Random thoughts on a fic.
Today I read the Letters of Tomorrow series by AkaneRei just again, and god it gives me the same heartache like the very first read. Maybe because Jeankasa is the endgame here that Rivamika's story hurts so bad. Probably one of the most tragic RM writing ever.
(Fyi, it wasn't finished yet so the Jeankasa endgame still isn't there for now, just confirmed by the author. And although I'm not a multi-shipper, I'm pretty chilled with any other pairings in RM fics except EM heh)
I especially LOVE how the author made Levi the helpless man obsessed with the thought that his house was haunted by Mikasa.
Have y'all read Richard Siken's Crush? There was a poem named Boot Theory that went like this:
"A man takes his sadness down to the river and throws it in the river but then he's still left with the river.
A man takes his sadness and throws it away but then he's still left with his hands."
Yes, I think it pretty much summed up Levi's despair and yearning for his lost love there.
It literally breaks my heart here. How he knew he shouldn't keep her ghost next to him, all the while fearing the precious memories of her will slip through his hands like sand. Why I love seeing Levi hopeless and tortured - I don't know, so - sorry.
I think I can pretty much picture Levi burning down his own house, watching it collapsed while he can't help but admit that the cruel woman named Mikasa has completely ruined him, left him a mess of a man. Now, have you guys watched Decision to Leave (undeniably this year's best film and also to be one of the greatest in history), dir. Park Chanwook? It's about a detective who fell for a mysterious widow after she became the prime suspect in his latest murder investigation. Did she really murder her husband? Yes. But he found out, still he set her free and told her to destroy the sole evidence, because obviously - he loved her. When they parted ways, he said:
"I'm completely shattered".
(๋ถ๊ดด: shattered, collapsed)
You know what, to break Humanity's Strongest Soldier is to break a Wall. God, who could even leave Mr. Ackerman a man broken beyond repair if not our little Ms. Ackerman?
That said, this was one of my favorite RM piece even though it killed me inside out. But what would it be of RM if not tragedies? Maybe I just can't stand suffering from this pain all alone lol.