PolarSchizo

Man, it's crazy how a little over a year ago I really thought I looked my best and believed that this is what I deserved.

There's a lot to this backstory, too much that I'm hoping to move past through and appreciate this newfound life I am building for myself here in my native California.

Recovery, Sobriety... It's a struggle for sure. But reflecting on the image (left) and comparing it to the recent one (right); I'm very proud of myself and thankful of my progress.

Man, it's crazy how a little over a year ago I really thought I looked my best and believed that this is what I deserved.

There's a lot to this backstory, too much that I'm hoping to move past through and appreciate this newfound life I am building for myself here in my native California.

Recovery, Sobriety... It's a struggle for sure. But reflecting on the image (left) and comparing it to the recent one (right); I'm very proud of myself and thankful of my progress.

It's been a cool month, things are finally getting back to normal. Saving money - FINALLY - and gonna move out soon - God Willing - Just gotta keep pushing through and everything will workout.

Had an opportunity to pray for a client whose brother in law is in hospice care, may her family heal from whatever they may be going through this year and I pray that God works in them to bring them peace through these troubling uncertainties of all they're going through.

It's been a year now, I'm very happy I turned the page and decided to place my trust in something higher than me.

You got my attention, things are way more calmer and happier than they've been in years and for that I understand why things had to happen.

In some way, I did feel like Daniel in the lion's den. I was scared, stressed, anxious, and frustrated but in the end, you saved me and helped me truly focus on something better.

Today, I have a job that respects me. My circle is very small and that's okay. I love myself, and I love being able to give back to others when i can.

Someday....

I dunno what will happen, but what I really feel deep within is this peace that can't be taken away by the hands of man. Only God.

Yeah, Instagram suggested your old account trying to evoke an emotion from me. That's okay though, it didn't and I'm not going to ruin my day thinking about it; Wish you well! ✌️

The less we communicate, and the less we talk,

The more I'm starting to forget your face, your eyes and your soul; That's when we'd both moved on.

People were right, you could only pretend to be as strong and different only for 3 months. Your birthday is coming, I notice the orchards all around and the memories; I regret visiting Vegas and being reminded of just how much I miss you still. 💔

Las Vegas, March 2nd and 3rd 2022.

First actual vacation where I'm seriously grateful being able to have a stable job and no longer having to worry about risking my home or losing an income simply because I went for a mental health day.

Although the purpose was to renew my registration, being able to also drive around the city and revisit old memories with a different perspective can really change your life.

Vegas, I'm glad to have returned. A Year ago, I was really going through a lot and the memories of where we visited together really got to me deep. But that's over, life is different.

I'm happy for sobriety, all things are possible with the right mindset and a willingness to do what it takes to actually achieve that change.

I've lost more than my mind back then, I lost my respect and more importantly I gave power to things that will never happen again. I'm back to "Default" mode and upgraded with a better mindset for things to remain this way.