catfishes magisters

idk what yall are mad about the new Lies Your Older Cousin Tells You machine is working great

Happy horse on mars day

basically my favorite thing to do is imagine The Character in some sort of situation of terrible emotional turmoil. it’s like enrichment for me

*turns my attention inwards* mmmmm. no *turns my attention back outwards* oh god

knights reproduce by going on epic quests together and then when the evil is vanquished a treasure chest appears with a baby swaddled in full plate armor

They aborted the Yellowstone super eruption because of woke

this is true

imagining someone in the world making use of my 4pm on a monday doodles is sick as hell

Person leaves reddit. Immediately loose virginity. More at 6.

This tale was screenshotted on reddit and became one of the site's most upvoted posts of 2024.

Having seen some births now i can say that dog birth is amazing cos they just slip n slide out one after the other like a little conveyor belt. And theyre so little and unformed. And then UNGULATE BIRTHS ... are amazing for the opposite reason which is that 10mins after being born they are filing their taxes. Unless they are goats, in which case they are committing tax fraud instead

Goats are what is called a precocial species, which means that shortly after birth they are able to do many thimgs on their own, such as standing, walking, eating, and embezzlement

ice water is awesome because you get more water in your water

important reminder that most people you follow online are significantly lamer than you think they are including me. and if you feel insecure comparing yourself to someone online: DON'T. theyre probably also lame and weird. most people on the internet are

Lady in drive through had a bearded dragon sitting on her boobs and she held it up and let me pet it. killing myself canceled