just watched Falsettos. I listened to the musical and then watched the proshotā¦my heart has not been this thoroughly broken in a long time. Itās great; like an emotional laxative. I have listened to it repeatedly and I am going to make my friend watch the pro-shot. And then after heās recovered Iām gonna make him watch the N2N proshot š
Jasonās Bar Mitzvah never fails to make me cry which never bodes well considering What Would I Do? is right after, but what am I supposed to do when Trina and the ladies keep singing āI feel more helpless than I have in yearsā or āsoothes that āsomething, somethingā someone needed soothingā and everyone says ādonāt know why, but he looks like Marvinā. Iām a mess by the final abba.
Trina may be my favorite female character in a musical like ever, sheās so complicated her development her āhe shared my lifeā and her āso many moreā she grew to love so many more people than what was considered āfamilyā back then. Growing beyond the bounds of what society deemed acceptable as a family is the best trope (found family with extra steps).
The Foreshadowing!!!! Musicals with good foreshadowing and parallels are my favorite thing so this was just the best type of soul crusher.
The final falsetto my heart! š
Iām currently suffering through the curse of not singing the songs every time my friends say a word that is in the songs. The voices! š«©
My favorite songs:
Days Like This
Making a Home, The Games I Play, Marvin Hits Trina and how that turns into I Never Wanted To Love You. To me they all go together because how can you listen to one without immediately listening to the other (and while your at it just listen to the whole second act)
Unlikely Lovers
What Would I Do?
Jasonās Bar Mitzvah
A Day in Falsetto Land
The Baseball Game
Holding to the Ground
You Gotta Die Sometime
Iām Breaking Down
What More Can I Say?
Father to Son
The Thrill of First Love
Four Jews in a Room Bitching
Trinaās Song/March of the Falsettos
A Marriage Proposal/A Tight-Knit Family-Reprise
ā¦I could keep writing and eventually all of the songs would be on here, there arenāt any I donāt love. This musical is amazing š„²
Iām writing this post while I eat a chocolate croissant on the floor and listening to Falsettos trying not to cry bcs Iām in public.
Bridgerton Season 4 Feelings (Spoiler Heavy)
Okay, so Iām posting this like a literal month after the season fully came out (I've been writing it since I watched the finale), even though I watched it the day it came out. I suppose I needed to digest (and rewatch) before giving my opinions.
I give this season a 10/10. It was my absolute favorite season of Bridgerton so far (I donāt think I had a favorite before. I had things I liked about all of themā¦actually, the Queen Charlotte spinoff was absolutely my favorite before), even if things didnāt necessarily go how I wanted/expected in all regards. I made a previous post about my theories and hopes for S4, and Iām very happy some of them came true, but I also have so many things that actually happened that I want to talk aboutā¦
He came out to her!!!
This season just felt very queer-friendly. I think it was because of all the subtle things Alfie said, heād also, maybe it was because the characters weren't all a part of high society, so the environment was more open and accepting (maybe that is to build for a new season with Francesca...)
This was something I dreamed about and thought was so crucial. I couldnāt decide whether it was fundamental for it to happen or just something I was deeply hoping, like I couldnāt tell if the creators of the show thought it was as important as I did. I'm so glad they did.
Who is the new Whistledown?
My top contenders are Hyacinth and, of course, Lady Mondrich, and here is my reasoning behind both:
Hyacinth: She wants someone to write about her season. She has always loved Whistledown, ever since it was first introduced in season one; she was very interested. She wants to discover more about herself, her words after her talk with Eloise.
Lady Mondrich: She wants to do something greater/make more of an impact than just being the Queen's lady. Iāve heard people say the language of Whistledown has changed to point to an author with a different, less āraised in high societyā accent, though I didnāt notice that at all. That to me doesn't define who Whistledown could be; there are many high society, but less well-read people than Penelope, which could impact the new voice of Whistledown.
Michaela's characterization!!!
I love her. I was expecting a social butterfly after her debut at the end of S3 (how she introduced herself to Eloise and Francesca), but she leads a room gracefully and energetically. I love her relationship with John. John was like my favorite man (I stand by that, RIP <3), and I saw a devastating edit of that Taylor Swift song with the lyrics "I don't mean to make this all about me, but who am I supposed to talk to" over John and Michaela, soul-crushing.
That beautiful ruby dress, she is so amazing, I am very much looking forward to learning more about her and why John was so adamant about Francesca not setting her up with a suitor (I deeply hope he knew and didn't care, I wonder if she knew he knew, or she finds out he knew. They were so close, like he was the only person she could be honest with adn I think part of that comes with knowing each other fully
The guilt she had/will have for loving his wife...ahhhh. Leaving after Francesca grabbed her hand oooo.
I've seen the ads where Michaela says she doesn't enjoy the mundanity of society life, so I deeply wonder what she does in the places she visits, what she is running away from, etc. (I wonder if she regrets not spending more time with John while she could (more grief yay!))
John is dead
I am sad but not disappointed like I thought I might be.
The way he left, looking at Michaela and Francesca, like he knew they would be okay, and he was so happy the people he loved most in the world loved each other.
I have nothing! I saw a devastating edit to a Whitney Houston song (yes, that one and the āI have nothingās lined up perfectly, it was *chefs kiss*).
Francesca's fertility struggles idk how much they are meant to be discussed in the book, and I don't know if everyone will be satisfied if it ends here, but it doesn't have to if the writers don't want it to. I think it would be interesting, also, will her season be in Scotland, away from her family and all of the children/couples (aka constant reminders of what she doesn't have)?
Still, I really loved that moment between Violet and Francesca, and Fran is holding so much guilt that she betrayed John by not giving him children. During that breakdown, all I could think about was how devastated she sounded that she had somehow hurt/betrayed John by not being able to give him the life he wanted. I think part of her season should be about her realizing she was everything he wanted, because her recovering from that guilt and grief is the best way to move forward.
Hazel and Footman John!!
The flirting Hazel did to make him leave his post was amazing (what a girls girl), and the eye contact during the wedding, I didn't realize how low my bar was, but I was somehow satisfied by that at least for right now. They are so cute!
Also, when the staff, including Hazel, had to interrupt the Briderton family's spiral when they thought Sophie had left. I thought that was a good example of the new relationship between the family and the staff (they can speak up and interrupt the family so these rich dummies get their sh*t together). They would literally be helpless without their staff.
The Wedding!!
Alfie walked her down the aisle! We got the perfect wedding of my dreams, the Bridgerton family and staff (out of work clothes) alike. And Posy and her, I am assuming, new husband were there, which to me totally means he is a good man, considering he sat on the Sophie/staff side of the wedding attendees.
Anthony talked about Sienna.
It was in like the worst way possibly, honestly, so disappointed in you, Anthony. Do better, you can admit she wasnāt your true love, but donāt act like she was the one holding you back from finding it š.
Glad he admitted he was wrong in the end after Benedict and Sophie got married.
Possibly unpopular opinion: I really like Araminta.
I think it's really easy to hate her, similar to how people hate Lady Featherington, but I always find it hard to fully hate women in shows like this. Of course, they do awful things, and of course, they are products of their environment, but they also have those moments where they are just very human (Lady Featherington's: I am a mother! moment and Araminta's anger at Lord Featherington for leaving her with Sophie and the burden of his past mistakes).
I can love them as complex female characters and still think they are both jerks, though. :)
Also, Varely and Lady Featherington! They held hands and were so great after the forgiveness/apology.
Her manipulating Posy was awful, though, but I did enjoy the kind of sister solidarity between Posy and Rosamund, where when Posy asked about the dowry, Rose looked a bit guilty and shocked by her mother's actions.
Those two were great siblings. When they were in the Bridgerton house, trying to subtly argue across from Eloise and Hyacinth, it was great.
Violet, you were my goat this season.
I was irritated by your classism, I am always annoyed when she is a little closed minded, especially when you find out how open minded she was in Queen Charlotte (I need a Violet prequel during the wait for one of these next seasons! Especially after she dumped Anderson/Danbury's brother becuase she doesnt know if she wants to be a wife again) but I hope opening her arms to Sophie at the claim of love will help her accept Francesca next season (yeah, I waited so long to post this that season 5s main character was announced š¤¦)
The Queen and Danbury
The goodbye, dear lord, that scene where she nodded a goodbye at Charlotte and Brimsley, was the closest I was to crying the entire season, and constantly seeing that painting of a young Danbury and Charlotte. Their friendship is so amazing.
I also enjoy the side relationship between Brimsley and Danbury (he said he always liked her during the Queen Charlotte show, which is why he advised Charlotte that Danbury was a good lady to trust). They take care of their queen so well. Now it is just Brimsley and Mondrich. I am really interested to see how it goes. Also, I stand by that I want Brimsley to know about Francesca and Michaela. If the Queen will have any part in this season, I need Brimsley to be there too; that actor can really show his whole heart through his expressions(side note: isn't it book canon that George and Charlotte saw Brimsley and Reynolds dancing together, why is it different in the show? Or is it not different and Charlotte will reveal it later god I would love that (maybe if George died... no, she would be too angry to hide the pain to sympathize with others, I think)).
I wish Francesca got a season on her own (as a background, but then again, she has been a background/subplot character throughout the last two seasons) as a subplot where she grieves and, you know, grows on her own. But that is just because we barely got to know Francesca on her own because she was barely in seasons 1 & 2, but I am very excited to see what they do with the season and to learn more about Francesca and Michaela.
So, Iām drawing characters from a story Iām avoiding writing.
If you just always ignore the reference photos they look okayā¦(they donāt exist OooOoOoo *wavy hands and forget magic šŖ *)
This is probably just part one so here is a spot for later links to posts about this story:
Anticipating Bridgerton Season 4 part 2 (book lore mentioned a bit)
Manifesting an alive and relatively healthy John (hints to the future for the book readers, but let the show watchers be so unaware).
Manifesting more Charlotte and Lady Danbury moments
Manifesting a true discussion of classism and not āall problems suddenly get resolved when I somehow rise you your levelā (he want downstairs to get to her she went upstairs to get to him and then the met in the middle before the Itās a bad Idea scene thatās what I need (also I really want her ābelow stairsā friends aka her best and truest friends to be at the wedding).
Manifesting John (the footman) and Hazel need to be something they are so adorable (lowkey want Sophie to give him a pep talk where he is feeling inadequate because Hazel joked about marrying rich and he knows he can never provide that for her, but Sophie (post her and Benedict crash out possibly) says something like who cares about money you can love her freely, truly, and fully and that is more valuable than any title)
Manifesting Violet being a mother to beautiful Sophie (there is a reason she names her first daughter Violet)
Manifesting Posy marrying a lovely human, like the Mr. Finch to her Philippa, he listens to her weird dreams and everything.
Manifesting Anthony discussing his mistress (Sienna) with Benedict and how he treated her like shit, and society allows him to do that. He thinks about the promises he broke and how much he hurt her and while she obviously was not his soulmate she did not deserve to be strung along by his empty promises of security (imagine if someone did that to his daughter).
Manifesting Portia Featherington apologizing to Varley for treating her horribly
Manifesting society realizing they suck and the maid war only happened because they donāt treat their staff well (Sophie and Benedicts love wonāt change society (especially since the Queen is still so passive about having over 100 maids) but I hope Lady Whistledown leaves a legacy not in just calling out Lady Penwood for mistreating Sophie but also to all of society for being awful to their staff that makes their privileged lives so easy)
Manifesting we find out more about Sophieās backstory through the Bridgerton ladies (Violet, Eloise, etc.) investigating.
Manifesting more Alfie the Penwood footman and Irma presence (they are gonna size up Benedict hard protective vibes) (also I want them at the wedding somehow all of the Bridgeton staff should be there they are Sophieās friends and family) (also was I the only one who noticed Alfie changed his accent when he was treating Sophie like a Lady I episode 1 or 2 (he went from like thick accent to upper classy fake accent when he was in public) I wonder how many staff members pretend like that).
Manifesting flustered Michaela (hidden).
Manifesting Michaela character development
Manifesting Francesca reaching the pinnacle with her husband not only gay thoughts (gay thoughts and fertility insecurity be gone I want Fran to fully give-in to her pleasure sheās so tense (I mean not completely gone with the gay thoughts (see prior post about my Michaela and Francesca feelings)).
Manifesting a good set up for the next season with hopefully less of a wait time š¤š¤
That is all I can think of right now, I need to finish my work so no more tumblr posts tonight (at least not before midnight š). Have a good evening, night, day of waiting to watch the show.
And in case something goes horribly wrong I will preemptively say:
Sorrows, Sorrows, Prayers
I keep imagining a Byler edit (or maybe a primarily Mike wheeler edit) to Absolution from Bare (specifically that end part). Now I am not okay.

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My biggest hot take about Milevenās romantic relationship in season 1 is I wish they didnāt kiss on the lips. I wish he kissed her on the cheek or something because I think it wouldāve been better if they focused on her allowing Mike to get that close without El flinching back instead of on the kiss part of it (because Eleven doesnāt even know what a kiss is yet. If she had seen it on TV at any point throughout season 1 maybe Iād like it more, but she didnāt (as far as I recall), she only saw romance on television in season 2 and I think the snowball kiss was pretty adorable even if it was fan service according to Millie).
I know Mike is copying what he sees around him so a kiss on the lips is like the epitome of romance that he knows currently, but I think that would also show Mike, while wanting to express the affection he canāt verbalize, also wants El to be comfortable (but I get I canāt expect an 11 year old to be able to read someone he has known for a week this well or have this level of emotional intelligence). I also think that wouldāve made the snowball kiss better as a first kiss, instead of a kiss after a year, then El wouldāve gotten her cute first kiss at a first dance now that she knows what a kiss is (because she has been consuming media and seeing a bit of the real world and forming her own wants and desires a bit). I also only think this is a hot take because people really like that scene or are really obsessed with typical/normalized representations of romantic love in television, but idk š¤·
(This also may be a personal bias because I think romantic forms of physical affection are more impactful than kissing in TV/media. For example, when Mileven reunited in season 2 the fact that they hugged instead of kissed and held onto each other as they talked was so much better than any dramatic kiss wouldāve been.)
The biggest Byler proof to me
(as someone who didnāt really ship Byler until season 5 but then looked at all the evidence people had come up with a was like damn thatās really good/compelling/interesting)
The following rant of all my possible personal biases went on way longer than intended continue reading the original point of this post at the red text: (still love mileven though wish they got more screen time in s5, but am 100% pro a single Eleven because I donāt think her only freedom in life should be in a relationship (which sheās been in since she didnāt even know what she liked to wear). I want her to discover herself without pressure or emotional drain or insecurity (like in season 4 during the whole āyou donāt love me anymoreā and āyou think Iām a monsterā convo) caused by her relationship and if Jancy was going to breakup Mileven should have as well if they are using the whole trauma bonded, love each other but hurt each other/struggle to understand each other anymore kind of way (I also think if mileven had broken up then El would still be alive not for writing reasons just character reasons it would have been a better representation of her freedom and journey to self discovery and as much as I hate stereotypes the whole āif you love someone let them go and if they come back to you theyāre yours and if they donāt they never wereā thing)))
Continue reading here:
Is the fact that Will, Mike, and El could never all exist together in relationships (platonic or romantic) without struggles (specifically caused by Mike) Correct me if Iām wrong (if I am factually wrong anywhere in the post please correct me, I am writing this from memory) but in season 1, Will was stuck in the upside down and in this time El became the mage (as opposed to the cleric) and grew close with Mike. In season 2 El is gone and we finally get to see the dynamics of the Mike and Will ābest friendshipā we had heard about in season 1, and it was lovely, their relationship, much like El and Mikeās relationship in season 1 was different from their other friendships (not a more powerful form of love or anything (yet) but Mikeās treatment of El and Will is just clearly different).
Then in season 3 we finally get to see all of them together and that is when the relationship issues between Byler and Mileven start onscreen. Will and Mikeās friendship falls apart (The āItās not my fault you donāt like girlsā argument was actually devastating to me as a young queer kid who learned about that part of myself from Robin and Will in this show) and Mike and Elās relationship falls apart (which you can argue is mainly because of Hopper but I argue is mainly because in both of these relationships Mike has started masking his emotions and forgotten how to communicate properly (getting defensive and hurting the people he cares about)).
Skip forward to season 4 (because those plotlines (specifically Mike and Willās was forgotten after the monsters showed up again whereas Mike and Elās relationship issues were made an issue of the entire group after the āBecause I love her and I canāt live without herā declaration (oh foreshadowing my cruel mistress)) in season 4 we learn Will likes Mike but Mike was the one pushing Will away in season 4 and in this season (wth was that awkward hug my biggest Byler proof is that change in behavior). Also I have never seen any of these characters more miserable (in a plot line not about sci-Fi monsters trying to kill them) than at the dinner table right before Mike said his āshe didnāt look fineā comment or in the car on the way back from the roller rink everyone was miserable.
(Side note about the queer rep of Will in season 4 before I rant about season 5 got to the next red text again: Why was Mike pushing Will away? Why dude? and then why is Will the one who has to shove his feelings down to build up a straight relationship like Iāve seen this before in movies and shows with queer characters and Iām sick of it, but what is worse is I can see it being in character because Will just wants both the people he loves to be happy and unlike Mike he can actually demonstrate his feelings through his art (the painting) instead of bottling them all up (so now Mike has a beautiful example of what he assumes is Elās love and faith in him (because he is oblivious) and this strengthens their relationship with a lie and gets mike to buck-up and says he loves El) as he admitted to in season 5. Anyway, this is just me hating that plot line. I want to say that I get it, but I donāt, Will wasnāt acting weird because of his romantic feelings for Mike he was okay (not really, hence the crying in the van because not only can he not tell his bff that he loves him and has to building up his relationship with someone else but because he is in love with his bff he canāt even tell him he is gay leaving Will almost completely alone except for Jonathan (I love Jonathan)), but he would be okay if they just stopped the unrequited queer crush stereotype right there but they dragged it into season 5 like a corpse on a leash dead before it even got there man), Mike was acting weird and needed to grow on his own (fix them insecurities) to fix his relationship with El, BUT also this is debatably the most best friend theyāve acted in awhile at least in TV best friend terms (Tv besties talk about crushes and relationship issues, but then again Mike and Will never have on screen before about their own relationships they talked about Max joining the party in s2 because Lucas and Dustin had crushes in her and Mike didnāt want anyone else in the party, andā¦I donāt remember but I thought there was something elseā¦OH they talked about El briefly in season 2 also, when Mike was mentioning her wistfully right before the ācrazy togetherā convo. Remember? Will was like no one understands and Mike said Eleven wouldāve(because he wanted to share this amazing person he met with another amazing person he know because he believes they would truly understand each other), referencing his special relationship with El to Will) Jesus this went on way to long and became a rant within a rant)
Continue reading:
Onto season 5 Mike and El are apart for a majority of VOL.1 which was when Byler got pretty popular because that relationship thrived while El was gone we got season 2 dynamics! We got Mike being a great friend inspiring Will with his powers, standing up (along with the rest of the party) to Dustinās bullies, having a deep conversation with his sister. Very āThe Heartā behavior. Then VOL. 2 ngl they donāt really focus on either of those relationships as much as they should have, especially not to set up a beautiful final reunion final goodbye between Mike and El or a heart to heart on the tower after the coming out scene with Mike and Will (not that the duffers planned to write that scene anyway but donāt even get me started on that otherwise this post may never end). Then the finale I honestly think they fumbled both relationships but that is mainly a personal opinion, but I do think it is undeniably true they did not spend enough time with these 3 characters and their dynamics with each other.
Iām not saying this to prove either ship is undeniably cannon or to tell anyone who to ship. Do what you want. Iām just saying I think the biggest thing that allows Byler shippers to ship it and truly believe it could be cannon, and have so much evidence in subtext, and lighting, and indirect storytelling, as well as character dynamics and all the things that make a show into something as great as ST has been, that drew people in back in S1, is just the fact that Mike as a character and his relationships with El and Will never really existed at the same time very well so it is easy to build up both relationships.
Overall S1 and S2 Mike I miss you. You were a great friend to El and Will and I actually believed you would be a great boyfriend to El but then you got all weird. And I really want to feel bad about saying that because he clearly has major trauma and is repressing his emotions to seem brave to those around him (Mike the Brave), but I was talking to someone about how I didnāt like Mike anymore even though he was my favorite character in s1 and 2 (Mike, El, and Will are my favorite characters overall) and they said āGod forbid anyone make mistakesā and I was like a character can absolutely make mistakes and a real person can do what Mike did and never truly recover those relationships but this is a TV show and the Mike and El and Mike and Will (and El and Will (not that Mike ever got in the way of my trauma siblings <3)) relationships were the center of the show and driving points to Mikeās character so his character just seems like a writing fail and it makes me sad. (These gifs are the ones that showed up when I searched Stranger Things and Mileven respectively I didnāt really think about the placement but it is nearly five am and I need to be done)