Pyrrultra

Russell Adler.

here take something I will not finish.

There's a gross nagging feeling at the back of his neck, crawling down his spine

Like he's left a kid behind, alone and afraid when he thinks about his younger self.

He thinks about kids hes seen clinging to the corpses of their parents in massacred villages and battlefields,

And then he thinks about himself. He thinks about seeing that blond hair and those pigtails and leaving it behind. Rotting with his parents bones maybe, maybe just decaying with the house itself.

Despite the disconnect he feels, Theres no amount of patriotism he could choke on that can convince him deep down that the little kid had to be hung by their neck with a flag. That the rambunctious teen quarterback had to waste his freedom fighting for it, and theres surely nothing that can convince him to bring this up with a therapist.

I was doing some reading about "RAMCOA" (ritual abuse, mind control, organized abuse) and information associated with it, and it made me think of Bell since many of those mkultra tactics are used by perpetrators of ramcoa now.

It would be interesting to imagine, after the Duga ending or however you want to perceive an ending where bell survives, he experiences some personality system symptoms.

DID formation takes place in early childhood when a personality and sense of self is being formed, but it would stand to reason that after Bell killing adler, finding out his personality is highly manufactured from this person he has traumatic ties to, then lacking a grasp on himself and his new "place" in the world, He would experience a high amount of troubles with his identity.

Sure, he has perseus to tell him who he was, but would that be enough? He already had a powerful man tell him who he was and we can see how that went. Theres a part of him that is blank, There is a part of him that is constructed of adlers memories into a "Bell". There is a part of him that is tied to his past identity. And there is a human part of him that is begging for any of them to make sense to his mind, something he can cling onto that doesnt feel wrong. But now it all feels like an ill-fitting suit.

Just casual thoughts, here's another shapey bell