Scalawag

Sam and John deal with Azazel. They’re both messed up beyond any fixing because Dean is what kept them sane, kept them going.

Hell finds some other Righteous Man to turn into torturer, and then imagine. Imagine. Dean spends a year in a heaven tailored specifically to show him the best, fondest memories of his dad and kid brother. And once it’s time, angels use that to manipulate Dean into accepting Michael in exchange for them resurrecting Sam in All Hell Breaks Loose.

One moment Bobby and John mourn the death of their second child, the last son, and the next Sammy is miraculously alive, and the plot rolls on and on and John doesn’t trust Ruby even half an inch and Ruby does her best impression of Dean and Sam misses Dean so much he falls for her even faster.

And then and then and then <3

Dean shows up. Sam and John and Bobby know it can’t be him, they burned him, this must be a shifter, a witch, anything that changes its appearance. But no <</33 It’s just Michael, the First Archangel of the Lord, wearing a very resurrected Dean Winchester, John’s firsborn son, Sam’s beloved brother, like a meatsuit.

Man. SamJohnBobby would go ballistic. And they can’t even DO anything. Remember Dean and Bobby trying to fight off Cas when he first showed up, except no matter how out of place Michael’s mannerisms look on Dean’s face, no matter how much his eyes glow, no matter the huge shadows of a double set of actual wings behind Michael’s back — it’s Dean’s body. Dean is alive. He’s in there somewhere. Michael won’t try to defend himself against Dean’s family (as if they could harm him at that point), but Dean’s family won’t even try anything because it’s Dean in there. Alive.

You know Michael isn’t cruel. He won’t taunt them in any way. But the other angels? Zachariah? Even Gabriel?

They won’t shut the fuck up about how Dean belongs to Michael. That Dean is like a bloodhorse. A racing Thoroughbred bioengineered by angels so specifically they knew he’d be Michael’s ride long before there was an egg in Mary’s mother’s ovary. John and Mary? Bred together with Heaven’s love spell, delivered kindly by a Cupid. Mary being so set on calling Dean an angel? Having all those angel figurines watching Dean’s crib? That was Michael’s influence. Michael was watching Dean from Day 1. Watching Dean sleep, eat, play. Learn to fall, learn to walk. Waiting, up in heaven, for the day they can reunite.

God, angels would be so fucking nasty about the whole thing. How Sam is diseased and spoiled and can’t be trusted for being Lucifer’s vessel, and how Dean was made by God to be nothing but the vessel. Granted, the Perfect Vessel; it’s a great honor, he’s a great fit, a soldier vessel for the patron of all soldiers, for the first soldier of heaven.

But still just a meatsuit who was voyeured on & whose fate was decided before he was even conceived.

Imagine how much it would fuck up John, Sam, and Bobby, to hear all that romanticized dehumanizing shit angels spew about Dean.

Imagine how angry Michael would get when he learns of his siblings implying the perfect vessel is anything but the most perfect instrument in existence, something to love and admire, something that finally makes Michael complete and allows him to live out his Father’s plan.

michael is not functioning well. him and lucifer have been fighting and harming each other for centuries. he's bleeding grace all over, he isn't making much sense, and he grasps onto his Promised Perfect Vessel like it's his only lifeline in existence (and it is)

he is Mad about how things went before the cage. blames other angels for messing up their job so badly, for destroying dean's trust in heaven and angels so thoroughly, that it led to Dean, the Perfect Vessel designed for Michael by Father Himself, rejecting him. that's unacceptable, that's the angels' fault, and michael has no trust in their plans anymore.

so michael comes to dean in a dream. it was an okay dream, but the broken archangel's presence there unintentionally turns it into a horrible nightmare. twisted, unseen-before realms, glimpses of the cage and terrible beasts that came before angels were created.

once he somewhat settles in, michael shows dean flashes of what's going to happen if he isn't let in & doesn't get involved into the winchesters family business. that dean is the first to die, and john dies trying to save him and goes to hell, and then sammy dies, and dean ends up being tortured in hell anyway & leads to the starting of the apocalypse. michael promises to help avenge mary by dealing with the yellow-eyed demon & save dean's dad and brother, and save dean too. michael is broken from the cage, jaded, and no longer interested in living through his father's plan for the world.

after going through the impromptu hell/lucifer's cage experience in his dreams (courtesy of the archangels's broken mental state), dean, tormented and panicked and devoted to his family to the last atom of his being, says yes

despite how completing & complimenting michael's possession of dean is, as soon as michael becomes physical on earth, he starts freaking out. it'd probably look like dean got a traumatic brain injury out of nowhere — scrambling for purchase, overbalancing, veering to the side in a non-stop seizure-like episode that would scare the shit out of sam and john.

he'd flash his wings in his panic & accidentally cause dean to harm himself by thrashing around & lead to john and sam trying (and failing) to to immobilize dean. once the archangel snaps out of it and immediately retreats in the back of dean's mind to lie low and attempt to calm himself, dean's on the forefront of his mind for the first time since going to sleep last night, and it's like a living nightmare. dad, i fucked up. i don't know how--i let him possess me--michael, he said his name is michael--no i don't... i don't know--he said you both die--he promised he'll help--the shit i saw, it's, i can't, dad, i can't, i'm sorry--nonono, sammy, it's okay, i'm okay, i puh-promise--i think he's calming down--

bonus points azazel is shitting his demon pants when he tries to take dean out & sees archangel double wings flash. he should've known, if lucifer is real, so is heaven & angels, and here his ignorance leads to his failure & The Plan falling through.

It’s hard to pinpoint what the fuck is wrong with those boys. That doesn't mean people can't see it.

The big one is always dressed ten years too old, in clothes that are somehow too small. The little one can’t seem to wear a shirt that doesn’t reach past his hands. Their clothes never hang right off of them. Like they weren’t selected from a store, but grabbed quickly from someone else’s drawer. 

Where their clothes aren’t ripped, there’s shitty stitching in their place. The younger ones’ seams are much nicer than the olders'. Like more time and care was put into his wardrobe. Their mother must have had a favorite. Not that anyone’s ever met her. Or the boys’ father. The older brother came to the younger ones' parent-teacher meetings. 

Eventually people in the podunk town they are staying in learn their names. The older and bigger one is Dean. The younger and smaller one is Sam. Their normal names didn’t match whatever weird ass nonsense those two had going on. 

how bela would feel telling him about the endless nightmare of her father abusing her, the ensuing hatred and rage and revulsion, how her vengeance damned her. she expects the same from dean, to be validated, for her trauma to be mirrored and shared.

dean: w-

cas: yes. that's our child.

john:

cas: jack is a nephiliim. the product of a human and an angels carnal union.

john