FORMAL COMMUNICATION 101: Phrases we are NO longer using, why, and what to use instead
1. I'm sorry/ I apologize
-> apology is admission of guilt. The law girlies have more on this. Admission of guilt is a submissive state that puts you under the dominance of someone else.
Instead, make it a praise moment for the other person
I'm so sorry I'm late that won't happen again
Thank you for your patience. Shall we begin?
Unless youre the spokesperson of a group its obvious what you say is your opinion. Pointing out out has an energy of 'don't attack me' which takes from your confidence and makes you seem weak since you're so used to being attacked to your opinion to a point you've resulted to pre-defense
Instead, use I think/ I'm of the opinion that
In my opinion equality is subjective
I'm of the opinion equality is subjective.
It never is. Even if it is, a person apologizing is admitting guilt, let them sit in it that puts you in the position of power. Never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever use those two words okay? Okay. It's the most awwwww naw pick me you get.
Instead use any firmer phrase, depending on your reaction (just because they apologized doesn't mean it's okay)
Nah it's okay it's all good
I didn't appreciate that, it's for the best that it doesn't happen again
I hear your apology / you. See you next time
(Uh we NEVER forgive someone just because they apologized. A place in your life must be earned, an apology isn't words its action)
They contradict each other, usually one uses them to validate a point while contradicting it and it's always a flop. "But" indicates contradiction/ resistance, no one likes that.
Yes, but it's also true that I'm right
I see where you're coming from, it makes sense from that angle. It however also makes sense from this angle, I think it's time we consider dualism / dichotomy.
Submission 101. Little miss I have no faith in my intellectual abilities and want to exempt myself from the embarrassment of being wrong/ little miss I can not withstand conflict so I play it down. Do. Not. It makes sense or it doesn't, say what you're saying and go.
The alternative is using 'I'm of the opinion that' / 'from where I'm standing'.
Well, women work twice as hard and face twice more challenges, if that makes sense
From where I'm standing / I'm of the opinion of / in my experience, women work twice as hard and face twice more challenges
Pro tip: your opinion / experience can not be challenged since one would have to be in your place to do so. It's the ultimate power point.
Nothing is more annoying than women that use this especially when making a case in a formal situation. No one will take you seriously when you sound like a teenager with self esteem issues. This downplaying of an opinion/ situation/ point to literally look smaller and less threatening isn't just submissive its pathetic. Unless youre talking to your friends stop that.
It's just that he said its okay so
No it's just I don't think we should
It just doesn't make any sense to me that-
There's no substitute for completely eliminating this word from your conversation. None. And speak with your voice steady and back upright, that little soft sound that accompanies this phrase is worse.
Especially after being asked to to a favor / task this eagerness to please doesn't sound very high value to me. Of course is possibly the highest level of willing submission
"Of course I will (enter task)"
I'll see if I can, I'll do my best.
'Yeah sure' is the closest evil cousin.
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