Fire-breathing poet

All this yearning is burning me alive

And I can't let it show.

Can't let anyone know why

It feels like I lie

When I talk about liking a guy.

Or why I'm afraid of looking pretty

In a feminine way

Just in case someone like me

Thinks that I don't look gay.

And I'd like to have someone

But I fear if my first is a man

Then that's all I'll ever be allowed.

If I can, I'd like to be more free than that.

Free to choose and chase a siren,

Or an angel, or a queen,

Windswept hair and bare feet

On wild grass, fields evergreen.

I want to be seen, for once,

Though I can't meet my own eyes in the mirror.

Maybe I finally will

Once I'm seen by the goddess within her.

I want to be her, want to be with her.

I envy her sometimes, but above all, I yearn.

Like the heretic that I am

When you stake your claim

Your teeth mark my skin

But no visible love bite

Will cause me shame

All that I am is yours

To protect and to destroy,

To hurt and to heal

Let me put my life

In your most sinful hands

Rose-petal-red are his lips where I bit them

Crimson and scarlet, the skin that I marked

Green as a glade is the magic in his eyes

Shining in the glow of the fire we sparked

Black as a raven, his hair where I grip him

Pink is the blush colouring cheeks and chest

Blue are his eyes when the tide overtakes him

Blue like a tidal wave starting to crest

White are the sheets, like his knuckles when he grips them

White is my vision when he calls my name

White is my mind going blank when I'm with him

A beautiful beast only I'm allowed to tame

Orange is the warmth of his touch when he holds me

Orange like a sunset, or a fireplace

Warmer and softer is his gaze lingering on me

Soft as the smile on his at last peaceful face

Love and lust and laboured breathing,

I dine at a banquet fit for gods.

His form is regal, sculpted marble,

His voice is yelling, "Oh dear god."

But I am no deserving god,

And my dear darling worships none.

There's only one god in the multiverse,

And I'm watching him come undone.

I deify with mortal hands,

A pilgrimage from lips to hips,

A prayer uttered on my tongue-

He writhes beneath my fingertips.

No, I am no deserving god,

But here is one that worships me,

Offering himself up at the altar-

I dine upon his flesh and he calls it mercy.

He's lean and tall, I'm mean and small

I am a mortal, he's divine

He's marble skin, a devilish grin

And I will never call him mine

Kind eyes crinkle, how they twinkle

Icy blue, his warm gaze lingers

Sharp jawline, he'll never be mine

Elegant with long white fingers

Narrow hips and wine-stained lips

His hair, it crests like tidal waves

His shoulders broad, he is god

A gentleman who misbehaves

My mind ponders, my eyes wander

How would it feel with him to lie?

Hold back a whine, he is not mine

I drown in daydreams with a sigh

If it's only a want

Why does it feel like a need?

If it's as natural as hunger

Why does it feel like greed?

If it does no harm to you

Why does it feel like I crime

When I stare at your bare skin

Every day and all the time?

Oh, but it does harm to me

Eats at me from the inside

To not have you inside me

-I've begged and prayed and cried

Oh, a crime it is indeed

Whether a need, a want, or greed

And though you're guilty of no crime

I'm your victim for all time

I'm infinitely more attracted to you

On days like this

When the stress makes me think about

All the parts of you I want to kiss

Of all the times I could have touched your face

And kissed your forehead light

On all of those rough days I could have

Wrapped my arms around you tight

Of every moment gone to waste

Because of this uncertainty

Whether or not, on days like this

You too, drown in thoughts of you and me

How I wish you didn't exist

I clench my jaw and shake my fist

I am a fool, I am a mess

I was a queen, a lioness

How dare you look me in the eye

Then smirk at my admiration

I pretend my love is a lie

I stare at you with condemnation

All while I dream of pinning you down

Of stroking you to hear you moan

Of biting those lips that smirked

I dream that we're alone

But that fire hides away

From your penetrating gaze

So in your eyes I'll always be

A dreaming girl caught in a daze

I want to taste rainwater on your lips

In the forest mist, I want to be kissed

Your warm body in the cold mountain air

Frostbitten fingers, they trace and linger

Your breath on my neck, forbidden whisper

Your hands on my hips, your name on my lips

Slipping beneath layers to feel your skin

Let me feel you within, let me breathe you in

If he were an ocean

I would drown in his blue waters

If he were fire

Then I would set myself alight

If he were the wind

Then I would run a mile an hour

But he is a dream

And so I curse the morning light