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Trinity came to visit last Monday. It’s now Sunday, and she’s finishing packing up to go back home. Back to the real world.

At first, you were more nervous than Cassie and Trinity about all three of you living together. You knew that Cassie and Trinity weren’t particularly close, and that they have a coworker dynamic since that’s what they are to each other. However, despite never hanging out outside of work besides the occasional group outing, they’ve been meshing well.

Trinity stayed in Harrison’s bedroom, the previously closed door at the other end of the hallway that you always assumed was a guest room. Well, that is until you found out Cassie has a kid—then you put the pieces together.

You hit touristy spots with Trinity, sites she really wanted to visit. You also brought her to some of your favorite places. Cassie tagged along too, you being the glue sticking between them at first until they got more comfortable. You noticed that Cassie’s less touchy when you both are around Trinity, though, she definitely still touches you—just dialed back a bit.

It was nice having Trinity here with you. You’ve pretty much just been with Cassie this last month. You’re not complaining about her company at all, but you did enjoy seeing one of your best friends again.

A piece of home. A reminder that this summer is nothing more than a fun fling. Something that’ll eventually become nothing more than a distant memory soon.

Because of how much time you’ve spent with Cassie, you’ve grown accustomed to living with her. To sharing your life with her. It creates an emptiness within you to think of the fact that she’ll be out of your life when you get back to Pittsburgh.

Sure, you guys may remain friends, but it’s not the same. It’s not the same as living like a married couple in a shared home. How can you and Cassie go from basically being a couple to just friends?

You know her body inside and out. You know what makes her squirm as she does with you. You know how she tastes—sweet, salty, and so utterly Cassie. You know every freckle constellation on her chest. You know the noises she makes when she’s feeling pleasure.

There’s an intimacy there that makes it hard to imagine being nothing more than friends. Sometimes you wonder if it’ll be easier to just cut Cassie out of your life altogether once you get back home. You try your best not to think of it all, wanting to live in ignorant bliss.

Out of sight, out of mind, right?

“Okay, I have everything,” Trinity says with a sigh as she stands, pulling her closed suitcase up with her.

“You’re going to forget something,” you say confidently, giving her a knowing look.

“I have everything!”

“Okay,” you reply, clearly not buying it. “If you say so.”

“I double checked everything.”

“Uh-huh.”

“God, I forgot how annoying you are,” Trinity jokes. “You’re almost as bad as Fuckleberry right now.”

You laugh and shake your head. “He’s a better man than me. I think I’d go crazy living with you for more than a week.”

Trinity shrugs, taking no offense to your comment. “Back at you. Especially if you’re going to be fucking every night.”

“Hey!” you exclaim, your voice then lowering to a hushed tone, “I think you need your ears checked or something because Cassie and I did not fuck every night. For your information, we actually fucked way less than usual because you’re here. And we were quiet.”

“Yeah?” Trinity tests, crossing her arms and lifting a brow. You can tell you’re in trouble by the smirk growing on her face. “How come I know you like to call my coworker daddy, huh?”

Your eyes go wide and your mouth opens slightly, completely taken aback. You feel your face flush, heat traveling all the way up to your ears. You stare and blink at Trinity a few times, completely mortified.

“That’s what I thought,” Trinity says smugly, a cocky grin on her face.

“How?” You step closer to her, your voice quieting. “How do you even know that?”

“Thin walls,” Trinity tells you as she taps the wall beside her with two knuckles.

“Our bedroom is all the way across the hall from you!”

“Yeah, you’re not as quiet as you think.”

“There’s no fucking way,” you reply with a frustrated breath.

“Technically I was in the bathroom when I heard that. But still, you weren’t particularly quiet. Both of you weren’t,” Trinity says, her whole body dramatically shuddering. “I most certainly did not need to know what you or Dr. McStrap sounds like when you cum.”

“Oh my god,” you whisper, in disbelief that your friend heard that. “I’m, uh… sorry,” you apologize, your previous confidence faltering, replaced with embarrassment.

Trinity just laughs, seemingly not actually too bothered by it. “You would not believe the amount of times Huckleberry has heard me and Garcia fucking,” Trinity tells you, still chuckling. “He’ll be so happy to know that I got a taste of my own medicine.”

“Oh, he most certainly will be,” you reply, feeling relieved, though still disconcerted.

You open your mouth to make a joke about Trinity being scarred for life when you hear heavy footsteps down the hall, coming your way.

Trinity leans closer to you and murmurs, “she even walks like it’s heavy.”

You cover your mouth to stifle a laugh, knowing Cassie will be curious to know what’s so funny. She enters the room just a second later, you immediately standing up straight and pressing your lips together to suppress laughter. You feel like a kid trying to act normal when a parent walks in on them doing something they’re not supposed to.

“Hey,” Cassie greets you both, lingering in the doorway. “I presume this is yours,” she says as she looks at Trinity, holding up a croissant Jellycat that Trinity picked up as a souvenir.

You don’t say anything, but your expression straightens. You turn to Trinity as you walk backwards towards Cassie, extending an arm towards your friend, then to Cassie, bragging without saying anything. Trinity gives you a death glare, hating being wrong and hating you gloating even more.

“Yes,” Trinity grumbles.

Cassie looks to you. Then Trinity. Back to you. Then Trinity again. She smiles to herself, sensing a silent, playful argument.

“Here,” Cassie says, handing Trinity the plushie.

“Thanks,” Trinity replies, looking at Cassie but completely avoiding your smug gaze.

You cross your arms, Cassie placing a hand on the small of your back as you do. “What did I say?” you ask Trinity, your voice as level as possible.

“I’m not engaging,” she mumbles as she opens her “fully packed” suitcase back up.

“Did I or did I not say you were going to forget something?”

“Shut the fuck up,” Trinity says through a scoff, unable to fight the smile that’s coming out.

“And did you forget something?”

“Yes,” Trinity mumbles in a whisper.

“What was that?”

“Yes! God, you’re so fucking annoying, Jesus Christ,” Trinity exclaims as she zips her suitcase closed for the second time. “Yes, I forgot something. You were…” Trinity inhales sharply, the words feeling wrong to come out of her mouth. “…right. Happy now, asshole?”

“Very,” you say with a big grin, leaning back into Cassie with your arms crossed.

“So now that you have that, are you ready to go Santos?” Cassie asks, then glancing at the Superman alarm clock sitting on the nightstand. “The Mètro leaves in 10.”

“Yes, I’m ready. And thank you again for this trip, it was fucking awesome.”

“No problem,” Cassie replies with a smile. With the hand not on your lower back, she reaches into her back pocket, pulling out a ticket. “And here’s your Mètro ticket,” Cassie says to Trinity, extending her arm over your shoulder to hand it to her.

“Thanks,” Trinity says, plucking the ticket from Cassie’s hand.

You turn to Cassie then, Trinity pulling up her suitcase handle. “Are you gonna come with us to the station?”

“Nah,” Cassie replies, shoving her hands in the front pocket of her jeans. “I’ll let you two say goodbye alone.”

“Mkay,” you murmur, then giving Cassie a quick peck on her cheek before stepping past her to the hallway.

Trinity’s fighting back a grin, something Cassie catches. She scratches the back of her neck and drops her gaze to the floor, blushing with a sheepish look on her face.

“See ya when you get back, McKay,” Trinity says in a teasing tone. “Maybe you won’t be so red then.”

“Yup,” Cassie awkwardly replies, holding a hand up to say goodbye. “Safe travels.”

Trinity chuckles and passes Cassie, now with you in the hall. Your arms are crossed, giving your friend a glare, knowing she’s messing with Cassie—even if it’s subtle and harmless. You mumble hushed scolds at Trinity as you walk out, her just laughing.

You make the way to the underground Mètro station, knowing the way better than you know the public transport in Pittsburgh at this point. Trinity and you chat about the trip, making jokes every now and then. You know you’re going to miss her, but you’re also going to like having Cassie to yourself again, the carefree bubble you’re living in more protected this way.

When you reach the point where you have to scan tickets, you and Trinity pull off to the side to say goodbye. You offered to go with Trinity to the airport, but she insisted it’s unnecessary. Instead, you guys decided on parting ways at the Mètro.

“Well… I’ll see you in a month.”

“A very long month,” Trinity replies.

“Eh, time’s been moving pretty fast.”

“For you? Duh. You’re in fucking Europe having fun. I have to be at work all the damn time.”

“I guess that’s true,” you say with a small chuckle. “You’re just gonna have to enjoy the rest of the summer without your super gorgeous bff,” you tease, dramatically tossing your hair over your shoulder.

“And without my milf coworker.”

“Hey!” you exclaim, playfully elbowing her arm. “Back off.”

“Down girl,” Trinity jokes, pointing up both hands. “She’s all yours.”

“For the next month at least,” you say, a few seconds of silence passing after that.

“You’re different,” Trinity tells you, scanning your face with a small smile, almost like she’s in awe of the person in front of her. “Happier,” she adds. “Even when you were with Sloane, I never saw you smile as much as you do with Cassie.”

Shrugging, you push down that thought, burying your feelings about it. Convincing yourself that it doesn’t mean anything. That the warm feeling blooming in your chest is just because you’re doing better. Because you’re in Europe. Not because you’re with Cassie.

“I’m in Europe,” you reply to Trinity, a flat smile on your face. “I’m not working, my bills are paid for, I’m a whole country away from my ex… how could I not be happy?”

Trinity just hums in response, not buying what you’re saying, but also not wanting to push it. You notice she’s holding back though, and it bugs you.

Trinity’s always been blunt—even to her friends, and especially when the truth may hurt. She doesn’t sugarcoat her thoughts except for when she knows her words will cut through the person—always someone she cares deeply about and doesn’t want to see hurt—like a knife.

“Trin,” you press, “I wanna know what you’re thinking.”

“Just…” Trinity pauses for a second, sharply drawing in a breath. “Just be careful.”

“Be careful? I—”

“Love you, girl,” Trinity says, cutting you off and pulling you into a hug.

You wrap your arms around your friend, your brows knitting together in confusion. You’ve always prided yourself on being able to read people, but Trinity’s tough to figure out right now. It’s like there’s an invisible wall everyone can see through but you.

“I’ll see your annoying ass in a month,” Trinity tells you as she pulls back, grabbing the Mètro ticket Cassie bought for her out of her back pocket.

“Text me when you get to the airport and get home.”

“Will do,” Trinity says with a salute.

“Bye, bitch!”

“Bye, smiley!” Trinity calls out before turning around.

Once she’s out of sight, you make your way back to Cassie’s apartment. On the short walk, Trinity’s words ring through your head, playing on a loop.

You’re different.

Happier.

I’ve never seen you smile as much as you do with Cassie.

And you can’t help but wonder if that’s true. If maybe you’re blinded by the person bringing you that joy.

Because you know it won’t last.

Because Cassie’s just temporary.

Trinity left Paris three days ago. Now, you and Cassie are heading to Germany. The plan is to stay there for a week, but Cassie said it could always be extended if you want.

Usually, the two of you travel by train in the early afternoon. Today, however, you were both lazy and spent most of the day in bed, either cuddled or having sex. Because of that, the train you’re taking boarded at 3:30PM. You’re staying in Munich, so the commute there is just under six hours.

You and Cassie have been traveling for an hour so far. You chatted for a bit at first, mainly talking about what you wanted to do in Germany. Now you’re both reading books, settled in a peaceful silence. Cassie is reading Tipping the Velvet, a sapphic book you recommend to her. Knowing she took your suggestion makes you smile.

Since your guys’ nicotine habit is on a halt, instead of spending time out on the balcony smoking together, you and Cassie have used that time to read. In the last couple of weeks you’ve both already finished three books. Sometimes you’ll draw instead of read if creativity strikes, trading words for sketches to create your own visual story.

You’ve drawn Cassie three times, and she gets bashful when you show her. Cassie insists that’s not how she really looks, but you think she’s just not used to seeing how beautiful she truly is. Sometimes when you’re drawing and Cassie’s supposed to be reading, she’ll peek over, trying to catch a glimpse of what you’re creating in case it’s of her. But you make sure to show the final copy, wanting it to be perfect.

Like you, Cassie doesn’t always read. But rather than drawing, she writes. You’ve learned that she’s an amateur poet, something she does in her spare time for fun. She’s only let you read one of her works, and even then she was shy about showing you. But it’s one of the most beautiful things you’ve ever read.

Kisses of fire

Burn through my skin,

Through my soul

Your lips warm my skin,

A sweet act of devotion

Your kiss becomes an ember,

Glowing long after you’ve left me

My heart is lit by kisses of fire

Permanently

Cassie was so embarrassed and timid to show you, but you were dumbfounded—how could she think that was bad? Her words resonated with you, settling deep in your soul. Even now her poem remains echoing in your head. Kisses Of Fire.

Getting sleepy, you finish the chapter you’re on. With a bookmark you purchased at a local stationery store in Normandy, you place it between the pages, the shimmery baby blue paper dotted with paintings of shells holding your spot. You tuck your book in your bag at your feet, and then grab your earbuds. You put one in your left ear, leaving your right free since Cassie’s on that side. Then you lean your head back against the headrest and close your eyes.

The playlist you’re listening to is one (of many) you created for this summer. This one is made up of soft songs, perfect to daydream to. Futile Devices by Sufjan Stevens plays first, the familiar melody tugging at your heartstrings.

As the lyrics “and when I sleep on your couch I feel very safe” play, you feel a familiar hand on your thigh. You didn’t even realize your body was tensing until it starts to relax under Cassie’s touch.

“Are you comfortable, ma doux?” Cassie murmurs, her voice close to your ear.

Without opening your eyes, you nod. “Yeah. I do wish these seats lean back though.”

You hear the sound of Cassie’s book, the pages rustling. She places it face down on her lap, the book split to save her place. The hand Cassie hands on your thigh leaves, the absence of her heat making that spot feel cold. But then you feel her hand on your head, gently guiding it down.

“Is this better, or does it hurt your neck?”

“Better,” you mumble, your head now resting on Cassie’s shoulder.

Her hand returns to your thigh then, her grip firm yet still gentle. “You can move however to make yourself comfortable,” Cassie tells you as she picks her book up again, the copy she’s reading the same edition you have back home.

A minute later, Futile Devices fades and Venice Bitch by Lana Del Rey starts to play. You nuzzle into Cassie’s neck, enough to further her as your pillow, but careful not to disturb her. Cassie rubs her thumb over the skin on your thigh after that, silently communicating that your presence isn’t a bother. You let out a content sigh, drifting off sometime within the nine minutes of the dreamy song that’s playing.

By the time you awaken, the sun has set. Your head is no longer resting on Cassie’s shoulder, now on her lap. You slowly begin to sit up, one side of your neck stiff for lying stretched over like that for so long. You bring a hand to your ear, feeling that your earbud is no longer there. Even in your groggy state, you start to panic.

“It’s in your case.”

“Huh?” you mumble, turning towards Cassie. You rub your eyes, adjusting to the artificial train lighting.

“Your airbud,” Cassie clarifies, pointing to the build-in pocket in the seat in front of you with the one in her hand.

“Oh,” you say, looking at your case safely tucked away. “Thanks. And it’s AirPod.”

“AirPod,” Cassie replies sarcastically, playfully rolling her eyes as she goes back to what she was going.

You lean back in your seat and cross your arms, observing Cassie. The tray attached to seat in front of her is down, a piece of paper across the surface. One of Cassie’s hands is on the paper, holding it down as she writes away with the pen in her other hand. Without realizing it, you lean closer.

“Yes?” Cassie asks, her eyes still glued onto the piece of paper she’s writing on.

“Oh, uh…” You pull back, fully in your seat. “Sorry. I was just…”

“Curious?” Cassie finishes for you.

“Yeah. Curious.”

“Mm,” Cassie hums, not saying anything else.

You wait a few seconds, fiddling with your fingers in your lap before speaking. “Are you writing… poetry?”

Cassie huffs out a laugh, shaking her head with a smile. “Nope. A letter.”

“A letter?” you ask, confusion clear in your voice. “To who?”

“My son,” Cassie tells you, finishing the sentence she’s on before looking at you. Her forearm is blocking the piece of paper, and she habitually waves the pen back and forth between her fingers. “I’m gonna send it to him. I wrote a million letters before he left that the camp will distribute throughout the summer, but I wanted to talk to him now. It’s honestly more for me than him.”

“You can’t just call him?”

“There’s a no phones rule,” Cassie explains. “If there’s an emergency, obviously someone would reach out. And if a kid really wants to talk to their parent, the camp will allow it, but for the most part it’s no contact.”

“Why’d you chose that camp then?”

“Harrison chose it. There’s this basketball program there and he has friends going.”

“Oh,” you reply, nodding in understanding.

“Yup…”

“So you didn’t want him to leave for the summer?” you ask, hoping you’re not making Cassie uncomfortable by inquiring.

“Not really,” Cassie answers, the pen flicking the surface of the tray in front of her every so often. “He went to a month long camp last year and really liked it, but I could call him, and it wasn’t as long as the one he’s at this summer.”

“I bet that’s hard.”

“Yeah,” Cassie confirms, her voice barely above a whisper. A soft smile spreads across her face then, looking over to you a moment later. “But I guess it also kind of worked out for me.”

You chuckle and fight back the urge to pull Cassie into a kiss right here on the train. “Well in that case, tell Harrison I said thank you,” you joke, your tone clearly conveying that you don’t expect Cassie to actually do so—you assume she won’t mention you at all to him.

The way Harrison’s name rolls off your tongue hits somewhere Cassie deep in her chest. That simple word carrying so much weight coming out of your mouth. It’s intimate in a way Cassie didn’t expect.

You don’t notice the thoughts about you saying her son’s name churning in her brain though, Cassie masking the emotions flowing through her with a playful grin.

“His loss,” Cassie chuckles. “Oh!” she exclaims a second later, a thought coming to her mind. “You wanted to go Italy…”

“Yeah,” you confirm, your eyes trained on Cassie as she speaks.

“Well, uh…” Cassie sucks in a shaky breath, looking down at her lap and running a hand through her hair before looking back to you and continuing. “So…” A breathy, nervous laugh. “My family kind of has a house up in Italy. Oh! I told you my aunt was there this summer.” You nod, remembering Cassie mentioning it. “So since you want to go to Italy, I was planning on just getting a hotel. But, uh, I kind of mentioned to my dad I might be going to Italy— just casually, you know? And, well, he’s going to be pissed if I don’t stop by.”

“Okay…” you murmur, a bit confused where Cassie’s going with this. “So like I’ll explore Italy on my own while you visit them?”

“Oh, god no,” Cassie says with a snort. “I was going to ask if you’d rather stay in a hotel or stay with my family’s place. The place is big, and you’ll have your own space away from them.”

“Who’s there?”

“Let’s see,” Cassie mutters, glancing to the ceiling as she goes over the list in her head. “There’s my dad, aunt and uncle… two of my cousins are up there…” Cassie names, counting everyone on her fingers. “Oh, my grandparents are there too. It’s their home, they live in all year round since they’re retired, but we still call it our Italy family house,” Cassie explains. “That’s all the people I can think of right now.”

“Wouldn’t that be weird? For me to stay there with you guys?”

“Eh,” Cassie shrugs. “Maybe a little, more for me than for them, but they just know you’re with me. I told them I invited a friend to come to Europe this year since Harrison is away at camp.”

“I don’t want to burden them or make it awkward,” you tell Cassie.

“They’re very friendly,” Cassie replies. “I bet they’ll give you more attention than me. And, just so you know, the property sits beside a grape vineyard. There’s also a pool in the backyard and a secluded creek a little under a 10 minute walk away.”

“Sold,” you say with a smile, then lowering your voice to something more serious. “Assuming that’s what you want to do, and it won’t cause any issues for your family.”

“It won’t,” Cassie replies instantly, brushing off your concerns of intruding on her family. “And if you ever change your mind, we can always grab a hotel.”

“Okay.” You then pause briefly, letting the idea of you staying with Cassie’s family in Italy sink in for a moment. “When were you thinking of going?”

“Well,” Cassie sighs. “We only have three days left until we have to go back home. After Germany we’ll only have two weeks left, so… I guess it depends on how long you want to stay in Italy.”

“Would your family mind a week? There’s a lot to do there, and I think it’d be a nice place to relax too.”

“That’s perfect. After Germany we can go back to my place? We could spend a few days there recovering, and then pack up to go to Italy.”

“Period,” you reply enthusiastically, then reaching down to grab your water bottle.

Cassie chuckles, a smile hanging from her face as she watches you. “So it’s a plan?”

“It’s a plan.”

Yesterday your day was rather leisure. You and Cassie stayed in bed until noon, and when you finally got up, you migrated to the living room in your hotel room. When you both were hungry (aka after you had two rounds of sex), you guys got dressed to grab food from some place.

After eating a delicious lunch, Cassie took you to the English Garden, a popular park in Munich. Chestnut, oak, and maple trees towered overhead as you walked through the greenery. The weather was nice, a gentle summer breeze stirring the leaves, much like the one in the air today. There was a mixture of fellow tourists there along with natives.

Before you leave Germany, you want to go to that park again to draw. There’s a lot of inspiration there—wildflowers blooming along the edges of the trails, ducks gliding across the surface of crystal-clear streams while dragonflies skim over the water, the sound of birds singing and the leaves rustling, wooden bridges arching over ponds, and the historic Chinese Tower that resides deeper into the park. While you took all of that in, art ideas circled through your mind, coming to you as you and Cassie wandered through the tranquil landscape.

That garden was really all you and Cassie did yesterday, a simple activity before launching yourself in sightseeing. So far today you explored the Old Town which included seeing the iconic twin-domed cathedral Frauenkirche, you toured the Nymphenburg Palace where Cassie bought you a silk scarf you were eyeing, gifting it to you after you left so you couldn’t protest, and you tried pretzels from two different places. Now, both you and Cassie not yet full, you’re walking to a local shop that sells “heavenly” pastries according to Cassie.

When you step inside, a small brass bell chimes overhead. The smell of cinnamon, baked bread, melted butter, and coffee rolls into one rich scent. The sweet aroma makes your stomach growl, the exquisite pastries lining the display cases furthering your cravings.

Cassie approaches the counter and crouches down slightly to better view the options, you following suit. There’s a whole section that’s just bread, each one different and looking tasty. Rows of flaky croissants, fruit-filled pastries, buttery apple strudel, slices of cheesecake, and delicate cakes topped with fresh berries are showcased behind the glass. A glossy strawberry cheese danish catches your eye, you deciding to try it.

“You have got to try the apple strudel,” Cassie tells you, pointing to the baked goods in the display case.

“It looks really good,” you reply, standing upright, Cassie then doing the same.

“I’ll order it,” Cassie says. “We can split it.”

You smile excitedly, your mouth already watering. “Can I also get this?” you ask, pointing to the fruit and cheese plunder.

“Hell yeah,” Cassie says without hesitation, her shoulder bumping yours. “I’m gonna get a hazelnut bar too.” A pause. “It was my mom’s favorite.”

You turn towards Cassie, examining her expression. “Did you used to come here with your family?”

“No, we never spent a lot of time in Germany. But when we did visit, she always got a hazelnut bar from any place that sold them. Her favorite German bakery shut down around when Harrison was born.”

“Sorry,” you murmur, not quite sure what to say. “I bet it was a good spot.”

“It was,” Cassie says with a sigh. She then turns to you, tucking her hands in her pockets and pressing her lips into a smile that makes her dimples pop out. “But any local place that makes them knows what they’re doing.”

You nod, Cassie looking at for a moment longer before turning away. She takes a step up to the counter to order. You snap a quick picture of the displayed treats before joining Cassie, standing to her left.

“Hi, can we get an apple strudel, uh…” Cassie’s gaze shifts to the display case, pointing out the other two items. “And one of those strawberries and cheese pastries, and a hazelnut bar.”

“Yes,” the older woman behind the counter replies, her voice thick with a German accent. “Will that be all?”

Cassie glances at you. You give her a nod in confirmation. She shoots you a small smile before turning back to the worker.

“Yes, thank you.”

“Eight euro.”

Cassie nods and pulls out her beat-up wallet from her back pocket. You find it funny that she could easily afford to replace it, even with a designer one that costs hundred of dollars, and yet she keeps using the worn-out black one she got from Target at least a decade ago. It’s endearing.

“Here,” Cassie says with a polite smile, handing the woman a €10 euro bill. The lady takes it from Cassie and opens the register, about to pull out change when Cassie puts a hand up. “Keep it.”

Surprised, the woman looks up at Cassie. After a second, the corner of her lips turn upwards into a genuine smile, Cassie returning it.

“Danke.”

“You’re welcome,” Cassie replies to the German lady, tapping her knuckles on the counter before standing aside to let the people behind you guys order.

Another person behind the counter prepares your order. It’s a man younger than the woman, likely in his mid 30’s. They look alike, so you assume it’s her son. The man packages each pastry in a white bag, then handing it to you and Cassie.

You go outside to eat, sitting at a table. Cassie opens the bag with the apple strudel, the white paper crinkling. She pulls out the sticky pastry, setting it on top of the packaging. Cassie then slides it over to you, an expectant smile on her face.

“I get the first bite?” you ask, pointing your index finger to your chest.

“Yup,” Cassie says, pulling out the hazelnut bar she ordered.

“Okay,” you murmur, then picking up the apple strudel. You take a size-able bite, the apples and buttery cinnamon melting on your tongue, the warm and sweet taste nearly making you moan. “It’s good,” you mumble to Cassie, still chewing.

“Told you,” she replies, then taking a huge bite of the hazelnut bar.

You take another bite of the apple strudel, savoring the richness of the flavors before sliding it to Cassie so she can have some. As she picks it up to try, you pull out the strawberry cheese danish, your mouth watering at the caramelized sight.

The flavors explode in your mouth, the crisp, flaky outside giving way to a smooth and soft inside. The balance between the tangy cream cheese and the sweetness of the strawberries is perfect, the taste lingering after you swallow.

“Try this,” you tell Cassie as you hand her the strawberry cheese plunder, gulping down the bite in your mouth.

Cassie takes it from you, arching a brow. “That good, huh?”

Smiling, you roll your eyes. “Hey, be grateful I’m sharing it.”

Cassie chuckles as she looks down at the pastry, taking it in for a moment before bringing it to her mouth. As she bites into the dessert, she gestures to the hazelnut bar in front of her, telling you to try it. You reach out and snap off a piece of Cassie’s treat, the sound of a moan coming out of her echoing as you do.

“That good, huh?” you mock.

“Mhm,” Cassie hums, unable to get out any words with her mouth so full.

As she chews the pastry you chose, you try Cassie’s pick. The bar is a rich and nutty, the deep roasted flavor of hazelnuts most prominent. There’s hints of caramel and vanilla, the perfect blend. You can’t help but to wonder how much variety of German hazelnut bars there is— if this is the exact kind Cassie’s mom liked.

“I really like this,” you say, pointing at the square tan and dark brown hazelnut bar in front of her. “I know Trinity would devour everything too.”

Cassie lets out a laugh, passing you back your danish. “Yeah, that girl can eat,” she remarks, recalling her time with you guys.

As you and Cassie keep working on your treats, the conversation stays light, talking about your day so far which somehow morphs into the books you both are reading. People pass you as you eat, murmurs coming and going. Across the street there’s a guy sitting on a bench playing a guitar. The soft acoustics travel to where you and Cassie are sitting, adding to the peaceful afternoon.

She lets you have the last bite of the apple strudel before you take off to continue your tourist journeys, a tinge of warmth and affection blooming in your chest at Cassie’s simple act of consideration.

It still seems unreal that this will become nothing but a faint memory soon.

After playing tourist in Germany for the last three days, you and Cassie are spent. In two days you’re flying to Amerstam, and you’ll stay there for five days before flying back to Paris. You’re only going to have two days in France before you leave for Italy.

There are certain attractions and tourist spots you’re looking forward to hitting in each city. In and around Munich, you’ve seen everything here on your bucket list. Cassie took the reins and showed you some lesser known places.

Once of those spots was the Alte Utting rooftop ship bar. It’s a former steamer ship that’s since been converted to a bar that serves crepes and vegan food. Out of respect for Cassie, you haven’t had a single drink on this trip in solidarity. Especially at first, you weren’t super familiar with Cassie and didn’t want to make her uncomfortable. That day, however, she encouraged you to try a beer since Germany is known for them. You’ve never been a huge beer drinker, but you ordered one and ended up drinking half of it.

Another lesser known spot Cassie brought you to is the Hackerbrücke. It’s a 19th century iron bridge less than 10 minutes from the hotel you’re staying at in Munich. Yesterday Cassie took you there at sunset. A handful of other tourists came for the same purpose, all of you watching the sun sink in the bluish pink orange sky. You couldn’t help but notice the way Cassie kept glancing at you as you watched the sunset, Cassie smiling at your smile.

Now, after another long day, you’re on your way back to the hotel. Today was fun, and slower than the previous days, but still exhausting. The walk from the restaurant you just ate at to the hotel you’re staying at feels like running a marathon. It feels like a marathon when it’s only four blocks. Four.

To say you were tired is a huge understatement. You know Cassie’s been feeling the same way which is why you two are not planning on doing anything tomorrow. Hopefully you’ll be able to recharge and rest. God, what you wouldn’t give for a full body massage right now.

“Man, I can’t wait to go to sleep tonight,” Cassie says with an exhausted sigh.

“Me too,” you murmur in agreement. “I’m glad we’re on the same page about that.”

“You know, I thought I would have a hard time keeping up with you since you’re so young, and I definitely do sometimes, but you pretty much have the same stamina as me.”

“Are you calling me old, McKay?”

Chuckling, Cassie shakes her head and wraps an arm around you, holding you loosely to her side as you keep walking. “Hey, all I’m saying is that our energies are very similar.”

“Is that a good thing or a bad thing?”

Cassie thinks for a moment, mulling over your question. “Well, it’s good for me,” she answers, a smirk forming on her face. “It may not be so good for your peers.”

“Hey!” you exclaim, playfully slapping her chest since it’s what’s most accessible. “It’s a good thing I’m with you then, huh?”

“Hmm,” Cassie exaggeratingly hums. “It’s definitely good for me.”

“Stop saying that,” you say as you laugh.

“Why?” Cassie replies with a shrug. “It’s the truth. I get to have you all to myself this summer.”

A warm smile spreads across your face, Cassie’s playful words holding more weight than she likely intended. It feels nice to be desired. To be wanted. And Cassie being the one who enjoys your company means more to you than if others said it. You feel seen around Cassie and honored to see, according to Trinity, a closed off woman open up to you like she does.

“By the way,” Cassie starts with a mischievous smirk, her voice pulling you out of your thoughts. “I didn’t say this earlier, but you look really good.”

Instinctively, you scoff. “I look tired.”

“And still beautiful.”

“No,” you reply, chuckling. “I look dead.”

“Honey, you should see me after 12 hour shifts in the emergency room. It’s not a pretty sight.”

“I don’t believe that,” you say right away. “If anything, I bet you look hotter. I’ll have to have Trin sneak a picture for me.”

“Ew! I don’t photograph well.”

“You so do!”

Cassie shakes her head, smiling fondly. “You’re a liar.”

“Am not!”

Then, without saying anything further, you pull out your phone. You open the photos app and click on a candid picture you took of Cassie yesterday. You angle your phone so she can see it.

“Here,” you say. “You think you look bad in that?”

Cassie grabs your phone and lifts it to her face, squinting as she examines the photo. You snapped it last night at sunset. Before the two of you sat down to watch the sun fade from the sky, Cassie was trying to find the best place to view it from. While she was doing so, you took a picture of her looking at the orange sky, Cassie smiling softly with her hands on her hips.

“I guess not terrible,” she tells you, handing you your phone back.

You swipe a few times to another picture. It’s from two days ago at a pub you went to because Cassie loves their soft pretzels. After conversing with one of the bartenders, they let you go behind the counter, guiding you through making your own Schorlen, a nonalcoholic drink consisting of sparkling water and fruit juice. While you were back there, Cassie kept smiling and laughing. You were able to snap a quick picture of her before you returned to the other side of the bar.

“I look okay in that,” Cassie says as she looks at the photo of her in the pub.

“And this?” you ask, swiping to the right.

A selfie you took with Cassie appears on the screen. You’re smiling without teeth, Cassie smiling the same way. Her dimples carve her cheeks, and her blue eyes pop. Her hair is blowing in the wind, surprisingly not looking too messy. To you, Cassie looks like the most beautiful woman in the world.

“Okay, I kind of like that one,” Cassie admits. “But because you’re in it,” she adds, you giving her a look. “Send it to me.”

“Will do,” you reply, finally reaching the hotel. “And… sent.”

Cassie feels her phone vibrate in her pants pocket, alerting her that she received it. She leaves it there, but she reaches into her pocket and pulls out the room key as you head to the elevators. You’re on the fifth floor, having to stop at the second and third for others to get off before making it to the fifth where your hotel room is, luckily around the corner.

When you and Cassie get in, you both start taking off your shoes. It feels like a weight has been lifted off your chest, knowing you don’t have to do anything freeing. You have a hair-tie on your wrist which you use to put your hair up into a ponytail, hating the feeling of greasy hair on your neck.

Then you look over to Cassie, the ponytail she did this morning coming out. She’s opening the mini fridge, pulling out a water. Your eyes naturally wander to her ass as she bends over, unable to control it. When Cassie stands, you look down her body, admiring her. You eye the black barrel pants she’s wearing, then lifting your gaze to the green tucked in tank top that’s clinging to her torso. You don’t even realize you’re biting your lip as you stare at Cassie.

“See something you like?”

“Huh?” Your eyes jolt to Cassie’s, your face flushing slightly as it registers that Cassie caught you intensely ogling her. “Oh, uh, sorry. I’m just tired.”

Laughing, Cassie twists open the lid of the plastic water bottle, opening with a crackle. “You stare when you’re tired?”

You cross your arms and shrug. Cassie’s gaze remains on you as she takes a chug of water, a barely there smirk on her face.

“So you want to go to bed?” Cassie asks after she finishes her drink.

“I’m tired,” you repeat.

Cassie hands the water bottle, nodding to it to signal to take a sip. You take it from her, your fingers briefly brushing. Then you bring the water to your lips, taking a sip.

“So you don’t want to fuck?”

You nearly spit out the water in your mouth at Cassie’s words, the bluntness taking you by surprise. You’d be lying if you said that heat isn’t pooling at the bottom of your stomach, wetting your underwear. But both you and Cassie are tired, and you don’t want to push her.

“Why? Do you want to?” you ask, handing Cassie back the water with a cough.

“I asked you first.”

“What are you, twelve?”

“I do have a twelve year old,” Cassie smirks.

A pause settles then, the silence filled with a challenging stare.

“Fine,” you say with a sigh, giving in. “I guess I kind of maybe want to.”

Cassie stares at you for a few more moments, her expression not giving way of if she wants to too or not. Then she walks away, towards the suite bedroom.

“Coming?” Cassie calls out, not even sparing a look back at you as she enters the bedroom.

“Oh, uh, yeah.”

Cassie only reaches the bedroom less than twenty seconds before you, but when you come in, she’s already half undressed. She keeps stripping, her boxers the last thing covering her body.

“Wow, straight down to business?”

“Shut up and get naked,” Cassie orders. She’s not harsh, but firm, her tone void of any gentleness.

You do as Cassie says without thinking twice about it. As you strip yourself free from your clothes, Cassie’s already bare. She walks over to the nightstand drawer, pulling out her strap in its case. You scramble to finish taking off your clothes. Your eyes are on Cassie, watching her harness her strap turning you on further.

“Get on the bed,” she commands in a soft voice after you’re undressed.

You listen, crawling onto the mattress. Cassie walks over to the edge of the bed, you swallowing thickly as she stalks over to you. When you reach the headboard, you sit there, waiting for Cassie’s next instructions.

“Now lie on your back, baby.” You drop quickly. “Good girl,” Cassie coos, joining you on the bed. “Now how much of a warmup do you need?”

“I’m fine,” you tell Cassie, shivering as she runs a hand over your thigh.

“I know you think you are, but you’re not.”

You grab ahold of Cassie’s wrist, her eyes locking with yours as you do. You then slowly start to lower her hand to your core. Cassie licks her lips, never blinking as she stares at you. When her fingers make contact with your cunt, you gasp while Cassie’s lips part, a satisfied breath leaving her as she watches you squirm.

“See?” you murmur.

Cassie’s fingers teasingly part your folds, cool air hitting your newly exposed skin. “You’re wetter than I thought, baby. Guess you really needed this, huh?”

“Mhm,” you whine.

Cassie smirks darkly, her thumb finding your clit. She presses down, your hips immediately bucking up. Cassie starts to circle the bundle of nerves while two of her other digits wander downwards.

“You still need a warmup,” Cassie insists.

“I’m fine,” you reiterate, your eyes drifting to the strap attached to Cassie.

“So you don’t want me to play with your pretty pussy?” Cassie taunts, sinking her middle finger into your cunt.

You moan, your hands flying to your sides, gripping the sheets. Cassie barely gives you time to adjust before inserting her ring finger. She plunges knuckle deep while her thumb keeps moving over your clit.

“Oh, god. That feels so good,” you groan.

A smug grin flashes across Cassie’s face, her own arousal building as she toys with you. Suddenly, she inserts a third finger, the swift stretch burning a little. A moan falls from your lips, and you fist the sheets tighter, Cassie scissoring her fingers inside of you. She presses her thumb firmer against your clit, your hips twitching.

“So tight, baby,” Cassie murmurs as she presses against your gummy walls.

“Need you, Cass,” you whine.

“I know,” she replies almost mockingly, her voice sweet and smug. “You have me.”

Cassie curls her fingers, purposefully hitting your g-spot. You cry out in pleasure, your head sinking into the pillow behind you. Your back arches off the bed, and your hips start to chase the release you so desperately need.

But right as you feel your climax nearing, Cassie withdraws her hand from you completely, leaving you empty and unsatisfied. Cassie remains sitting on the side of the bed, keeping you waiting for just a few seconds longer. Then she begins to crawl next to you, sitting beside you.

“Come here,” Cassie murmurs, patting her lap to signal for you to sit there.

You grab Cassie’s shoulder’s and swing a leg over hers, straddling her lap. Cassie grabs your hips, her gaze momentarily dropping to your breasts before looking up at you.

“Go ahead,” Cassie tells you.

Immediately, you look down, aligning yourself with Cassie. The tip of her silicone cock grazes your clit, the feeling sending ripples of pleasure down your spine. Once you line up your entrance with Cassie’s strap, you look up to Cassie for permission.

“Please,” you whisper breathlessly.

Cassie squeezes your hips and gives you a nod. “Take want you want, mkay?”

“Fuck,” you moan, beginning to lower yourself.

“Let me hear you,” she requests, you nodding frantically.

You let out a heated sigh as you sink down all the way. Cassie only gives you a second to adjust before she’s thrusting her hips up into you. Gasping, you grab ahold of her shoulders as your whole body bounces.

“C’mon,” Cassie eagerly coaxes, her hands finding your waist. “I thought you needed to cum, baby.”

You moan at her words and slowly roll your hips. “I do,” you whine.

“Then do it.”

A moan spills from your lips as you grind against Cassie once more. Your fingers dig into her shoulders, needing something to cling onto. As you begin to settle into a rhythm, Cassie’s grasp on your hips grows firmer, roughly encouraging your needy movements.

You don’t even register that you’re bringing a hand to Cassie’s face, your mind hazy with pleasure. Your palm spreads flat on her cheek, your touch more than gentle. Cassie’s darkened blue eyes flicker up to meet yours, her lips slightly parted.

“My mouth is bored,” Cassie roughly murmurs, a smug smirk beginning to grow on her flushed face.

Your thumb brushes over Cassie’s bottom lip, swollen from previously kissing. Your eyes stay locked onto hers as you slowly push your thumb into her mouth, experimenting. Cassie moans right away, her tongue swirling around your finger.

“Better?” you pant, trying to maintain a steady pace as you grind on Cassie’s thick silicone cock.

“Mm,” Cassie moans, her eyelids fluttering shut. “More,” she mumbles, then opening her eyes back up, meeting your gaze.

You push your thumb deeper into Cassie’s mouth until you’re knuckle deep, unable to go any further. Cassie takes your finger like a straw, sucking your digit as if she needs it for air. Watching her enthusiastically lick and suck on your thumb brings you closer to the edge, more noises escaping you as the heat low in your stomach expands.

But then you pull your thumb out of Cassie’s mouth. She whines at the loss of contact, making you smirk. Before Cassie can complain, however, you insert your pointer finger, the digit brushing past her lips. You push it as far as it can go, the tip hitting Cassie’s throat. She starts sucking again, more careful than before so that she doesn’t accidentally gag with the added length.

Cassie’s hips juts up to meet the effort of yours, your release rapidly approaching as your body grows more limb with each hip roll. Wet, lewd sounds fill the room, both from Cassie’s strap pounding in and out of your slick pussy and from the steadfast redhead slurping your index finger.

Even though your orgasm is steadily building, your muscles are aching with each movement. You try and continue anyways, the relief of cumming outweighing the relief of giving your sore body a break. Your efforts naturally slow, however, and Cassie notices.

“Are you tired, baby?” Cassie asks, holding back a laugh.

“Yes,” you whine, seeing Cassie press her lips together to suppress a grin. “Don’t laugh, I know you’re tired too.”

“I’m old,” Cassie tells you as justification, the reminder of your age difference only turning you on further. “I’ll take over if you can’t keep going, but I’m gonna be in bed for a long ass time tomorrow. My feet and legs are already sore.”

“I can do it,” you pant, more determined. “And tomorrow I’ll thank you before you even get out of bed.”

“I’m looking forward to it,” Cassie replies with a crooked smirk.

Cassie tries her best to help you, pushing your hips back and forth. She lifts her hips every now and then, the feeling of her strap pushing into you deeper making you moan and shake with pleasure. Cassie can tell you’re getting closer, but more tired too. She keeps helping you grind, doing the same amount of work—if not more—than you at this point.

“God, I need a massage,” Cassie groans.

“I was thinking that on the way back to the hotel,” you pant.

“I’ll book us something.”

“Fuck,” you moan. “Tha-that would be amazing.”

“I can massage you sometime too.”

“That’s hot.”

“Mm really? You like the thought of me running my hands all over your body rubbing out all the aches and knots?”

“Mhm,” you whimper. “I want to do it to you first. ‘Cause you deserve it.”

Chuckling, Cassie rolls her hips up into you. “Focus on right now, baby.”

“Okay, I’m almost—”

You cut yourself off with a low moan, your orgasm beginning to start. Cassie leans forward, nipping at one of your breasts as your climax tears through you. Your nails dig into Cassie’s freckled shoulders, moans spilling out of your parted lips.

Panting heavily, you drop your head onto Cassie’s shoulder, the aftershocks of ecstasy still reeling throughout your body. Cassie slides her hands from your hips to your lower back, her hold featherlight. Being this close to Cassie right now, you can really smell Cassie’s natural scent—sweat, warm musk, and something so Cassie. Sleeping with and waking up next to Cassie has made you associate the smell of her with safety and comfort.

“Let’s get you cleaned off,” Cassie murmurs, gently hitting your lower back.

You pull away and hop off the bed. Cassie immediately moves to stand too, but you stop her. She looks at you, her brows drawn together. You don’t say anything, you just lean down and start to take off the harness secured onto Cassie’s hips.

Cassie lets out a sigh of surrender, leaning back against her palms on the mattress. You unfasten everything, and pull the strap out to clean your juices off of it. But before you walk away to the bathroom, Cassie stops you by gently grabbing the backs of your thighs.

“I’ve been having a lot of fun with you,” she tells you, her voice soft and exhausted.

“Me too,” you reply, grabbing the back of Cassie’s neck with your free hand, your thumb stroking her skin there.

“So thank you,” Cassie says, then pressing a kiss on your stomach. “For being the amazing person you are, and for understanding that this isn’t something real, you know? I mean obviously I enjoy your company, but I just mean that we’re not in a relationship.”

“Casual,” you state, your voice barely above a whisper.

“Yeah, casual.”

Cassie gives your tummy another kiss, her blue puppy dog eyes then flickering up to yours. She holds your gaze, and a warm smile creeps up on her face. Cassie’s loose grip on your thighs tightens just a smidge, like she’s scared you’re going to slip away.

It’s harder than you thought to keep what you have with Cassie casual. You’ve tried to convince yourself that it’s just because she’s the first woman who’s given you attention since your breakup with Sloane. Plus Cassie’s caring, easy to talk to, and good in bed—what’s not to like?

But it’s in moments like these where something suppressed deep inside you starts to creep out. Cassie defining your relationship as casual and saying it’s not real hurts more than it should. You’ve known since you met Cassie that she wasn’t looking for anything serious, and neither were you. The only rule that came along with this trip is that what you have with Cassie is a onetime summer fling that’ll amicably end after you return home.

Only it feels like it’s turned into something more. The casual kisses. Excessive physical contact. All the cuddles. Sex that feels more intimate than just fucking. The way Cassie has given you nicknames. How smiley you are with her and noticeably at ease when she’s around. The fact that you’re going to meet her family soon.

It doesn’t seem like it’s just casual anymore. Maybe it never was.

And that scares you, especially if what you’re feeling is one-sided. Cassie just reminded you of what you are to each other, and it’s not girlfriend and girlfriend.

But you’ve always known that it’s not a relationship and never will be.

So you have to swallow down your feelings, compartmentalizing them into boxes that will never be opened—not while you’re with Cassie this summer anyways. It’s just a silly crush you tell yourself, maybe something that was inevitable. And you’re certainly not in love with Cassie.

But it’s hard to convince yourself of that when she’s clinging onto you and looking at you like you’re the only person in the world. The only woman that matters to her.

╰┈➤ Next Chapter ✦ SMAU

July 8th

July 10th

July 12th

comments…

yourusername miss you already 🤧

→ trxnsantos @yourusername about to board n i’m mourning this trip 😔💔

yourusername pretty (drunk) girl !!

→ trxnsantos @yourusername god forbid a girl has a drink ONE day

→ yourusername @trxsantos “a drink” it was THREE…

cmckayy It was fun 🙌❤️

→ trxnsantos thanks again mckay 🫡

vicjavadi my paris princess <3

→ trxnsantos my dr j 😌💪

mel.king I hope you had a good time :D

→ trxnsantos the best !! miss u girl

dennywhitaker bring me back the plane chex mix they give you pls 🙏

→ trxnsantos ok

→ yourusername not you asking for a cheap ass snack the plane gives you instead of a real souvenir 😭

→ dennywhitaker @yourusername Trin being away for a week was a gift itself

yoyogarcia Come over after you land

→ trxnsantos damn ur eager 🫪

→ yoyogarcia @trxnsantos Trinity. Shut up. Just come over.

→ trxnsantos @yoyogarcia yes ma’am.

comments…

trxnsantos why am i barely in this hoe

→ yourusername you’re in three pics

→ trxnsantos @yourusername the first one is of my feet and the last one just has my legs and hand 😐

→ yourusername @trxnsantos 🤷‍♀️

→ trxnsantos @yourusername miss u too pookie!!!!!!!!

trxnsantos it’s a bad day to be a hot dog‼️

cmckayy ❤️❤️❤️

dennywhitaker Cute!

→ yourusername thanks :)

July 16th

July 17th

July 20th

July 21th

July 23rd

cmckayy Love 😍😍🥰

→ yourusername 🤍🤍

→ trxnsantos mckay being the first comment i said oh i’m sure

yourbestie bike qween

→ yourusername EVERYONE was biking in amsterdam omg

trxnsantos watch out world she’s taking on germany 🙂‍↕️🫰

→ yourusername ily!!!

yourcousin wait are you dating someone??

→ yourusername no haha, just friends!