Poeticartifacts

My friend wrote his suicide notes, in my room, right next to me, with my pen and pad. He hung himself across the street from my house. 19 years I have carried his weight with me.

Selfishness is rarely a conscious decision. Real selfishness. The kind that leaves you separated from the people who need you in a moment because you forget to look outside of yourself, and take a good breath.

The fallout from that selfishness (especially if it happens more than once) can shatter trust. Once you do that…..  you can’t just ‘earn’ it back. You don’t save up ‘I did good’ chips in a pile, and just use them to cash in on a mistake as a way of keeping trust. That’s not how it works. Trust is a gift someone can give you. It’s a delicate and vulnerable gift, it breaks easy. If you never have a moment of selfishness again in your entire existence, they still may not think of you as trustworthy. They don’t have to.

All you can do, is hope they allow you time to show that you are working, and trying your damn hardest to be grateful and present in each moment…. and succeeding.

My new book!!!!!

The Ghost at the Wheel is a series of poems and stories focused on the people, events, and moments that have had a long lasting impact on T.J.'s life. How these moments are interpreted and remembered shape the course that led to this moment here. Many times, one can find that the worst situations, the hardest struggles can afterward give a source of beauty to honor in the present. We are all haunted by our past. But each of us is able to decide which of these specters is allowed to drive our daily actions.

Agreements

Tindal Muzic featuring TJ Natole

Don’t love anyone you can’t break. Treat relationships like a captain would his ship Navigate rocky reefs Risk running aground Exhilarated, but aware Of how delicate Each moment is

(via https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YOBfp4Z8sLM)