copcorrupted:
whatever this has been – the hell loop, as lucifer called it – has been grueling on dan. the almost partnership he’d formed with malcolm, the way he’d use the people around him to get what he’d want and how people continued to create excuses for him to keep him off the hook until he hurt another innocent. ella, lucifer, chloe, the time he had tried to punish lucifer for a crime that he didn’t commit and ended up almost getting trixie killed because of that. though in this version of reality, his fears become actualized, the people he thought he’d wronged wound up dead, or worse. while he would plead to be properly punished his sins he instead would instead be waved off until the next atrocious thing he’d done would come to light, and have that same disgust in himself almost boil over while everyone seemed so blinded to the fact that he was a violent, selfish person and he was left to watch the same people die again and again. that pattern only ever repeated itself over, and over, and over again - and dan felt so powerless to stop himself from destroying those he loved.
it was hard to tell if lucifer was even standing in front of him now, if the information he told daniel was simply lies to create purpose for him being here… but what he said, he thinks those were all things that rang true — that lucifer was going to become god, that he’d do what was right and save the people who cares for him, and it… made a certain amount of sense that he’d return for dan, if not just to do right by trixie.
❛ i… i can’t. ❜ it may sound selfish, like he was carelessly giving into the pain despite what trixie needed, but it wasn’t. he didn’t think it was, anyhow. ❛ she’s better off without me. if i go back out there, i’ll just – i keep putting her in danger, lucifer i — i can’t do that to her… just.. please… leave me alone. ❜
That look on Dan’s face is one he’s seen all too many times. The guilty soul has no clue if his existence is real or fabricated by the loop they’re stuck in. Lucifer supposes he could have stopped the demons sooner, but they’re past that now. Holding up a hand, he looks to the visible demons with a stare they all know too well. “Stop, all of you. Take a break.” The lot of them disappear through different doorways, leaving the two alone.
Listening to the detective say how he can’t return back to Earth and his family, Lucifer’s eyes twitches in pure annoyance. However, he doesn’t want to upset him any further than he already is. “Dan. I know that you’re not entirely comfortable with Chloe and myself together, but you need to know something. I care for your little offspring, but I will never be her father. She needs you, the department needs you. We... we all need you.”
Speaking upon feelings he would rather leave buried inside himself, Lucifer hopes that his vulnerability helps to break Daniel of this negative train of thought. He never deserved to be here, but his own guilt is what put him in his own little loop. “Please, let me do this for you. Despite my newfound title as God, I am not about to against the freewill that my father gave you.”
