Fat Girl. Skinny Girl. -103 lbs

i can see that i’ve dropped weight

i don’t feel better

i don’t feel prettier

i don’t feel like i’m winning

i don’t feel like i’m achieving

i don’t feel the control

i only feel like i’m wasting

losing

getting worse

getting uglier

getting deeper into this hell

getting out of control

getting lost

and the worst part is that i still can’t get myself to eat because if i see myself gaining weight i will go into hysterics and feel the same emotions and the same emptiness and the same worthlessness

and i have no idea which direction to go in

and i need help but i can’t ask for it because i don’t have the time for it

and i feel lonely

so

fucking

Many active people (women included) eat 3000+ calories a day and stay plenty lean.

The recommended daily calorie intake is 2000 for women and 2500 for men.

The recommended daily calorie intake for weight loss is 1500 for women and 2000 for men.

A 5-year-old needs about 1400 calories or more every day.

The minimum daily calorie intake for a long-term diet without medical supervision is 1200 for women and 1800 for men. Eating less than that eventually leads to starvation mode (a real–yes, real–state of biological stress characterized by decreased metabolism, increased cortisol production, and heart, brain, organ, bone, and muscle damage).

A 2-year-old needs about 1000 calories or more every day.

Most people can’t even imagine eating 1000 calories in a day. You’ll get 1,357 Google results if you search for the exact phrase “1000 calories is way too low” or “1000 calories is way too little”…but you’ll get even more results if you Google the same phrases for 1200 calories, because few people consider dipping below 1200.

A 3-digit daily calorie intake puts you at high risk for binge-eating, slowed metabolism, bone and muscle loss, nutritional deficiencies, gastrointestinal issues, infertility, hair loss, mood swings, and depression. Oh–and sudden death.

900 calories is less than what a completely sedentary, 5'0", 80 lb, 70-year-old woman burns daily (keeping in mind that your metabolism slows with age).

A very low calorie diet, also known as a starvation diet, is 800 calories a day or less. It is prescribed by doctors to obesity patients who need to lose weight quickly, is specially formulated to be nutritionally complete, and is monitored by medical professionals to prevent sudden cardiac arrest and death. It is considered an extreme diet.

600 calories a day or less is literal starvation.

500 calories is less than the daily calorie needs of the average 1-month-old.

400 calories is less than the daily calorie needs of the average newborn.

300 calories is less than what the adult brain alone burns every day.

Weather it was a fatphobic comment overheard during class, or bullying, or a “health” obsessed parent, or a society saturated in diet culture, or trauma, or anything else; I’m sorry.

You were wronged. You may never hear it from the people or things that influenced it, so hear it from me.

You deserve better.