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@pookyhorse

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Some ape characters as watership down rabbits
Space Jockey Chair - by Ben Procter & H.R. Giger [18fps]
1978 / 2011
Prometheus
Prometheus/Alien: Covenant fan art by Michael Broussard

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Matthew Hogben
Death by beater bar?
Everything below is posted with liberty and credit to Jemima Harrison and the PDE blog, with the sole purpose for this information to spread as far as possible.
Time to get tough
It is⌠⢠soon to be 10 years since Pedigree Dogs Exposed ⢠five years since The Advisory Council on the Welfare Issues of Dog Breeding highlighted the issues linked to head conformation in brachycephalic breeds ⢠18 months since the publication of research (funded by the kennel club) spelling out the link between stenosis (pinched nostrils) and respiratory issues, especially in French Bulldogs ⢠a year since a veterinary petition demanding urgent reform for flat-faced dogs ⢠almost a year since the Kennel Club set up the Brachcycephalic Breeds Working Group in response to that petition .. and of course I have highlighted the issue of pinched nostrils endlessly here on this blog. Endlessly.
And yet⌠the picture at the top is one the Kennel Club has used as the ideal depiction of the French Bulldog in its new edition (2017) of its Illustrated Breed Standards. And it isnât a one-off. Hereâs the one the KC has used for the Boston Terrier standard.
The Bulldog.
And the Pug.
Dogs are as near-as-damn-it obligate nose breathers. And even if they can supplement by mouth-breathing when they are awake, they are unable to do so when they are asleep, meaning thousands of these dogs live lives of interrupted sleep as they have to wake up in order to not asphyxiate. Study after study has shown that these dogs pay the price for not being able to pull in a decent lungful of air and that starts with the nostrils. These pictures are all the proof you need that the Kennel Club is not taking this issue seriously; that at its very core the KC is paying nothing more than lip-service to the demands for reform by the veterinary profession and animal welfare campaigners. At one of the first meetings of the Brachycephalic Breeds Working Group, then KC Chairman Steve Dean expressly said that he didnât want âchanging the breed standardsâ to be at the top of everyoneâs list of actions that could be taken. And indeed, it hasnât been. There have been some new measures. Â The KC continues to fund brachy research. There is also now a brachy learning resource available on the KC website, the promise of better education of judges and a breed club commitment to educate better about the importance of keeping brachycephalics slim. There are also now health schemes for the Bulldog, French Bulldog and the Pug which do test for respiratory issues. All this is welcome. But, bottom line, the Kennel Club continues to bat for the breeders who do not want the basic phenotype to change because itâs the breeders that pay their wages. Of course the simplest, quickest remedy is to give these dogs back some muzzle - to help not just with breathing issues, but to help protect their eyes from trauma and to give their teeth some room in their overcrowded mouths (a Pug here compared to an Australian Shepherd).
The problem is that breeders are wedded to flat faces, particularly in Pugs and Bulldogs. They talk about the perfect âlaybackâ - which essentially means that the nose should not interrupt the line between the forehead and tip of the dogâs chin. In fact, thereâs a new book out on the Pug head (yours for only $159) which reminds everyone that the word Pug comes from the latin for âfistâ and that this is the shape the Pugâs head should be in profile - i.e. totally flat.
Hereâs a reminder from a top UK show breeder of what the Bulldogâs head should look like.
As you can see, a  protruding nose or a less severe underbite is considered a fault.
There was a big review of breed standards following Pedigree Dogs Exposed but it was mostly to add vague qualifiers such as, in the Pug standard, Â "relatively" short rather than just short when describing the length of the muzzle. This gives the breeders way too much wiggle room. Â We need proper metrics - a defined minimum skull/head/muzzle ratio and we need to find more profound ways to change their minds about what constitutes their breed in their eyes.
Large open nostrils are a requirement in brachy breed standards, but this is widely ignored because other points of the breed are considered more important. There would be outrage if a Frenchie with one lop ear or a Bulldog with a liver-coloured nose won in the show-ring, but dogs with slits for nostrils continue to be made up to champions.
Meanwhile, on my CRUFFA group, whenever you post a picture of more moderate examples of the breed, current of historical, the breeders heap scorn. A few days ago, one breeder insisted that the dog featured in this famous painting of a Pug by Carl Reichert, dating from the late 19th century, was a crossbreed.
Same for these ones. Mongrels, the lot of them.
She admitted that the eye-white showing was undesirable but preferred the look of this Crufts dog.
Today, this was posted on a public Facebook page by one French Bulldog breeder in response to a plea by vets for more moderate dogs.
(My bolding below)
To those who say you cannot rebuild Rome in a day I say⌠rubbish. There are already more moderate versions of these breeds out there being bred by breeders more interested in health than the current fashion.Â
For more than 10 years, I have called for moderation and hoped it would come from the breeders. But  I now know it wonât. If we want anything more than a wee bit of tweaking round the edges, then we need to demand it.
It is time to get tough. These dogs suffer - not all of them all the time but too many of them too often.Â
Brachycephalics live a third less long than non-brachy dogs. Fifty per cent have significant airway disease. Almost all struggle to cool themselves. Most Bulldogs still canât mate or give birth naturally. Pugs have 19 times the risk of developing corneal ulcers. Â All suffer from very low genetic diversity. And so on.
Today, Bulldogs, French Bulldogs and Pugs make up one in five of the dogs registered with the Kennel Club - up from one in 50 in 2005.
Yesterday, a new petition was launched asking for a ban on brachycephalics. Â Over 20k people signed it in the first 24 hrs.
Have we reached a tipping point? Â With your help.
I havenât been able to blog much recently because I am busy finishing off a television series for BBC2. But I have taken time out to write this because the new breed standard pictures made me so angry.
So please⌠Although itâs moderation I want, not a ban, sign the petition. Make your feelings known to the Kennel Club (see here). Complain if brands or media use generic pictures of brachycephalics to sell their wares.
Vets: thank you so much for all that you are now doing, but please keep the pressure on.
And, of course, to everyone out there - please donât buy that puppy.
It is not safe to buy a Pug, Bulldog or French Bulldog. Not safe for them and not safe for your wallet.
For kindofblueeyes. Goblin!

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im screaming once I was just staring at myself for 5 minutes convincing myself that i wasnt that drunk then i threw up and was like must of been the food i ate
ME LMAO
This is exactly how physics does not work.
Why didnât she just use the lipstick on the door?Â
IM FUAKCING DYING I CANNTO DO THIS IM CRYING TEARS. REAL TEARS.
WILL SOMEONE PLEASE ADD THE GIF OF SCOOBY DOO WITH THE TRASH CAN LIDS TO THIS POST
Oh, wow.
Yâall not gonna come for Totally Spies like this
Conquering an artblock
Donât mind me!

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âI see. Things are different around here, arenât they?â Tobi says.
He breathes deeply through his nose. The scent of the forest and of rain were on the breeze, light and subtle. He loves the rain.
âIf only i could show you the jungle during the rain. It is a beautiful sight. If course, even we are not in the jungle anymore. How I miss it⌠You know, I know that worry as well. That someone is lusting after my position, even If they have no regard for its responsibility. I donât know if they are well founded or not. I suppose it is still inside us. But for you I imagine it wonât happen. Your father seems to be an idol for these apes. Many of them would not want to betray his sacrifice or his memory, I think.â
âHe was and Iâll never be him. Though many wish or think I am. They treasure my bloodline and kept my fatherâs promise that I wouldnât forget who he was and what he did. Itâs been my burden since I was two. But things, even if I donât always notice it. Are improving. But I canât grow complacent. Thatâs when they go for your throat.â Cornelius ducked his head back inside as soon as he felt rain drops hit his pale muzzle. He sat back down with his wives as they groomed his tense body. Most apes were napping at this point.
âYes⌠I know that very well. I cannot allow myself to be distracted on day from my duties. Cookie and Juliana say I need a break. I trust in them of course, but I always need to be available to do what I need to do. I hope I leave a lagacy, but in truth i only care for the tribe,â Tobi says. He holds a hand out to the rain starting to dribble.
He notices some movement nearby. He steps outside and looks about to see his tribe members outside. Juliana grins slightly at him and moves in for a hug they both share.
âWe found coffee beans and sugar. We found some chocolate bars as well. We didnât find anything else preserved,â She signs.
âThat is fine, Juliana. You did well,â He gestures back.
He pokes his head back inside.
âCornelius, my compadres are back. They must have noticed the clouds moving in,â he says
âThatâs good. The storms here are long..â Cornelius eyed their human food. He wondered if it was even good,being itâs at least a dozen years since the humans made their last meals. âWell if you need to rest.â The rugs werenât moved, so they could lay down if they wanted to. To keep himself together during this unwelcome weather he took up grooming Wispâs thighs, he secretly thought she had the most plump.
âAt least the little demons are asleep now.â Cornelius murmured with a light smile. Now he could focus on the rain drops.
âWould you like to prepare for storm festivities?â Juliana asks Tobi.
Tobi looks at Cornelius.
âI suppose that is up to them,â Tobi says.
âDo you have drums?â Tobi asks Cornelius
Cornelius shrugged. Rain dance? That was something the bonobos liked to do. They seemed to love the water. Him? He didnât mind a peaceful bath but he didnât practically drown himself in it like a bon does..
âWe do. I have some here you could use. Most chimps here are pretty mopey about rain..but the bonobos love it. They party. Well they party about everything.â
The chimpsâ eyes light up. Drums, human chocolate, coffee and cocoa. This may not be on the scale they usually have, but they could make it work. Tobi isnât quite sure what a âBonoboâ is, though.
âHow will i know these⌠Bonobos? Where can I find them?â He asks.
âOh youâll know them. Theyâre our cousins. The females outrank their males. They yeep instead of hoot and the females have big beautiful pink rumps. And they fuck a lot..everyday, all day..â Cornelius scratched his chin, feeling a bit excited. He had a few hoot-yeep childrenâŚsurely. His wives huffed at him. âThere over there, closer to the waterâs edge. Hard to miss. They love it.. the matriarch is called Zarnha..â
Tobi becomes excited. Apes who like pleasures as much as he does? This is sure to be a good time.
âExcellent! Do they have their own drums or should we find the ones you have?â
âOh they have everything they need to party.â Cornelius smiled, eyeing his wives briefly. Maybe he could escort the guests to the bonobo side of town. NoâŚthey were too smart. He could never fool them. âTheir instruments are a bit different from ours. Less rough and crude I guess you could say. Some chimps like it and some donât..â
Tobi scratches his chin.
âYou say their instruments are more refined, huh? Maybe they are as good or better than ours. We shall go find them at once. Are you sure you do not want to come?â
Cornelius sighed, he wasnât a lover of rain. It dampened his mood. âMaybe laterâŚâ *if the sex Is good* he though to himself. His own family was settled down for a nap and expected him too as well. Theyâd only get anxious if he went off to party. Especially since they knew how he was with storms.
âVery well,â Tobi says, âWhich direction should we head? I do not know your homeland as well as you do.â
âTobi, I have been mapping out the land. I believe i know where to look,â Juliana interjects.
Tobi nods and looks at Cornelius.
âThen we are off. I hope you enjoy your nap. You have such a lovely family,â he says.
Tobi waves them off and had Juliana lead them toward the Bonobos, taking care not to seem aggressive as they all travel in one group.
Cornelius watched them wander off. What a strange bunchâŚparty in the rain. A storm no less. Itâs just mood dampening! Perhaps if youâre raised with celebrating storms but it wasnât a tradition here. But he didnât feel tired so he just watched the scenery instead.
Maybe later, perhaps, when his wives officially dozed off he think of going out and checking out this party.
It had been a little while since they started walking and it was already raining, but Juliana lead her group right to the Bonobos. Tobi had not seen them yet and wondered where their leader is.
Tobi leads the group into making contact with the Bonobos. Although the area seemed a to have little activity because of the rain. Tobi smiles as he hopes to change that.
It didnât take too long for the bonobos to spot the strangers. Soon enough the whole village announced their arrival via a chorus of yeeping. Zarnha, the leader, came down to greet them. They were all greatly suspicious but not aggressive like the chimps.
âOh strange new guests!â She squeaked. âDoes Cornelius know of your arrival?â
âI see. Things are different around here, arenât they?â Tobi says.
He breathes deeply through his nose. The scent of the forest and of rain were on the breeze, light and subtle. He loves the rain.
âIf only i could show you the jungle during the rain. It is a beautiful sight. If course, even we are not in the jungle anymore. How I miss it⌠You know, I know that worry as well. That someone is lusting after my position, even If they have no regard for its responsibility. I donât know if they are well founded or not. I suppose it is still inside us. But for you I imagine it wonât happen. Your father seems to be an idol for these apes. Many of them would not want to betray his sacrifice or his memory, I think.â
âHe was and Iâll never be him. Though many wish or think I am. They treasure my bloodline and kept my fatherâs promise that I wouldnât forget who he was and what he did. Itâs been my burden since I was two. But things, even if I donât always notice it. Are improving. But I canât grow complacent. Thatâs when they go for your throat.â Cornelius ducked his head back inside as soon as he felt rain drops hit his pale muzzle. He sat back down with his wives as they groomed his tense body. Most apes were napping at this point.
âYes⌠I know that very well. I cannot allow myself to be distracted on day from my duties. Cookie and Juliana say I need a break. I trust in them of course, but I always need to be available to do what I need to do. I hope I leave a lagacy, but in truth i only care for the tribe,â Tobi says. He holds a hand out to the rain starting to dribble.
He notices some movement nearby. He steps outside and looks about to see his tribe members outside. Juliana grins slightly at him and moves in for a hug they both share.
âWe found coffee beans and sugar. We found some chocolate bars as well. We didnât find anything else preserved,â She signs.
âThat is fine, Juliana. You did well,â He gestures back.
He pokes his head back inside.
âCornelius, my compadres are back. They must have noticed the clouds moving in,â he says
âThatâs good. The storms here are long..â Cornelius eyed their human food. He wondered if it was even good,being itâs at least a dozen years since the humans made their last meals. âWell if you need to rest.â The rugs werenât moved, so they could lay down if they wanted to. To keep himself together during this unwelcome weather he took up grooming Wispâs thighs, he secretly thought she had the most plump.
âAt least the little demons are asleep now.â Cornelius murmured with a light smile. Now he could focus on the rain drops.
âWould you like to prepare for storm festivities?â Juliana asks Tobi.
Tobi looks at Cornelius.
âI suppose that is up to them,â Tobi says.
âDo you have drums?â Tobi asks Cornelius
Cornelius shrugged. Rain dance? That was something the bonobos liked to do. They seemed to love the water. Him? He didnât mind a peaceful bath but he didnât practically drown himself in it like a bon does..
âWe do. I have some here you could use. Most chimps here are pretty mopey about rain..but the bonobos love it. They party. Well they party about everything.â
The chimpsâ eyes light up. Drums, human chocolate, coffee and cocoa. This may not be on the scale they usually have, but they could make it work. Tobi isnât quite sure what a âBonoboâ is, though.
âHow will i know these⌠Bonobos? Where can I find them?â He asks.
âOh youâll know them. Theyâre our cousins. The females outrank their males. They yeep instead of hoot and the females have big beautiful pink rumps. And they fuck a lot..everyday, all day..â Cornelius scratched his chin, feeling a bit excited. He had a few hoot-yeep childrenâŚsurely. His wives huffed at him. âThere over there, closer to the waterâs edge. Hard to miss. They love it.. the matriarch is called Zarnha..â
Tobi becomes excited. Apes who like pleasures as much as he does? This is sure to be a good time.
âExcellent! Do they have their own drums or should we find the ones you have?â
âOh they have everything they need to party.â Cornelius smiled, eyeing his wives briefly. Maybe he could escort the guests to the bonobo side of town. NoâŚthey were too smart. He could never fool them. âTheir instruments are a bit different from ours. Less rough and crude I guess you could say. Some chimps like it and some donât..â
Tobi scratches his chin.
âYou say their instruments are more refined, huh? Maybe they are as good or better than ours. We shall go find them at once. Are you sure you do not want to come?â
Cornelius sighed, he wasnât a lover of rain. It dampened his mood. âMaybe laterâŚâ *if the sex Is good* he though to himself. His own family was settled down for a nap and expected him too as well. Theyâd only get anxious if he went off to party. Especially since they knew how he was with storms.
âVery well,â Tobi says, âWhich direction should we head? I do not know your homeland as well as you do.â
âTobi, I have been mapping out the land. I believe i know where to look,â Juliana interjects.
Tobi nods and looks at Cornelius.
âThen we are off. I hope you enjoy your nap. You have such a lovely family,â he says.
Tobi waves them off and had Juliana lead them toward the Bonobos, taking care not to seem aggressive as they all travel in one group.
Cornelius watched them wander off. What a strange bunch...party in the rain. A storm no less. Itâs just mood dampening! Perhaps if youâre raised with celebrating storms but it wasnât a tradition here. But he didnât feel tired so he just watched the scenery instead.
Maybe later, perhaps, when his wives officially dozed off he think of going out and checking out this party.