prince of nonsense

Hey, everyone; I'm sorry to be asking for help again, but it's that time. While I currently have an extremely limited and unreliable source of income to help with covering food and medicine (and I don't know how long that will remain viable), I'm still deep in the red mentally, physically, and financially. I wish I had been able to make this post with more of a runup to the deadline, but my current housing situation is extremely poorly equipped to handle the heat wave this area is experiencing, and I've been battling the resulting illness just to stay conscious a fair amount of the time.

For those who are unfamiliar with my story, more in-depth explanations of what has gone down up to this point are available here. To summarize the important parts:

I am a severely disabled queer trans person with long COVID, living in poverty after escaping a series of abusive living situations involving neglectful caretakers, physical and emotional abuse, financial and sexual exploitation, and domestic violence. The most recent of these, which I escaped earlier this year after a murder attempt which the law did nothing about, was my family who have mostly cut ties with me since.

I have almost no income, and since my escape have been living out of Airbnbs with the help of donations online. I have been trying to get into a more stable housing situation and apply for disability for quite a while now, but have been met with walls and obstacles at every turn; right now I am simply trying to a place where I don't have to lose sleep over where I'm planning to sleep next month, let alone how to pay for it.

My current housing is not safe for me to keep living in, for the reasons I mentioned as well as many others. I can't leave before July 26th, but if I can raise the money to return to my previous Airbnb--which, despite not being perfect, isn't Literally Falling Apart, and has a relatively trustworthy host who likes me and only ended our first tenancy due to a genuine misunderstanding--I will be back in a house with actual functioning A/C and plumbing, where strangers are not constantly cycling in and out in large numbers with little accountability for bad behavior, and where my host is not constantly trying to trick me out of hundreds or thousands of dollars.

I have severe autoimmune-induced nerve damage, including spinal injuries, and cannot drive, use any software not accessible from mobile, hold a steady job, or safely leave the house. I have to be extremely careful about even what position it's safe to lie down in without causing myself further injury, and because of this--combined with long-term abuse, neglect, food insecurity, and illness--I am severely weak and atrophied. I may have at least one abdominal hernia as a result, though jesus christ I really fucking hope not lol

The autoimmune aspect of my condition is extremely heat-sensitive, and my health spirals rapidly when I am too hot for too long. Not only does this cause pain, brain fog, and worsening nerve damage, it makes me prone to severe, dangerous repeat infections that have already caused me lingering lung damage and hearing loss. I am also extremely vulnerable to heat exhaustion and heat stroke, especially with the medication I am on to control the inflammation.

There is a horrendous heat wave going on where I live, and with the timing it will almost certainly segue straight into one of our godawful summers with no reprieve. We're talking regular heat indexes of 96°F with humidity that has not gone below 70% at very minimum for weeks straight. It's really fucking bad, y'all. I am terrified at the idea of being trapped outside when I am already struggling this much indoors.

All of this together is to say that if I am unhoused for even a day or two, I will almost certainly die or suffer serious, permanent injury, including loss or impairment of my ability to walk or use the bathroom unassisted. I do not have the ability to carry my belongings with me, either, so being unhoused for even one day will almost certainly mean losing everything I own and starting over. I absolutely cannot afford to do this. If it happens I am fucked.

The expenses I am currently trying to cover, in order of urgency:

$800 (the amount of this month's rent that I do not currently have, and do not foresee raising by June 10th without help. This is the top priority.)

$800 (first month's rent for the other place, which is due at time of booking. If I wait too long to do this, it may end up booked out from under me for months again.)

$150 (replacing the cushion of grocery money I've been lucky enough to build up for this month, which is currently earmarked for rent)

$190 (rent for the remainder of my stay in the current place, due July 10th)

$800 (rent for my second month at the other place; I am really hoping I won't be expected to start paying this before I've even arrived for the first month, but all my efforts to figure out how the fuck the payment scheduling works have failed, so better safe than sorry. May be due July 10th)

$130 (the rest of my grocery money for this month, which I may or may not be able to cover myself especially since I may have to start paying my own phone bill soon)

Every donation helps, and I am so unbelievably thankful to everyone who has helped me get this far. As hard as this year has been, and as hard as this summer will be if I live through it, I am alive because of you all, and for the very first time in my 30 years of life I am not actively being abused. I am struggling but I am still fighting, and I am so grateful for the opportunity to keep working toward a better life for myself instead of dying on the street.

pypl: manymogs

The bad news is that someone has booked another month out from under me at the other place at the last second. 🥲 The good news is that a) we're very close to making the goal for first month's rent at that place, b) it turns out that they will indeed not start charging more payments for that place after the first one until October, and c) once it has been booked I shouldn't have to worry about searching for places again until May of next year at the earliest.

The place I'm in currently is, to put it mildly, a hellhole full of mice with a locked thermostat and plumbing that is painful to use and has already flooded my room once. I really do not want to know how bad it will be during winter, please help me get out of here 🥲

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Goal list, restructured again in order of urgency:

$890 (first month's rent at other place)

$950 (next month's rent at current place, now that I'll be staying here longer; I won't have an exact number until I extend my stay with the host, but this is the safest amount to assume it will be. Due July 10th)

$150 (to replace the grocery/medicine money I'm putting into the upcoming rent payment)

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pypl: manymogs

I've found another place nearby with much better reviews for the same cost; if I can raise rent for that place before someone else books the gap, I will be able to get out of this house two months earlier than otherwise, and spend two of the hottest months of the year in a less dangerous environment while I'm waiting for the longer stay to become available. If worst comes to worst, I can use that money to extend my stay here instead.

Thank you all so, so much for your help so far, every bit makes a difference and it will be so much easier to get on my feet when I'm not constantly stressing out about having to potentially arrange yet another place to stay in a few weeks.

Edit: Traction on this has been slowing down, and while I'm incredibly grateful for the assistance I've gotten so far, I do still need help; to that end, if you donate and send me a screenshot of having done so, I will send you a doodle of your choice in return. I have limited spoons and equipment for this, so the results may not be fancy and for that I apologize, but I need to get out of here sooner than later and I'm happy to give back what I can to make that happen.

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pypl: manymogs

All donations after that will for now go toward putting together enough money for my next grocery order; if I can scrape this much together, I will be out of the immediate zone of urgency for donations for this month. This house is a mouse-infested nightmare where the other guests routinely scream and throw things at each other, steal my food, flood the bathrooms, and run the oven for hours at a time during 100°F+ weather, all of which the host does very little about, and it is not safe for me to stay here longer than absolutely necessary.

Please help me past this last hurdle, I am so so close thanks to all of your help so far and I need to get out.

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pypl: manymogs

For now other donations will go toward covering groceries and bills for the month, but once I have enough to cover my next grocery trip (usually about $35-$50) it should be much less urgent to cover it all as fast as possible. Thank you all

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It's currently close to 4 AM now that I'm posting this, and I've been crying non-stop since midnight because my friends came back online one by one through an unstable connection and said: "Hi, I'm alive." I had prepared myself for the funeral of so many of my friends. Some haven't come back online yet, and we've formed small "search and rescue" groups to find their contacts or families to check if they're okay.

What remains a fact amidst all of this is that nobody in the world ever gave a single fuck about us. I was one of the lucky ones to connect during the complete shutdown via some newly invented way we were too scared to even publish on GitHub for fear of getting arrested. In the time I was connected, I felt immense guilt for having access to the internet, and I begged you all on my socials to be the voice of the people who were about to get executed.

Not even once did I see someone talk about the internet blackout in Iran, and it enrages me.

We've been massacred, mass executed, and then silenced by getting our only way of communicating with the world shut off and the world treats it as some background noise, some irrelevant news that isn't even worth spending time hearing about.

I love Minecraft, and I love BNHA, so I've been thinking of an AU where Class 1-A would have their own SMP they play on together.

I created a little list of what I think their play-styles/ focuses would be like down below:

Izuku

Probably has been playing since he was 10, overjoyed when he has friends in Class 1-A to play with on multiplayer

Definitely a huge nerd about the game, knows all about different game mechanics, easter eggs (i.e. jeb_ & dinnerbone), lore, etc.

I'd imagine he would be a redstoner, given how analytical he is and how he's able to problem-solve & think outside the box

Bakugo

Complains about being "forced" to play with Izuku, but secretly enjoys it

Big focus on combat/ PVP

Becomes the unofficial "leader" of the server (At first I thought he would be more aggressive and uncooperative, someone who constantly pick fights. But I like the idea of him being stern and brash, but determined to make sure everyone succeeds. I think it fits his character development a lot better.)

Normally he's calm (or as calm as he can be), but he loses his absolute sh*t whenever someone pranks him, no matter how small the prank is (I just find the idea funny :3)