i am so sorry

hehe, i’m kind of glad i got a messing prompt. i just. never talk about my like of that specific part of my interests. anyway, im fairly certain i know who this is, since i was talking to you at the time i got this request. then i spaced out for three months and lost contact. but whatever, im at a family reunion, so might as well write this sort of stuff. 

but, i did try to write this gently. its not noncon, it’s not super consensual. it is an accident and not just sexy times. 

Okay so I went on a bit of a brain tangent with this one.

There’s a historical trivia note about Native American warriors drinking a lot of water the night before a battle so they’d wake up early. Now, I don’t know if that’s true, but it’s certainly a good starting point.

(It’d be good for bedwetting too if you’re into that. I’m not, personally.)

But let’s say the orc tribe is going to war, and they want to get the drop on the other side. They were traveling late into the evening to get as close as possible, and many of the warriors are tired and apprehensive as they get ready for the night. They can’t admit their nerves, of course, because they’d be seen as weak. So they follow the lead of the more confident warriors, drinking from huge decorated bottles for expressly this purpose.

Most of the warriors wake up as planned. Some, weaker bladders or lighter sleepers, get up hours early. Full and aching, they crawl out of bed and stumble to the latrine, some leaking or clutching themselves. It’s a little shameful to be an early riser in this case, so they’d only get up once they absolutely couldn’t hold it. Some try to go back to sleep, only to find themselves even more desperate an hour later, and this time they know it’s either get up or wet, and the second option is looking more and more likely…

And then there’s the ones with the opposite problem, who slept too soundly and don’t wake up until the rest of the warriors are ready to leave, relieved and refreshed. Their bladders are strong enough that they slept through the night, but now that they’re awake and on the move it’s unbearable. And they’re already being mocked for oversleeping, so they can’t ask for a pit stop. All they can do is try to sneak off, or keep holding and hope that they can make it until the fighting starts. In the heat of battle no one notices some urine among the blood and sweat.

Inevitably, someone can’t. They were showing off and drank too much, and tired from hiking so they slept deeply. Their bladder is so full they could barely buckle their belt (and doing so caused a long leak), but they’re too stubborn to admit defeat, even as stabbing pains and dribbles mark every step. If they could hold their crotch or squirm around they could last longer, but they’re trying to hold their posture as well, hide the fact that they’re quickly losing hope of making it. Finally, as the sun rises and the enemy camp comes into view, the warrior loses the fight against their bladder, which completely gives out, and they piss so hard and so loud that the whole troupe knows. They can’t do anything but try not to moan and hold back tears as the liquid they tried so hard to contain splashes all over the ground. If they’d been a little closer, the enemy might have even heard and sounded the alarm. They try to laugh it off but they were struggling so hard that they can’t hold back their disappointment and embarrassment. As it is they’re utterly humiliated, even the other couple of warriors who weren’t able to hold it after hearing this one pee themselves have more honor intact.

Theme: Smut

Length: 2481 words

Warnings: None

I promised actual content today so in the next 10 min i give you my marauders omo headcanon scene thing.

-so i imagine that remus is the kind of person who is always on his own ass about being in control of himself. It takes a fuck-ton to get an outburst from him about anything. He doesn’t often complain honestly about things that are bothering him. And he is very much “mr. personal boundaries” about bodily functions.

-then there’s james and Sirius who are both “the boys’ clubiest boys’ club boys to ever boys’ club” and personal boundaries are for girls and pricks who believe that toiletries count as personal property. There is no such thing as an overshare to these boys.

-then there is peter who would love to be chill enough to be tbcbcbtebc, but has no confidence to do so and is pretty sure that if he tried to be as open and nonchalant as james and sirius it would just come off gross and awkward.

-this dynamic leads to problems such as certain marauders of the black haired catagory completely forgetting that others are not likely to just up as announce that they need to take a piss and walk off in the middle of a task or conversation.

-this also makes them oblivious to the fact that after sitting in the hospital wing for a good few hours downing potions to patch up fullmoon injuries, remus failing to announce that he needs to use the toilet does not mean that he doesn’t need to piss.

–or that he hasnt needed to piss for about the last hour of this conversation.

—which seems to be about purple cats, and he really hopes it isn’t the early stages of a plan to prank McGonagall because he is really only catching every other bit of the discussion, and if it is such a plan it sounds like a terrible life choice.

•Who wets when they have a bad dream?

•Who has the larger Bladder?

•Who is more likely to have a shy bladder?

•Who’ll only use an appropriate facility such as a toilet?

•Who is more likely to have the holding kink?

•Reaction to wetting?

•Who’d be caught wearing diapers? What would they and the other(s) do?

•Who’d be more Reluctant to take a nature piss?

•How would each individual help the other out if they happened to be in a situation where a toilet were unavailable?

•Who’d wet because of an anxiety attack?

•Who’d be more prone to bladder infections? How would the get one? Would they wear a diaper?

•Who’s more likely to have an accident in public?

Maybe in that time, their host needs to take them to buy clothes or to run errands and makes sure they use the restroom before they leave, but they can’t bring themselves to do it and end up impossibly desperate in the middle of a shopping center. They’re unaware that bathrooms exist outside of individual homes and too embarrassed to ask because they know they should have gone before hand like their host instructed, maybe even a bit resentful that they had to be instructed like a child. They stay quiet the entire trip, walking from store to store, trying on clothes, trying not to make it obvious they’re holding their pee until finally their host says its time to go home and they’re so relieved only to start losing control in the car on the way back Or maybe they make it back and mumble something about using the bathroom, only to be stuck in front of it worrying. What if they do something wrong? What had their host said about toilet paper? How much is too much? What if something comes up out of there? It’s connected to pipes right? what’s in the pipes?  Where will their pee go? Will it end up somewhere embarrassing?