loading my days into burn piles!

Happy Pride

whenever I tell a story I feel like Uncle Colm from Derry Girls

London mutuals what is there to do that’s cheap and not alcohol based?

bongs at croydon

there’s a bloke at clappham common who will suck your dick for £4.50 hell even play with your balls for an extra quid

I have 0 desire to meet you let alone give you money

£3.50?

complimented a womans clear raincoat this morning and she said Well i feel like a sandwich

elvis died because it wasnt getting enough fiber

ive never fucked up someones pronouns this badly before, sorry

the human brain is so cool, if you're tired and stressed enough, your brain will go, "don't worry, I got you" and shadows will start moving

and what's the genital situation on the shadows

oh this is my post

i think its charming when peoples personal lives improve and they get drastically worse at posting

I think it's hilarious that hands down the worst way to learn magic is the actual rulebook. Please do not read that. It's just there for reference when something weird happens

posts that i know are about magic the gathering but i have to check to make sure op isn't just living in a way doper world than me

but ykw at least i'm not on mount everest. at least i'm not paying tens of thousands of dollars to slowly suffocate in a 300-person line at the gates of hell. never in my life will i have to be steered in a hypoxic stupor through the maze of poop and corpses atop mount everest. on this earth a lot of horrible things can happen to you without your permission but there are a few that you have to opt into. you can just say no thanks! and be guaranteed never to have to be on mount everest. much to be grateful for actually

still not on mount everest this morning 😌 alhamdulillah