Don't Stop Believing

I can hear my kid playing supermarket by herself and she’s telling all the customers that they are disgusting and they need to leave

And she's right

apparently my boss who is a professor at my school doesn’t have a cell phone and his coworkers were upset by this so they bought him a childs toy phone and labeled it “David’s jitterbug” (for those of you that don’t know jitterbugs are phones made for old people that have like massive buttons and shit) so the other day I walked into his office to ask him a question and he pressed a button on it which made it start loudly playing the ABCs and he said “excuse me I have to take this” and then started singing along to the ABCs while shooing me out of his office

The sound of heavy rain while you are in bed.

the overwhelming small dick energy of this post is making me break out in hives

* wants attention but also uncomfortable with attention *

my type: people who get excited about rainy nights

i hate when its night time we’re supposed to go to bed…. like did u not realize that 1am-5am are the funnest times to be awake? why is it weird to sleep during the daytime nd do things at night? vampire rights!

idk why wearing someone else’s shirt or sweater or jacket is so satisfying and comforting but it is

I want to be unafraid. I want to be full of light and love and kindness. I want to go on adventures and rejoice in the beauty of living.

today a kid at work climbing up a tree felt the need to tell his friend “this tree is for ONLY BOYS and GIRLS”. so obviously his friend was like um that means it’s for everyone, to which i responded “some people aren’t boys or girls!” and the boy climbing the branch added his hot take of “YEAH! some people are PIRATES.”

basing a foreign speaker’s intelligence on how fluent they are in a foreign language is so ignorant

As my dad always says, “Anyone who speaks with an accent knows one more language than you.”

One thing nobody tells you about adulthood is how lonely it can be. Everyone is always working full time, your schedules never work around each other, and it becomes harder to make solid friendships. It’s no wonder so many people stay in boring or shitty relationships because at least you have someone to do things with. I’ve lately discovered the joys of doing things myself because I couldn’t just wait around for my friends to clear their schedules and I’ll be damned if I get into a bad relationship out of loneliness