I hope you get what's coming for you

i don't realize how close we get until someone rips my hands off your throat

i didn't see how much i held a grudge until i wished that i hadn't let go

why was the abuse excusable until i had enough of it

why am i the one to blame when you started the fire

why do i still wish you burnt down with me

my eagerness, i think, has been damped

i long for the feeling of being so lonely

and here in my life, you've camped

but i can't afford to go

and i'm watching the road fill with snow

and i've never felt so trapped in a box

i love you, or not, i don't know

why is this stuff so hard

feels like i've buried myself in the yard

don't know what way is up, just need to find air

but i'd feel guilty if i caught you off guard

i'd love to always be friends

but i don't think that's how this ends

i'll keep biding my time, taking down rhymes

I followed the path of anguish, and loved those with broken bones.

You raised me on bar fights, war crimes, and your own lonely misery.

how does it feel to know me less than a perfect stranger

would you love me too?

or would you use it just to feed that beast in you?

i can see the way you've got no peace in you.

can't believe i stuck with you for so long.

and now these days,

i never really have

but i think i'm okay with it

because if i am no one now

i can't set expectations for the future

that the only thing you taught me about the lord

i said that it meant i was in love with the idea of love

so in love with it that i stayed when you turned to poison

if i loved enough things would be fixed

but they never were

i once told him that i was a hopeful romantic

the hold you had on me is loosening

and everything is said and done,

You won't love me like I loved you.

Because I still mourn you with the breeze,

now the life we shared torn down like trees,

You destroyed everything we built.

The people that I helped you reach,

the hate for me that you helped teach,

You are a red flag I didn't see too soon.

A love we had never fulfilled,

and now I know you want me killed,

you speak like the mumbling creek

you opened your arms and called to me

but i wish i could say you hit me

i wish i could prove the bruises you left on my soul

i wish people could see how absolute your wrong is and that you were not the victim

i still cannot ride along in a car in silence for fear that i've done something wrong again

why was it always me who was wrong again

why did you only start to push away when i started to climb to my salvation

why was it that you recoiled when i extended my hand to help you

you poisoned me for a lifetime for something you would forget in a year

and god do i want to forget, but my scars run too deep and i want to be free

i just want to be free again