Wallflower

do not worry. i also felt like that when i was working. kaya palipat lipat ako ng office sa san miguel corporation. give it a little time. meanwhile, actively look for other options. (you might want to help me muna. ha.ha.ha.)

it is too early to tell what you are meant to do. but quitting this early will not be good for you. while you may be unhappy and stressed, there is a better way of coping with it. the more unhappy and discontented you are, the more you will dread everyday you work. as i have said, you are not in the worst place at this stage in your career. sometimes, having too many choices is not that healthy. i think sticking on to your job for a significant amount of time is a good idea. it will test your ability to cope with something you are not too happy doing. the sad reality is that we have to bear it because it is part of the learning process. If i encourage you to quit early, the next time you feel the same discomfort, you will not learn to cope but quit again.

I know of quite a number of people who were as good as you – or who were even better than you, but did not achieve their full potential because they always wanted to be happy with what they were doing. we need not go very far. Person A and Person B had to struggle with Company X because they did not have much choice. It is only now that they can do as they please because they have established themselves already.

I do not think you should lose sight of what you want to do. If you do decide to quit, be responsible enough to find another job before quitting. It will not look good if you quit without any definite job waiting.

i do not suggest that you immediately take the NGO route unless it is the CSR of a prominent company. while it is true that you will study later on, remember that your studying will require you to return back to the real world that you are in right now. burn out ka na, bok. you might want to take a vacation muna. madali naman maghanap ng rason at this point in time. while i am not against you doing social development work, i must say that those who succeeded in this field went through the regular careers that we have gone through. Tony Meloto worked in the private sector for a long time. Manny Pangilinan, etc.

i will always support you in any way you want me to. while the job might not be for you, you might have to grin and bear it while you are looking for a new one (whether corporate or NGO). i have taken less fulfilling jobs in my career but i have looked at them as the dots that connected me to where i am now. the more you despair, the more you will be unhappy. many people would love to take your place, given the opportunity. just look at this stage as the difficult stepping stones in testing your character and patience. probably, later on, with the benefit of hindsight, you will conclude that it was all for the better that you were not too hasty in making the decisions on this matter.

having said what i think, do not be afraid to make the decisions you think that best suit you. lagi lang naman kaming nandito. but as they say, do not make decisions when you are unhappy (or emotional). they tend to be the less logical ones.

labs always,

By the time you read this, palaro medalist na si tricia. Sa puso natin, parati siyang may medal. No. 1, ika nga, and the only one. Sino pa naman ang mas mahusay sa kanyang mag swim sa mga robredo. Pinakasexy pa. HUwag kang magalit ma and aiks. Masakit talaga ang katotohanan, ay mali ang malaki ang beywang, ay mali ay katawan dahil masikip ang damit. 

Tawag ako pagdating ko sa mga kangaroo. Makikipag-inglisan lang naman ako doon. Dito iyong consultant ng ADB, bida na naman ang Naga. Hindi na talaga mapigil. Pera na lang ang kulang. Sarap dito sa lounge. Ganda pa ng sounds. Lulubos-lubusin ko na.

Labs to all.

medyo nosebleed na rito bok. nabobore na rin. biro mo lahat ng pictures ko sa cellphone nalagyan ko na ng captions.  nakasulat na ko ng ingles na blog. hope to do the tagalog para sa abante tomorrow. mahirap kung ang mga nagtuturo ayaw ng diskusyon. pahinga na lang.

went to cologne cathedral yesterday. hope that someday, i can take all of you to europe. malalayo lang ang lakad pero pang culture naman. bad trip lang kasi mukhang mahal sa kalokohan. pati paggamit ng CR 1 euro, mga P67.

was reading your email. ganyan talaga ang buhay. magmayor ka na lang! ha.ha.ha. now you realize that the long and short of it is, parati may pulitika. everywhere you go. mag goberyno mag private. been there, seen it, done it! ha.ha.ha.

seriously, i hope you find satisfaction in what you do. that is the best motivator to working well. of course, ambition is another. malay mo dumating ang panahon, sinasakay mo na ko sa eroplano ng kumpanya mo.

am packing up. going back day after tomorrow. oks naman ang pahinga rito. kahit naglalakad ako, parang tumaba pa. tindi kasi ng tsibog. buffet at libre pa.

la akong magawa. pasensiya na paantok lang. sagutin mo naman!

  take care. labs.

University President Sr. Lourdes L. Albis, BED Principal Simonet A. Barrosa, USI Alumni President Yolanda Beguia, school administrators, teachers, proud and happy parents, Isabelinas—the graduating class of 2013 —how proud I am to be with you on your graduation day.

Thank you for allowing me to be part of such an important occasion. I only have very fond memories of our school, especially of this quadrangle where we are now. It has been witness to some of the most important events in my life – my own grade school and high school graduations, and my two daughters’ high school graduations. Every time I stand on this very spot, I always have the feeling that I am standing on the edge of something really big. Just as all of you are at this very moment.

After this afternoon, you are to take a big step from what is safe and familiar into an unknown and scary territory. You will all be moving to college, perhaps attending a new school, mingling with new classmates, and taking on bigger responsibilities. Everything will just get tougher. But such is life.

After I graduated from High School more than 30 years ago, and had my graduation much like the one you are having now, I went to College, eventually became a lawyer, got married and had children. Everything had been going well. I had a wonderful husband and with him, raised three wonderful children. I had a career I loved and I was living the kind of life that I always wanted.

But lives can change radically in the blink of an eye. Seven months ago, my husband flew home to spend what was supposed to be a happy long weekend with us. His small plane plunged into the seas of Masbate and he never made it home. It was a tragedy like no other and my children and I were devastated beyond compare.

Many people who came to the wake to pay their last respects asked us where we were drawing our strength from at a time when giving up would have been the easiest thing in the world to do and everyone else would have understood if we fell apart.

I guess it was faith that sustained us. It was faith that kept us from questioning the logic behind the tragedy. It was faith that prevented us from putting all the blame on God and on anyone else. We knew that my husband lived a good life and had served and loved without restraint. Even if his passing caught us unprepared, we believe that God called him home in his most perfect time. We realized that while death is so final, love is more powerful than the boundaries of this life.

In school and in your homes, you have been taught with much care for the first 16 years of your life. Your teachers labored to teach you what you ought to know. Your parents, despite working hard all day, may have stayed up with you all night to help you over your projects and homework. They exerted all means to show you the right values that you need to carry with you when you go out into the real world. These sacrifices were made all for you.

Some would say that your parents and your school are tasked to mold you to be a person of value. I disagree. Because as it is, you are already of infinite value. You were born precious, a unique being of the universe, containing all the seeds that God planted in you to be a person of value to the world. All the things your parents and your teachers taught you were only meant to awaken that innate value. All that hard work were only meant to stir up your talents so that you can serve Him and humanity. When we treasure our worth as God’s daughters, we can be better witnesses of the faith.

I do not know if you have read the book or seen the movie The Life of Pi. It is about a boy who survived 227 days at sea with a carnivorous Bengal tiger on a small boat. Remember Pi when you encounter fears and difficulties. The story teaches us that we are often afraid of the wrong things. Some of the things that we think will harm us, in the end, are the things that will transform us. Every difficulty that we encounter is a spiritual journey which gives us a chance to rediscover the very good in ourselves.

I cannot think of a tragedy worse than losing a loved one who has been the center of your life. But my husband’s untimely death gave me and my children life-long lessons.

We realized the value of never letting a moment pass by and treasuring each day. Most young people like you, with your whole life ahead of you, often feel impatient to move, as if compelled to speed through time. Listen to us old people: Don’t measure time with your loved ones by the hours or days. In time, you must learn to measure the golden moments that we hold on to when they are gone; these are the moments that take our breath away. These are the moments that are preserved till eternity.

Don’t sleep angry, because you never know what the new day will bring, or if the subject of your anger will still be there. When saying goodbye, as many of you will today, try to leave a happy, peaceful memory.

In this day and age, when people are consumed by the need to acquire wealth or power, always remember that people are more important than things or money. So guard your words, especially when you are upset. The greatest regret is when we want to take something back, but can’t. Leave nothing unsaid, but speak with kindness. Show affection always.

I hope you make your graduation a time to reflect on the kind of a person you would want to become. Whatever your decision will be, please remember there is much need for individuals who will fearlessly stand for truth and real service. For people who will stay true to who they are. Who will serve this country and our people with passion, excellence, and integrity.

Don’t wait until you’re older to serve and make a difference. Each day that passes brings new ideas and expands our world. You, young as you are, can make a difference. Stand up and make us, clueless adults listen. Bring your ideas out. Let them shine! Serve. Decide to begin today.

Do not be afraid of the future. Only the present moment is guaranteed. Make it a good one. Make every moment count. When you go out of this school, go and be God’s witnesses of faith. Make your school proud.

i am even considering leaving the country. of course together with all of you. pag mag-aaral ka na, it would be the best time to do so. medyo mahirap lang maghanap ng gagawin. but at least tahimik na buhay at tahimik na isip na rin.

looking back mahirap din pala na naitulak ka lang ng unos sa ginagawa mo. in a way, you are fortunate that you are seeking what you want to be this early. mahirap yong walang benefit ang talent mo. not so many choices. you take what is given you. yan ang buhay ko. masuwerte na rin. overachieving (depending on who is giving the assessment) pero parang may kulang.

i intend to write something on what would have been para huwag mong gayahin. pero actually kumpleto na rin naman lahat. it is 1159pm. lahat na tulog. magpapaggising daw si jillian ng 6am. bye na ako. baka mapagalitan ako pag di ko siya nagising.

do not read between the lines. i just whiled away the time para antukin ako. saka para naman ma-feel mo na normal yong mga problema mo.

labs parati!

To: AGR

Date: November 18, 2008, 1:28 AM

Subject: Balak sa Buhay

  Hi aiks,

Mama left a few hours ago for the airport. Paalis na. Tapos na vacation namin. Thanks for coming home (to babysit). I hope you can do it more often.

Last week, per my request mama submitted our resume to test if we can qualify to move to Canada. It seems that we do. Just one of the things I am considering for my retirement. Anyway, I am no barat obaba. I am just like most na naghahanap ng tahimik na buhay rin.

This is not the reson why I wrote you. I was reading an article in Fortune magazine on what is the most critical element for success. First, the article says, it is not talent. Many people who have more talent than many others did not succeed. Your father did not have much (ha.ha.ha.). Second, it is not education. Sample niya yung dalawang regular students from Harvard and Dartmouth who became COO of Microsoft and GE. Mga ordinary students lang sila like Obama and Bush (kagaya ng tatay mo). Ang sagot, niya it is desire and perseverance and being good at things that you do not want to do. The article coined the term "deliberate practice", meaning working on to be skillful on the things that are difficult and unpleasant to do. Deliberate practice on things you do not want to do before doing what you want to do. This is what distinguishes the ordinary from the extraordinary, like Tiger Woods.

Anyway, my christmas gift to you is a one year subscription of Fortune Magazine. Malay natin, it might inspire you to build your own fortune. Ha.ha.ha. Barat nga!

Tulog na ko!

Labs.