make the reader a gigachad with a sigma male grind set, he worships Andrew Tate, and Wally is able to turn this gigachad into a big softie…. Wally brings out the true gay out of this gigachad….
however………… have Wall-E (yes, the actual robot) try to fight for the gigachad’s love……..
Sigh... everyone... this is my friend, poo. They know nothing about Welcome Home but they read all my posts cus the homies gotta support each other. Okay poo, here's your wack ass ficlet. Enjoy.
Alpha Male Turned Gayass🍎🏳️🌈🎀
It was a day like any other, a day for posting on reddit and listening to alpha male podcasts. I was voice chatting with another dude on discord (not in a gay way though) about how terrible the new Mario movie was.
"Yeah it sucks they made Peach be all strong and stuff," I said.
"It's like, who wants a woman with any kind of agency? Next you're gonna be telling me she's a butch lesbian! If she met me I'd be able to set her straight. I bet her female brain would fall head over heels for an alpha like mys- oh, I just got a dm, hang on."
I checked the dm, from a user I'd never seen before. It said "I see you."
Then they sent a low quality and blurry picture of what looked like a pair of eyes, though it was almost too dark to tell. Couldn't even pay for nitro and send decent pictures, what a loser.
Just then, a pair of arms reached out of the screen and dragged me inside!
I didn't remember anything after that, and I woke up laying in the grass, which felt strange after not touching it for so long.
"Hello, y/n. Good to see you're awake. Sorry if you got hurt on the way here!"
I looked up to see who was talking, and saw what looked like a Jim Henson style puppet talking to me! Without anyone puppeteering!
He reached out a hand to me and grinned.
I felt my face heat up, and his pompador-ish hair and almost sleepy grin and monotone voice awoke something inside me that I had mocked all my life.
"Yeah..." I said, taking his hand and standing.
"Where am I? Who are you?" I should've been scared, but for some reason his eye contact that he maintained with me had a weirdly calming effect. It was almost hypnotic...
"Oh, I do apologize," he said gently. "This must be a very abrupt change for you. Where are my manners? Welcome to the neighborhood." He outstretched his arm, gesturing to the array of colorful houses and buildings down the hill, which I was just now noticing.
In the next few days I grew accustomed to the neighborhood, and learned its ways. I almost immediately dropped all my thoughts I'd carried with me about love, and friendship, and people in general.
I hadn't been an "alpha male." I'd been a duchebag. And I'd treated people like property. God, I felt horrible.
Wally had insisted I stay with him in his house, (which may or may not be alive...??) which I had no problem with. I wanted to get to know him as much as I could. He was... intriguing.
But there I was, under the covers of the bed, refusing to move, even though it was mid afternoon.
I heard a soft knock on the open door.
"Go away," I said without any real conviction.
I knew it wouldn't do anything, and this was confirmed when I heard footsteps and felt a presence beside me on the bed.
"What's wrong? You've been moping a lot lately. I can't help but be worried. Come on..." He said, putting his hand on me through the sheets.
I threw off the blanket and glared at him.
"Ever since you brought me here, it's been..." I searched for words, looking into Wally's eyes, who, of course, looked back with infinite patience and a gentle, kind smile.
"And what's wrong with that?"
"Everyone is honest with themselves, and is nice to each other just because. No one has to use any tactics or strategies to form or change a relationship, and it's just... I..."
I felt tears well in my eyes, and I looked away, embarrassed.
"And you're... the nicest," I whispered under my breath.
"Too nice. You've done something to me..."
I closed my eyes, but I felt fingers gently put themselves under my chin and pull me back. I met Wally's eyes, filled with understanding and kindness and something that made my heart pound until the sound of it filled my ears.
"Y/n... I don't want to be too forward with this, but I... I must come clean. I... I confess that I've developed romantic feelings for you, and I do hope you reciprocate them."
I couldn't do anything but listen to my own hearbeat for a moment, staring into his eyes, my mouth agape in disbelief.
Then, my mouth was on his. It was tender and gentle, slow and genuine. It was like birdsong and butterflies and a warm pastry. It was like sunlight in the morning and the sound of bells and the smell of chocolate.
I felt like everything was going to be okay.
(Epilog: Wall-E shows up and Wally and y/n decide to form a threesome or he just leaves or something)
There you go poo. Hope you're happy. Here's a drawing of you for the fans.
