@SomeZazz

emma compilation of that moment. you know the one.

(you can hear my quiet sobbing in the first one). 

Alyssa: *kisses her nose* yep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mr. Hawkins: are you awake?

emma compilation of that moment. you know the one.

(you can hear my quiet sobbing in the first one). 

the prom novel’s cover art is so pretty that i wanted to try my own take on it! 

Unruly hearts week

Day two: Favorite Lyric

“And nobody out there Ever gets to define The life I’m meant to lead With this unruly heart of mine!”

There are many reasons why this is my favorite line in the show:

Just in the text it self this line reflects how I view my queerness. Ultimately it’s something that belongs to me and me alone. Only I get to decide how to life my life. Then there is also this beautiful metaphor of “unruly heart”; Heart always implies love, and in a community that’s always been and still for the most part is hypersexualized being described with something that implies softness and tenderness is not only refreshing but also extremely accurate! And the unruly part of unruly heart, reflects this defiance in being gay/bi/trans whatever in a cishet society, our whole existence is deemed unruly, but we still exist and we still love no matter if it’s in a way we are not “supposed to”

Day 3: Favourite scene/musical number

Alyssa Coming Out

My favourite scene is when Alyssa comes out in front of her mother, in front of everyone. Alyssa’s coming out starts during ‘Tonight Belongs To You’

   “Mom I want you to know what’s going to happen tonight, you need                                                          to know that-”

Alyssa wants to tell her Mom that she’s gay but she just gets shot down. Maybe Mrs.Greene knows what Alyssa is going to say but she doesn’t want to accept it

Alyssa tries coming out again before she goes into the gym with her Mom. She has been watching Emma’s ‘Unruly Heart’ video over and over again and her mother gives out to her for it

                         “Aren’t you tired of watching that yet?”

The truth is, Alyssa keeps watching the video to find courage. She has expressed in the show that she can do anything, as long as Emma is by her side. Although they’re split up, Alyssa finds the courage to come out from Emma.

  “Can we talk? Things are getting really crazy. We have to talk about   what’s really going on here. We can’t keep avoiding this just because it’s                 uncomfortable. I love you and the stupid thing is-”

Once again Alyssa is stopped. Her Mom knows what she is trying to say but she won’t let her.

“You just don’t understand, this is not who you really are. Whatever you’re    feeling right now is because of those people. They’re putting these ideas                                                  in your head”

Alyssa finally breaks and says she doesn’t want to be apart of her Mom’s shit anymore. This scene leads into when she finally comes out, with no one stopping her.

“Mom you have to stop talking for a minute and listen ok? Mom just listen.   People don’t turn gay, they are who they are. I know how you were raised   but the world is a different place now. It’s not great but it’s better because   of people who have the courage to be themselves, people like her. I don’t   want to hurt you, I don’t want to hurt anyone I just want to be me. So here                       it goes. I LOVE YOU EMMA NOLAN”

Alyssa shouts that final line out loud for everyone to hear. She finally felt able to be herself. This scene means a lot to me because I understand how Alyssa feels. I understand wanting to be myself but not wanting to disappoint anyone in the process. Alyssa’s fear of anyone finding out about her is so clear throughout the whole show, but she does it. She manages to come out. And not just to her mother. To everyone. She lets everyone know who she is and who she loves. This scene makes me so proud and makes me cry at the same time, every time.