a girl who is a noir detective man and a guy who is a femme fatale

The US is crazy bc like so many people have intense conspiracy theories about the government like "I think there's a secret elite group of people who control everything" and you can tell them "actually you're not completely wrong, it's just not a secret group of people, it's a bunch of rich people and lobbyists who are doing it all out in the open" and they'll be like "hmmn I don't think it's THOSE people though. I prefer my racist & antisemitic theories"

They'll be like "I heard there's a powerful ring of pedophiles who are influencing the country" and you'll tell them "I mean yeah that's what the Epstein files are about" and they'll say "no I'm pretty sure this has to do with The Queers actually"

Conspiracy theory no one will ever accept: What if the people secretly controlling the world are the same people obviously controlling the world?

Google how to make ibuprofen work now how to make painkiller kick in RIGHT NOW like NOW make ibuprofen start working instantaneously please please please

The people tagging this with good job Tammy are my heroes I love you all so much

my knight you have to live you have to get up you have to put your hand over your wound and hold it there. you have to keep walking and walking and walking because you cannot lay down yet, it’s not time. wipe the blood off your breastplate and look up into the sun. lean on your sword if you need to. lift one foot after another. get up. get up. this would be a pitiful grave.

this would be a pitiful grave.

sorry man i can't make it tonight i'm in the torture room again (my brain)

i hope everything reminds you of me and i haunt you forever (flirting)

"Was this book good or was I deeply 19 when I read it:" an investigative journalism series

“Was this book bad or was I simply lacking enough life experience to appreciate the narrative when I read it” : an award-winning followup

and the thrilling conclusion: "I didn't say it was good, I said I loved it: and other treatises deeply entrenched in nostalgia"

it's usually morally correct to make fun of the usa but whenever i hear british people do it it feels kinda tone deaf. idk if we have the high ground here guys. its like your mom making fun of your mental illness like ma'am where do you think i got it from.