— *61

reblog / like / follow !

reblog / like / follow !

❝can you believe my sister commented on my last instagram picture that i look like satan?❞ 

❝listen… i may be tiny but my kicks can reach very high don’t try me. ❞

❝ actually, you’ve got it all wrong, darling. my middle finger salutes you. ❞

❝ i look like shit, this is exactly why no one wants to date me. ❞

❝ did you know in that in eighth grade i kicked someone’s knee and broke it? ❞

❝ he deserved it, no one fucking compares me to a semi-trailer and gets away with that. ❞

❝ do i look like my brother’s keeper to you? ❞

❝ the best thing that happens when couples combine their names on facebook is that you can block them both in one press. ❞

❝ you know, it’s so weird that the saying is butterflies in your stomach, it should me just flies because usually the person you fall for is a piece of shit. ❞

❝ you know you should all just break up with your boyfriends and just date me, we could be each other’s sisters wives. ❞

❝ yes it is morning, good however it is not. ❞

❝ why do birthdays happens only once a year? i want to get birthday gifts every week.

❝ i’m literally the biggest sinner in this city. ❞

❝ how does my grandma always sees me from her window, for fucks sake, there’s a building in front of hers! ❞

❝ i just hope my grandma won’t tell my mom she saw us kiss.. ❞

❝ if you piss me off one more time i will throw my phone at your face. ❞

❝ scaring people is kinda my thing. ❞

❝ what do you mean thanks? bow down to your fucking queen. ❞

❝ what do you mean thanks? lose your clothes. ❞

❝ why yes, throwing water balloons at our boss is a good idea. ❞

❝ well you see there’s thing thing called google, how about you use that instead of driving me nuts. ❞

❝ oh for the love of god, all i wanted was a bit of silence and rihanna’s voice is that so fucking bad? ❞

❝ we should watch porn together, that will be fun. ❞

❝ who’s idea was it to do this again? ❞

❝ i swear i’m a nice person once you get to know me. ❞

❝ i am not a midget! i’m 5′0 for godness sake! ❞

❝ when will the aliens save me from this awful planet? ❞

❝ do you think anyone will notice if i burnt down the school? ❞

❝ honestly, who cares, i mean if i break my leg then i will get babied by you so just push me off the bar i beg of you. ❞

❝ i wish i was an ice cream cone. ❞

❝ you can’t handle being punk rock, you can barely handle being cheesy pop. ❞

❝ if you punch me in the face i’ll give you a dollar. ❞

❝ honestly i’ll give everything for the hulk to fight me. ❞

❝ i feel as if someone is baking me in an oven. ❞