summary : out of all your old high school friends from mckinley high’s glee club, you were one of the very few to not form a career in the arts. choosing instead to become a doctor, you hadn’t ever explicitly shared your past in show choir with your coworkers. at least—not until one particular slow shift which led to a bet, karaoke, and a final push for one older night shift attending to ask you out.
pairing : jack abbot x fem!reader
cw : GLEE x THE PITT, a lot of angst from glee (finn’s death), grief, alcohol, reader says she isn’t ashamed of her past but isn’t as proud either, mentions of will schuester, more of a focus on reader’s history in glee club at some point, established attraction between abbot and reader but i can make a second part where they’re officially together if anyone wants it, not proofread, i think that’s all but let me know if i’m missing something!
masterlist! * . • ° • * . ° . * • one shot!
it was hard for secrets to stay secrets at the pitt. after endless hours in an enclosed space with pretty much the exact same people who are powered by caffeine, stress, and willpower, one had to learn to enjoy the little things. this included moments of rest, conversations unrelated to work, nights out at a bar after a tough shift, an early breakfast, and gossip.
gossip was always fresh and anything deemed scandalous, new, or interesting spread like wildfire. sometimes even leading to betting pools arranged by ahmad.
you had never been one to keep endless secrets, but you weren’t an open book either. if someone asked you a question you would answer truthfully and depending on how well you know them. for some interns, you told them you had a cat. for your friends such as dr mohan, you told her your cats name, age, and how you used to be scared of cats as a child.
it had been four years that you had been at ptmc’s emergency department as a resident and you were now thankful your residency was coming to a close. though, it had never occurred to you how little was actually known about your past.
over the years it became known that you liked iced coffee and enjoyed the occasional matcha, that you preferred pediatric patients over adult ones because of their whimsy, that you drove a corolla that was near and dear to your heart, and other little facts about your current life. yet, no one knew much about your life growing up other than the fact that you were from a town in ohio and kept contact with some high school friends.
it hadn’t been until one particularly slower day that your past came to light.
everything started when one patient from the previous night seemed to recognize dr shen from an online video of him from his early college years on the swim team. once the patient confirmed it was shen, the video was found by another person on the staff. needless to say, the news spread to day shift and the googling began.
you hadn’t put much thought into it all as you focused on helping patients and teaching the younger interns and med students through some cases. you did listen and look on with interest each time you stopped by the central hub and heard a new fact about a coworker of yours.
then, it so happened to be your turn.
you were stepping out of a patient room who you managed to get discharged after a broken wrist when you heard what sounded like an older video playback of a singing voice. you looked around but brushed it off as you went to go do some charting on your discharged patient, yet as you approached you saw a handful of people crowded around a phone.
the group included princess, perlah, santos, javadi, and whitaker who each had varying expressions of surprise and amusement.
your curiosity got the best of you and so you began to make your way over when the song and voice got clearer and you faltered.
the memory was so clear as if it had been yesterday when in reality it had been years ago. the first sectionals for glee club where you were all without mr schue and had your setlist stolen. while everyone scrambled and panicked to put together something quickly before the new directions had to perform, it was decided rachel would sing a solo.
but in an odd twist of fate, she had instead insisted you sing. you wouldn’t exactly consider yourselves rivals as much as mercedes or kurt were with rachel at times because while music was special to you—it was what gave rachel berry life. so you joined the club as a fun extracurricular and went through the motions.
everything worked alright that way, only when rachel’s ego popped up a couple days before did things change. santana decided to stir the pot and had voiced her opinion that you were the best singer in the new directions. obviously, this led to some arguing, but it shifted into an unspoken resentment from rachel to you when santana doubled down that you were simply better than the star.
it strained your otherwise respectful friendship and rachel found the best way to mend things was to give you the solo.
so you agreed and with sweaty palms and the wide eyes of a sixteen year old, you sang the one song you knew by heart—a song your father always played when you were a kid. bed of roses by bon jovi.
and it was that exact song and voice of yours that was playing from someone’s phone at the central hub. years after high school and glee club. before you had much of a chance to say anything, the last notes sounded and whitaker was the first to look away as he met your frozen deer expression.
“you can sing?” was the first thing he said which, of course, made everyone else look at you.
you sighed then, “yeah. back in high school.”
“were you some sort of theater kid?” santos grew a large grin as she leaned forward.
“no, i was a glee kid. we competed and all.” you shrugged. “that’s from our first sectionals and our setlist was stolen so we improvised.” you looked away and to a chart in your hands instead, opting to end the conversation before it delved deep into your past.
“hold on-“ javadi quickly rushed out, “you’re saying that was improv? you could be famous!” her mouth was wide with disbelief.
you smiled as the sight of your coworkers was slightly comical. “as much as i would love to continue this conversation, i have a patient to get to.” you then disappeared without waiting for a response from the huddled group.
while you hoped it would end there, it very much did not. the simple thought that one of their very own resident doctors sang so unexpectedly well paired with the unusual prolonged free time let the news spread like wildfire as google and youtube searches dominated phones.
videos from other competitions came up with excitement each time you were spotted dancing and singing in a matching dress with your old teammates. they even found articles on the new directions and the different wins and losses.
everything had started to spiral as it seemed so much was uncovered with it being confirmed you went to school, sang, and competed with broadway stars, famous singers, a film director, and more. it left them entirely stunned and in awe throughout the day.
“nice work.” robby complimented after one trauma case. “you know, i hope you stay as an er doctor after finishing your residency instead of going on broadway.” the comment slipped out of him so smoothly you almost missed it. key word: almost.
you groaned as you placed a hand on your face, only moving it away to glare at him as he looked very much amused. “not you too.”
“hey, it’s impressive. almost makes me wonder why you chose medicine.” and while you had an answer to the question, it wasn’t one you felt ready to share.
“why are we wondering that?” a separate voice said and you turned your head to see dr abbot approaching in a fresh pair of scrubs and his army printed backpack slung over his shoulders.
you were about to brush the subject off before robby quickly intercepted. “turns out she’s a songbird. there’s articles and videos of the pitt’s very own madonna.”
“okay first of all, i am nowhere near madonna’s level, she’s flawless. and second, why must you let the gossip spread?” you crossed your arms with a frown.
robby only laughed before being called by whitaker and so he walked away and left you with abbot.
“can i ask?” he broke the momentary silence that settled. you sighed and dropped your arms as you gave a shrug.
“back in high school i used to be in my school’s glee club. we joined competitions as a choir and there’s evidence on the internet of all of this. everyone’s just freaking out about finding out i can carry a tune and who my old friends are.” you explained and watched as a smile of a intrigue landed on his face.
“you’re acting like the world is ending.” he tilted his head at you.
but you huffed and hid your face in both hands. “it’s honestly so embarrassing that i keep seeing my face and hearing my voice from when the ages of sixteen to eighteen.” he laughed at that as he gently pried your hands away from your face. “i just don’t want to become known as the show-choir doctor. labels here stick, you know.”
at the admission, his amused expression melted away into something more honest. more genuine and understanding in the way he normally did when you shared any concerns with him.
jack was good at that. listening and understanding. whether it was when you complained about a patient or expressed worries for the uncertainty of the future, he always seemed to know what to say.
“i know that there’s probably a couple people here who won’t let it go, but most of them will. everyone here knows how great of a doctor you are so don’t let it get to you.”
his words settled in your mind and you found your shoulder slumping as you offered him a slow nod. “thanks.”
you dealt with a few more comments for the next hour before finally getting a chance to leave with hope that the topic of your glee club history would be old news by the morning. this was a sentiment that quinn agreed on when you called her on your drive home—unsure of who to talk to.
“i get it, i mean glee stayed a big part of who we were even after graduation.” she voiced with some minimal background noises of her cooking dinner.
“it’s not like i’m ashamed or anything, but when all you’re known as in high school is a glee kid getting slushied- it just was nice to be known as someone other than a singing kid.” you sighed as you unlocked your apartment front door, glancing at the video call to see quinn’s back turned as she grabbed some spices.
“i think we all managed to fight off those labels, i mean you’re an emergency medicine doctor, brittany is a mathematician, and didn’t marley become a journalist?”
“yeah. the pitt just runs on gossip sometimes. like there’s one student doctor who’s still called crash by this one resident after passing out on her first day.” you padded into your kitchen to see what leftovers you maybe had, propping your phone up against a candle on your island.
“well you never know, it could be forgotten by tomorrow.” quinn grabbed her own phone, looking into the camera to see you turn and pout.
“i hope so.” you groaned. “dr abbot said pretty much the same thing.”
a sly smile slowly grew onto quinn’s face that always made her look younger as it was an expression she always wore as a cheerio. “the hot older doctor you have a crush on?”
“don’t say it like that.” you couldn’t help the embarrassed laugh that slipped out of you.
“you never know, maybe he’ll google you too and come across the news articles from when we won nationals. you looked amazing in that picture.” you knew exactly which picture she was talking about.
you could never forget being on that stage in your matching red dress as your heart pounded in your ears. each of your hands anxiously gripped both sam’s and rachel’s before hearing that the new directions won.
confetti fell from above as you all cheered and celebrated. it had been a perfect way to end senior year before you’d be leaving glee club. while the club had grown over the years, you had first celebrated with the original members who joined when mr schue started the club. the first practice was so awkward and uncoordinated but eventually you had your team. with rachel, kurt, mercedes, tina, artie, and finn.
the picture in question showed you with the happiest look on your face as you shared a side hug with finn who hugged rachel on her other side.
in all honesty, you had always been close to certain members of the club while having more of a cordial relationship with others. quinn became one of your best friends when you had defended her after she left the cheerios for being pregnant, you gravitated more towards kurt and mercedes at times when the club was at odds, but finn—finn became like your other half.
while you happened to be one of the few who didn’t fight for his love and attention, you found a friendship with each other. you’re not sure exactly how it started, but you do know that when the football team started treating him differently and some of the glee members still viewed him cautiously, you welcomed him and offered advice where you could.
mckinley high had always been a place of stereotypes and you didn’t really fit in with a specific group. you were a smart kid but tried to make genuine friends where you could and while you were always unsure of what path to take in life, you had been pressured from a young age to be a doctor.
pressured that you would find success in the medical field but it hadn’t been your choice. when finn shared how he felt like he was placed into a box of being the quarterback, you related to being stuck. so when you each had the chance to do something for yourselves you took it. singing became your escapes.
glee club had always been a hot spot of relationship gossip that at times got very weird and unexpected, but against any rumors or speculation, you and finn remained the greatest of friends.
which is why his death hurt you so much.
the lasting conversation you remember from before his passing was about the future. you had each sat on the bleachers one very early morning at the end of summer break—having technically trespassed—when you told him you were considering music as your future.
it had shocked him, not because you weren’t a good singer, but because you had spent years working towards the hopeful future of becoming a doctor. in all honesty you were scared. music had opened a door that you knew wouldn’t close and it seemed easier than the grueling journey of college then medical school then residency. it scared you to wonder if you had what it took. without even voicing this, finn seemed to know.
“you should follow your dreams, but i know that you’d be the best doctor out there. plus just think of how cool you’d be as a singing doctor. i wish my doctor sang.” he had an arm around your shoulders in a hug as you laughed at his words.
“thanks finny.” you said quietly. “you’re still gonna be at the mechanic shop?” it had been a whirlwind of a time for him—choosing the army over college which didn’t work out and even calling off his engagement with rachel who was headed to new york.
he shrugged then. “i actually started thinking about applying to colleges again for the spring semester.” you shot away from his loose hug with a wide eyed stare at him.
“seriously? i thought you said college wasn’t for you?”
“well i got to thinking about what id wanna do, you know, for the future. i was just thinking about rachel being my future but she’s gonna ace it in new york and i can’t hold her back.” he explained as he fiddled with a thread on his jeans.
“finn-“ you started, hoping to assure him he was too good of a person to stop her from her dreams but he shook his head.
“i wanna do something good and i realize that someone who’s impacted me a lot has been mr schue. i mean without him i would’ve never done glee club and id be a different guy. i think im gonna become a teacher.” he finally met your gaze with apprehension, almost expecting you to laugh. you were the first one he decided to tell about his new dream but you were elated for him.
“finn that’s amazing. you’re going to be the best teacher.” you said as you brought him into a proper hug, hearing him laugh as he pulled away and bashfully shook his head.
when finn died you had been going through your general education classes at your university, and you found yourself overcome with grief which led to you almost failing a semester if it hadn’t been for the knowledge that he wouldn’t want you to fail anything.
the first summer after he died you were broken because you had so many plans and you were excited to see your best friend again after the long times apart. in the time alone as you grieved you grew closer with some of the others like quinn and rachel who each loved him.
it hadn’t been until one night that you were stargazing in your old backyard—an activity you would share with finn often—that you recalled that conversation and you decided to become a doctor for him and his memory.
only your glee friends knew about this as you never told anyone else because talking about finn hurt too much until it became just a piece of your past that you wanted to keep for yourself.
your call with quinn ended soon after her husband got home and after a quick hello, you were getting ready for bed as you played some old songs that held a lot of memories to them. you could never be ashamed of glee club, but you did hope that it would be forgotten or old news by morning.
it proved untrue as you walked in the next day to learn that night shift had managed to watch the same old videos and read the same old articles during moments of pause. you endured the light hearted teasing that lingered until a proposition was made by santos.
“you seriously want everyone to stop talking about you being a glee kid?” she had said as she popped up on your side as you moved around the floor.
“it’d be nice.” you glanced at her, curious at her genuine question.
“how about a deal,” you stopped near a wall as a gurney passed you both, “if we plan a night at this karaoke bar nearby and you sing and let me record it, then i’ll get everyone to stop.”
“why would you do that?” you had a small smile directed towards her as you two weren’t exactly close friends outside work.
“no reason.” she grinned but at your raised brows and pointed look, she sighed. “javadi bet me that you wouldn’t ever sing in public again.”
“why would she bet that?” your face scrunched in confusion.
“well,” she dragged out, “there may or may not be a betting pool that formed based on the likelihood of you singing in front of us all. i bet that you would sing outside of work under the influence of alcohol.”
you let out a deep sigh as you brought a hand up to your forehead, feeling a dull ache forming. “how many people are in on this bet?”
“almost everyone on day shift and a good amount of people from night shift.”
you blinked at her as she kept a smile plastered on her face that made you slightly unnerved, but you knew at some point someone would win the so called bet. and the temptation from santos getting everyone to drop the topic of your singing was strong.
“fine, but you have to split the winnings with me.” you watched her smile grow then drop.
you stood your ground and moments passed before she nodded. “fine, but the performance better be good. i’ll spread the word that it’ll be this friday after day shift.” she then sped away and left you standing there.
you only had to endure three more days of now knowing about the betting pool, and of likely being spoken to about the singing by any others who were also part of the betting that wanted to win.
and so the following shifts were odd in the questions about if you could still sing, what your favorite song was, if you could recreate a tune change from one of the videos found, and you were even asked to sing to a crying toddler with a broken arm. yeah, it had been a weird couple of days.
as you weren’t sure who to really talk to in pittsburgh about the nerves you had growing at the looming prospect of singing in front of others again—you spoke to a lot of your old glee friends.
the unholy trinity had told you to take a couple shots beforehand and do it for the money as well as to wow your coworkers while kurt and blaine had reminded you of your many fabulous solos. rachel had offered you some song choices that you had sang in the past which she recalled you sang best as they admittedly made her jealous, and mercedes texted you her encouragement while also referencing how confident in yourself and your singing you were in high school.
needless to say, their encouragement didn’t let you bail and so you drove home, showered and changed, then got into an uber as you knew you’d definitely be drinking.
walking in, you were first met with trinity who all but dragged you to where the others were sat and excitedly anticipated when you’d go on the small makeshift stage so she’d win the bet.
you waited a while as you needed some liquid courage and you chatted mindlessly with your favorite younger nurses mateo—who was off for the night shift—and emma. after two shots and a fruity cocktail you sipped slowly, you decided to get some water before going to sing as you didn’t want a repeat of the time glee performed in front of the school while drunk.
leaning against the bar you waited to catch the bartender’s attention when a presence came up beside you. looking curiously, your demeanor faltered when you met dr abbot’s eyes.
“dr abbot.” you stumbled. “what are you doing here?” you looked back at the table to see robby had also appeared and was now sitting with whitaker and jesse.
“i got the night off and robby invited me. i heard santos planned this whole get together.” his gaze on you never shifted as you found your beat up shoes to be very interesting.
“oh, nice.” was all you managed.
“getting a drink?” he leaned forward and off his leg.
“uh just water. i drank a little too quickly.” you let out a laugh to ease the awkward air you had been causing.
the bartender soon appeared in front of you and you asked for your water while abbot requested a beer. it wasn’t long until the drinks were placed in front of you each but neither of you moved, staying rooted to your spots.
“you plan on singing?” he asked suddenly. deciding to not lie, you nodded and he hummed. “for the betting pool? santos planning this all was a giveaway.” he had an imperceptible smile at the stunned expression you wore.
“i made her split the winnings with me.” you took a sip of you water, your mind momentarily going back to what song you’d sing instead of abbot in casual clothes standing right next to you.
“well i’m excited to see the performance. the old videos show promise.” he lifted his glass, missing the droop of your shoulders.
“you saw the videos too?”
“yeah. you won some nationals thing in 2012?” he attempted to seem as if he hadn’t done a deep dive of his own where he learned a lot about the show choir world.
he watched you nod simply. “we sang every week for assignments and all. there’s only a snippet of my glee time that’s actually on the internet.”
“then i’m glad we get to see the real thing tonight.” you nodded silently and looked back to the bottle of water in your hands as doubt crept into your mind slowly. he seemed to notice this as he placed a hand on your shoulder. “you’ll do great.”
it wasn’t long before you were tired of the constant glares from santos across the tables that you slipped away from the others and found yourself by the stage, looking through the queue to find a song. you wanted to do one that felt right as you didn’t think you’d perform in public again for a while, but high school you was pushing for perfection.
scrolling past the options, you paused when you saw one song and a small smile found its way onto your face. choosing that one, you were stepping onto the empty stage. as you waited for the music to begin you saw how not many people were actually looking at you and instead focused on their conversations, drinks, and such. even your coworkers were unaware of where you now stood until you began to sing.
it was a classic: the winner takes it all by abba and one you had once performed for the others for one of the weekly assignments.
as you moved through the start of the song, it had been abbot who looked at the stage first, followed by robby and the others shortly after as santos grinned while immediately going to record.
muscle memory seemed to take ahold of you at needing to move when singing and so you found yourself letting go and moving around the small stage as you let yourself sing. singing in front of a crowd opened something within you as you felt the same euphoric feeling you would feel after every assignment, competition, solo, and duo and you felt like you were floating.
as you held out the final notes and raised you arm beside you, your eyes closed momentarily and you could picture yourself back in that old classroom. opening your eyes you saw your present coworkers all cheering for you as other patrons in the bar did as well. you smiled and placed the microphone back down, leaving the stage and going towards the table with a lightness within you.
“that was amazing!” mel’s words reached you first and your smile stayed present as you took a seat again.
various other forms of praise were given to your singing, though santos seemed the most pleased as she bragged about her winnings. you were buzzed from the performance and the alcohol in your system when a canned coke was placed in front of you.
looking up confused, you saw abbot beside your corner spot of the table. he nodded towards the soda and leaned in an inch closer so you could hear him mutter “you were amazing” before he sat in an empty spot between robby and mateo, right across from you.
the night continued on as a couple other brave souls sang their hearts out to sad ballads, old classics, and more. you had made the choice to continue this relaxed peace and you got a couple more drinks—only stopping when you noticed how giggly you got.
“we’re heading out, but thank you thank you thank you y/n for helping me win.” santos slurred as she brought you into a bone crushing hug while you had been chatting with mohan.
“bye!” you exclaimed as you waved at her, whitaker, javadi, and mel who all began to leave.
one by one everyone had started to leave until it was just you, the two attendings present, mateo, and mckay.
“you doing alright there?” mckay leaned forward, tilting her head at you as you slumped against the table, clutching the long ago emptied piña colada glass in your hand.
“mhm. jus’ closing my eyes.” you mumbled.
“you should probably get home. do you need me to get an uber or taxi?” she looked at the other three who were highly amused at your drunken state—starkly different from the professional doctor they all knew.
before you could process her question, abbot cleared his throat. “i can take her. im heading out anyways.” he slipped out of his chair and gently led you to stand. a rational part of your mind knew you should object and insist on not troubling him to save yourself the embarrassment of being drunk and alone with him, but you couldn’t. not when his hold on your forearm was so warm and his other hand on your back made you grow a starry eyed look that you couldn’t conceal.
“drive safe.” robby waved a hand with a stifled laugh as he, mckay, and mateo each watched you leave.
“bye mateo, bye cassie, bye dr robby.” you waved to each of them as abbot led you to the exit.
the night was cool on your skin and you were still keenly aware of abbot’s hand on your back that stayed steady as he led you towards his truck. he helped you into the passenger seat before getting into his own drivers seat. his radio played some older songs that you mostly knew: either from your childhood or from mr schue’s music taste in a lot of the old competition songs.
you slurred out your address and enjoyed a peaceful silence as your eyes trained onto the passing nighttime scenery through the open window—the smell of summer heavy in your senses as it sobered you up.
abbot glanced at you every now and then to make sure you were still alive, and each time he did he would catch the slight movement of your lips as you sang along to the radio. he even heard you giggle to yourself when jessie’s girl by rick springfield played.
it didn’t take long for him to pull into the lot of your apartment complex and he shut the engine off, turning towards you to see you already looking at him.
“i missed singing.” you broke the momentary silence, looking into his eyes. “it’s been so long, i forgot what it felt like.” the words came out in a careful whisper as if you were admitting a shameful secret.
“why did you stop?” the question had lingered in his head ever since shen showed him the main video that had gone around the pitt of you. even at such a young age you had such promise and he’s certain you would’ve gone far as a singer. everyone had their own reasons for choosing medicine and choosing to be a doctor, and he was well aware of his own, though the curiosity nicked at him daily since then.
“my best friend died.” saying it so plainly felt heavy but at the same time it wasn’t crushing. you hadn’t shared finn’s death with anyone in your life since it happened all those years ago—at least until now. “he was gonna be a teacher, probably for music. it felt-“ you let out a shuddering breath, “it felt wrong to sing with him gone. like a piece of what made singing so great had left too.”
abbot held your gaze and saw the grief pooling beneath the cloudy drunkenness of your body and he reached a hand out to hold your own colder one. you didn’t say much more but he sat with you in your grief, understanding it completely.
that night he led you up to your apartment and helped you to bed with a glass of water by your nightstand as you fell asleep on top of your covers, your pink patterned socks on full display when you managed to kick your shoes off by the door. abbot had placed a throw blanket over you and whispered a quiet “goodnight, sweetheart” before slipping away, locking your door, and heading to his own home with a thoughtful look on his face.
in the entire time he’d known you, he realized he never fully knew you. not your past or what motivated you to get out of bed in the mornings or the deeply rooted joys of your life and it hit him then that he would be willing to do anything to learn it all, just because it was you.
so the following sunday when you saw each other during shift change, he found a quiet moment near the lockers where you sluggishly placed a zip up jacket on as you collected your things.
“you’re off this thursday right?” his voice startled you, your eyes darting up to see him standing before you with his hands in his scrub pockets.
“yeah-“ you coughed, recalling the faint blurred memories of friday night. “i am, yeah.” you had your bag now loosely off your shoulders as you shut your locker door gently.
“me too.” he stepped closer. “are you still a fan of greek food?” you were surprised he knew the fact about you, but he had remembered one of the conversations he had with you when you were a newer resident and therefore out on night shift. on one of those shifts you happened to harbor an intense craving for greek food which you shared with others in a sleepy state which left you talkative.
you nodded and he had moved close enough by then, reaching his hands out as he zipped up your jacket for you. “i know a nice place that has greek food. mind joining me for dinner on thursday?” he asked, his hands moving away from you as you stood frozen and stunned.
“sure.” you stuttered. “that sounds good.”
“good.” he smiled and you managed one back as his smiles were contagious. just as you both started to walk away from the lockers, you stopped right before you’d part ways, looking up at him.
“just to be clear, is this a- well an um,” you struggled to say the word ‘date’ in fear of being humiliatingly wrong.
“a date. yes, it’s a date.” the flush on his cheeks was so faint you almost missed it, but it was more prominent to you after you gave him a happy grin that washed away your exhaustion of the day.
“cool, great. well i gotta get going. have a good night dr abbot.” you gave him a brief wave before turning away with the smile still ever so present on your face. abbot wore his own similar look as he started his shift, ignoring the curious glances from others at his unusually upbeat mood.
