Hσρє Ɛѕтнєιм

not even hope’s words summoned memories—there was still that vast gap between memories, not wholly empty, but transparent; even if he could feel it pulse, even if it felt cloaked in energy. that was where the images were lost, where only emotion reigned and small tidbits of routine still threaded into his bones.

but he listened, tried to recall, but effort didn’t translate to success, only further confusion. he narrowed his eyes, furrowed his brows, and tightened his lips around each of his words; though, even then, noel looked helpless.

❝ this can’t be true. i–i don’t even know a serah. i—there was no one else but me; i had lost yeul, caius. that’s all there was–all i can remember. … why should i believe you? ❞

They’d barely even spoken a few words to each other and yet Hope felt as though he’d gone three rounds in a fight and he was on the losing end. It was disheartening to know that his friend no longer had a single recollection of him. “It is true… I have no reason to lie to you. We just… met...” it felt wrong, those words. They left a bitter taste in his mouth, because to Hope, the hadn’t just met, they’d been close for a long time, yet the wedge between them seemed to be growing further still and he was at a loss for how to bridge the gap.

“I…” sliding a hand back through silver tresses, disappointment unlike he’d ever felt before, washed over him in waves. He wished he could will the memories into Noel’s mind, force him to recall his own history and that’s when it struck him. Just how sad it would be not to remember ones past… he knew because he’d been there too. Not to Noel’s extent, but he’d experienced the emptiness that came with not knowing who you truly were.

surprise and confusion deepened their reach, expanded until they were too swollen for his body, too large to contain; the tips of his fingers trembled, though he curled them up, tightened them into a fist—fought off a poignant breaking with strength, with anchored feet and narrowed eyes. only the corner of his lips quivered, surrendered itself to emotion.

❝ i never went on a travel. ❞ he said, repeated himself with little grace. ❝ where do you know me from, hope? ❞

“Oh but you did…” Hope refuted the claim, voice devoid of the emotion the masculine timbre once held. Noel didn’t remember him; it hurt. He’d expected his friends to recognise him should they cross paths again, but something had happened along the way, appropriating Noel’s recollection of the silver haired male.

☺

“You know, if you just closed your eyes instead of staring up and me and talking, you might make some progress in actually falling asleep,” Hope grinned down at the brunet as he carded nimble fingers through soft, auburn locks, his cyan eyes following the movement of his hand. “It’s not like I’m anything interesting to look at… I mean, I’m hardly doing… this!” Sticking his tongue out from between his lips, Hope cocked his head a fraction to the right and crossed his eyes in an attempt to amuse Noel. If the brunet wouldn’t sleep, he’d at least laugh. His smile was warm and inviting, Hope had always thought so.

“Thish ish my pwetty face,” he squeezed out from betweenlips sealed around the pink muscle as his tongue wagged helplessly before his expression relaxed as he schooled his features and it was almost as though the entire event hadn’t occurred. His stoic demeanour was firmly back in place, however the playful gleam in his eyes remained while they retrained on the males, his head rested on the silverette’s lap, curtain of auburn framing his handsome face.

“Now sleep, before I cover your eyes with my hands and don’t let go until you’re off to the land of nod!” Hope’s threat wasn’t entirely empty. He had every intention of following through should Noel remain awake, staring up at him and talking about things that simply went way over Hope’s head; fishing for example was one of them, along with how to cast the perfect net and catch the maximum amount of fish with said net.

♣

The blonde looked lost and upset, the tears making trails down his otherwise peachy and unblemished cheeks, testament to that. Although, having said that, the other did appear to have some kind of marks, marring his skin, leaving deep lines across pallid cheeks. Perhaps that was why he was upset. Maybe someone had hurt him.

“Hey now… there is no need to cry,” Hope approached slowly, his movements careful and precise so as not to startle the stranger. He refused to stand by and become an audience to someone who looked as broken as the blonde did. It wasn’t in the professor’s nature to disregard someone as crestfallen as the other.

“Do you need to talk about things?” he inquired softly, lifting a hand to gently swipe deft fingers across the high arch of the other males cheekbone, wiping through the warm tears trickling from his lashes and removing any trace of the strangers upset, at least momentarily. “You can talk to me… I’m Hope… and perhaps I could give you some.”

♋ 

Hope wasn’t one for catering to others when it came to things of a culinary nature, but he decided to make an exception for the woman, appearing so frail before the silverette. “I hope you like pasta…” he spoke to the other, tonal quality lilted with a playful edge. He stirred the contents of the pot, concentrating as he dragged and swirled the wooden spatula through the soft and cooked shells within the container before plating up.

The professor added the warm tomato sauce over the pasta then dropped a small handful of basil onto the dish, ensuring it both looked artful and delicious. “Voila,” the male smiled as he held the bowl out towards the female with both hands, offering up the food as a gesture of friendship and comfort for the other who appeared to be in desperate need of both.

he matched the other’s steps with his own, rebuilt the distance that collapsed, sought safety in space. something clattered in his memory, a faint sound that, instead of telling him about the man in front of him, instead of filling in gaps, only pointed toward the emptiness. ❝ no, i haven’t been hurt, but i still got no clue as to who you are. ❞  he told him, head shaking. it couldn’t be true: back at home, he’d been the only one alive. ❝ hope–where do you know me from?  ❞

Crestfallen, dejection sought to furrow a crease into Hope’s brow as he lifted despondent eyes, searching his old friends for any hints of mischievous pretence, but he found none and it concerned the silverette. “You really… don’t know me, do you?” he mused quietly in a rushed whisper under his breath, his gaze fixed on the brunet’s before him. “But… how? Were your memories wiped on the particular travel that brought you here?” 

shock quivered up his spine, rang with surprise and disbelief after the stranger mentioned him by name. his lips pressed together as he blinked, took a few moments to gather himself; soon his brows furrowed, expression tightened as he stared at that face: so familiar, but so distant. ❝ how do you know my name? where else would i be? who are you? ❞

His brow furrowed, eyebrows knitting together as confusion clouded the silverette’s cyan eyes; Noel didn’t recognise him? How could that be? They’d been so close. “You... don’t know me?” Narrowing the distance between them by a couple of unsure steps, Hope studied his friends eyes, gazing at him as though this were the first time they’d ever met. “It’s me... Hope. What happened to you, did someone hurt you?!” 

❝  i just think of the last sunburn i had; then it doesn’t seem so heavy–fabric is a lot lighter than pain. ❞

That masculine timbre was so familiar to Hope, stunning him into momentary silence, recognition washing over him like a wave as he turned and looked into deep blue eyes that he knew so well. “N-Noel... you’re here too?” 

‘So tired… so tired…’ Hope mused silently, lifting his weary head and scanning the waterline with warm, cyan eyes, admiring the gentle lap of the waves along the edge of the golden carpet, spread out around him. He had papers to grade, but it could wait, lackadaisical and harbouring a desire to dive on into the ocean and take a long, soothing swim, Hope bided his time, postponing his objective until the beach was a little less crowded. There was someone nearby, he could hear them, but their being was obscured by the jagged rocks at his side. It was only one person, but one was enough to cause Hope to suspend the idea until they left, lest he be witnessed in his underwear, a discomfiture he wished to avoid.

Hope sat on the grass, his back resting against a large oak tree and his book bag settled on his lap. It was way too warm today, causing the platinum haired male to tug off his shirt and toss it to the ground at his side. He was uncaring about being left in nothing more than a rather fitted vest top that clung to his lean torso.  "Man, it is too warm. I'm melting!" Hope exclaimed, catching the attention of a nearby student, making their way towards the dorm building.