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You’re not hungry for an entire pizza and a quart of ice cream, the baby is.

You’re not craving fast food from two different places, the baby is.

You’re not forcing me to go to the gas station at 11 pm for more candy, the baby is.

It’s not your fault that you’ve gained so much weight. That you can’t walk up stairs without getting out of breath. That you have to waddle. That you doubled our grocery bill. That you can’t seem to stop being an insatiably hungry, fat fucking cow. It’s the baby’s fault.

This question will be one that you get used to. For two reasons.

For one, you’re just going to be pregnant a lot. Being a fat breeding cow, I’ll obviously be breeding you as often as I can. So, you’ll have an answer. People will never accept your answer, however. You say you’re only 4 months pregnant, they say you must be further along. When you insist, they insist you must be having twins or even triplets then, and that they must’ve just missed it on the ultrasounds. When you’re 8 months pregnant, they’ll tell you that you look like you’re about to pop, and ask how many you’re having. Whatever your answer is, they’ll always think it’s more. Even if you were having twins, people would insist you must be having triplets or quadruplets, that there’s still no way you’d be THIS big. But you will be. Cause you’re a swollen, fat, fucking breeding cow. And I’m going to make sure you satisfy every pregnancy craving, as soon as you have it. I’ll insist on you having seconds or thirds at meal times, make sure you really eat for two. And if I think you’re not doing a good enough job, I’ll tie you up, and *make* you eat more. You’ll only get free once I’m satisfied that you’ve really gotten enough calories down.

Secondly, you’re always going to look like you’re pregnant. You’ll have a big, round belly. Milk-filled, fat tits. Wide, thick hips. A big, fat ass. Chunky, child-bearing thighs. So, people will think you’re pregnant. You’ll just have to tell them that you’re not, at least, not at the moment. As they look down to your belly, and back to your face, embarrassed, you’ll get used to giving that big gut a pat, explaining that you just can’t seem to lose the weight between pregnancies. As if you could even lose that much weight in 4-6 months. You fat, fucking cow.

You're always eating something or rubbing on your engorged milky tits. You don't think I wouldn't notice all these rapid changes? No one's body gains so much fat in such a short time naturally, or produces litres of milk a day like you do. I've caught you suckling on your own teats before for god sake!

BLUBBER GUT video out now!

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