Welcome To Mystery

I always am about to go to sleep at a beautiful 11pm and then something happens to me

WORTH SOUND

asked one of my coworkers how she's doing today and she goes "could be better, could be worse," and another coworker nearby who was eavesdropping chimes in with "could be a lil bit o' alligator curse!" i have no idea what he meant by that but i do know that it has been immediately added to the lexicon.

New York is the exact opposite of Minnesota. New York is where the Big Apple is and Minnesota is where Minneapolis

JEFF WE TALKED ABOUT THIS.

phone in bed time save me.. phone in bed time… save me phone in bed time

Logging onto here is like walking through a bead curtain

every day i am thankful to ancient humans for the domestication of the cat. fucking genius idea. agriculture was a good one too btw but you really outdid yourselves with the cat thing

not to be a slut but can u come gently rub my back

Always suck your girl’s tits. Always.

Need someone to come play with my hair before I fall asleep.