Puns&Puns

Art lectures are so drawn out I bet they pay per hour.

Seasoning food takes thyme.

When pigs fly they use helicopters.

When people order many frappucinos in one order with no tip I want to decafitate myself.

Blackbeard the infamous pirate might’ve gone a bit overboard when he pushed that guy off the ship.

A mermaid’s love would never be artifishal

Large holes are pit-iful.

If my wrists spontaneously combust. I'll be wielding fire arms.

Desks are a product I can get behind.

You can't insult a rhino, its skin is too thick.

Every runner strides for a change in pace.

Soup is always a bowl'd choice.

My brother knocked over a cup of ice water at a silent table. I said it was a great icebreaker.

Cacti are pricks

Someone got hit by a bus but it was their own fault because they looked busy.

Adult content on tumblr? Soon to be invisible to the naked eye.

If you can't make time for yourself or anyone else, don't build clocks.