Potato Rants

When I started doing my taxes I was like “why do people hate doing their taxes? You get money back??? Now I get it. I understand now.

There’s something that’s been on my mind lately… If gender is a construct, then being trans would be a result of social environment, no? I’ve heard arguments that there’s a genetic factor as well but I haven’t heard any studies to back it up. Personally, I don’t believe in altering your body to feel comfortable. Hair and clothes are one thing but getting surgery and physically destroying and rebuilding what you were born with feels wrong. You shouldn’t need to alter your body to feel comfortable. Just because I didn’t like my figure for a long time doesn’t mean I’m trans. I feel like a lot of people are seeking out a permanent solution to a temporary problem. There is something in our society called body dysmorphia and it is certainly not exclusive to trans people. I feel like if you’re feeling negative about your body- like you’re not comfortable in your own skin- then you should get the help you need. Therapy would probably be the first step. A therapist neutral on the subject would probably be best- that way you wouldn’t be swayed one way or the other. If, after attending therapy regularly for at least a year, then you should be informed enough to go through with any procedure you wish. My biggest concern about this whole ordeal is that CHILDREN are making these decisions and their parents are just LETTING them! If we can all agree that you must be a legal adult to do certain things (drive, drink, smoke, rent a car, get a house) then WHY are we left children make life-altering decisions? I’m 18 and I still don’t think I’m informed enough to make a decision like that. While, yes, adults can do as they please and they can ruin their bodies if they’d like, I am begging that the decision is an informed one!!! Some of these procedures and medications will make people infertile!!! This decision is often times irreversible and we’re just letting everyone do as they please! While I believe in supporting your children in their passions, I also believe in getting help when you need it. It is imperative to analyze every available option and course of action before diving into the most popular one that could potentially ruin your life. Thinking like this is what saved me from myself. People are not perfect. I am not perfect. No one is perfect!!! We are people and people are flawed. I want our next generation to be strong and independent, but I also don’t want them to feel like they have to change who they are to be happy. The world is a scary place right now and it’s only getting worse.

I'm doing the self-paced ACT course. The site shut down today due to a maintenance check. Now, I've been working on this along with homework assignments since about 9:30 this morning. I took about an hour break for food, a nap, and maybe 15 minutes of an episode of a show I enjoy before I was like "I need to get back to work." It is now almost 7:00 pm when I started typing this. I talked to a counselor about college (even though I already had a plan in place). She told me if I scored at least a 26 on the ACT and a GPA of 3.5 I could get 2 year's worth of college completely paid for. I looked today and it's only a 3.0. I feel like I was stressing for nothing now. I scored the exact 26 I needed on the first practice test, but felt like I still wasn't doing well enough. Even after I found out I only needed a 3.0, I felt like I needed to do more. I'm not sure if other people have the same issue with school or if it's just something I personally struggle with. I never feel like I'm doing enough and even if I try my hardest, I seem to get a lower grade than I wanted. It always seems to be the assignments I don't try on that I get 100 on. I want to be more carefree about my assignments, but I feel like if I loosen my grip I'll lose hold of it all. I'm late on my period and my dad suggested it was due to stress. I know there's really nothing for me to stress over now, but I feel like I need to do better. I want to get a job so I can have an income, but due to extracurriculars for school, it's difficult. I'm stressed over fixing my car and making payments for a trip I want to go on. There's so much to do and pay for that it's making me frustrated that I can't do it myself. I don't like relying on unreliable people like my mom to help me with stuff like this. I feel like I'm losing control over my life and I can't find a way to regain it. I know I'm struggling now and it won't last forever. I know I'm doing good enough and I am good enough, but I feel like I need to do better. I'm slowly falling apart and I'm not sure how to put myself back together. Moving in with my dad is going to give me the freedom and privacy I need to be myself, but I'm relying on an event that could possibly turn sour. Though I hate to admit it, I hold my mom's opinion in high esteem. Right now, I just want to sleep. Goodnight all. I hope life is well to you, spuds.

So, after yesterday it has come to my attention how emotional people can truly be. While I was in my modern US class we had a talk about what happened. Let me tell you- we all need to learn emotional control as a country and a society. ESPECIALLY people in power. We are a society that believes we should be able to do what you want when you want and it's great to be free and do what you want but rules and regulations are required for a stable society. Emotional control is not of these rules but I personally believe it should be a very strong recommendation- especially for presidents. Now, Trump did not actively tell his followers to destroy and harm people but he also wasn't actively trying to stop them. This, to me, feels much more like dodging a bullet. If I was able to vote I'd want someone who has the emotional control to handle the stress of presidency and think about things logically, despite political party, and have the motives to help better our country. Presidency should not be determined by political party, rather the character and motives of the candidate. Democratic and republican parties are constantly in the lead for votes and tend to overshadow the third party and we never seem to hear their campaign. Or at least I don't. I've heard many times that the 2 party system is ruining our country and I believe it's true. If we looked at the character and moral values of our candidates rather than a recognizable name or party we might just have better luck with presidents. Of course, people lie and cheat their way to the top so you won't be able to tell if they're lying or not until their presidency.

So, what I'm seeing is someone blaming race problems on white people, which I believe is in fact racist. I know, it's crazy, you can be racist to white people. It's a thing. I actually looked it up and the amount of whites that rape is much larger than other races. Great, that part is true. BUT you cannot say all whites don't experience the same situations as other races. And if you want to bring up stats- blacks or african americans have the highest murder charges and robbery. You also have to keep in mind, though, that a majority of the convicted criminals are white. It's like being the only black person in a group of about 4 or 5 people. 2 of those people are white and one of them doesn't like you because of your race. Of course you call them racist and naturally believe the other white person is racist because you're all in the same group. Now, I'm not saying that no one is racist- a lot of people are. But a lot of people live here. Now, if we calculated a ratio of which side does more crime they would probably be hovering around the same number. Whites make up around 69% of crimes. African Americans make up 27.4%. Other races are all less than 5%. THIS DOES NOT MEAN WHITES ARE EVIL AND THE OTHER RACES ARE SAINTS!!!! You have to look at the ratio of how many are convicted of crimes to the crime they have committed That is how you solve for the ratio of a specific crime, such as rape. In my opinion, that is the only true way to compare numbers. 0.24% of white convicts were charged with rape. About 0.25% of african american convicts were charged with rape. OH WHOOPTY DOO THEY'RE ABOUT THE SAME!! You see what I mean? It isn't about race, we're all people. The number of whites is just larger because the population of whites is larger. If you look at ratios you can tell exactly what the percentage is. I AM NOT SAYING THIS IS WHAT YOU SHOULD JUDGE A RACE OFF OF!!!! Do NOT use my post to try to win a race argument. I'm not on either side of it myself. I see people as people and if they fuck up then that's a personal problem for them. If I were to be sexually harassed by an african american (which I have) it does not mean I see all african american men as sexual predators. Because I don't. It was one guy who did that to me and that is no reason to judge his entire race. End of rant.