made a post for u but i eated it

FIJMU News 8-12-26 by Jess Gitgud

Alex Garland has finally announced the cast of his upcoming Elden Ring film! The director of Annihilation, Civil War, Warfare, and also some decent movies, Garland scored the director job of a lifetime with this upcoming game adaptation which boasts a budget of over 120 million dollars, five of which won't just go into the producer's pockets.

Here are the final confirmed roles for the actors announced:

Melina - Cailee Spaeny, perfectly cast, rumor has it she already got the claw symbol tattooed permanently!

General Radahn - Nick Offerman, perfect for this tough role, Offerman has already learned to ride a horse, removed his feet, and eaten the flesh of veterans to become the character!

Godrick the Grafted - Jonathan Pryce, known mostly for regal British roles, now he can go wild with this wicked role! His natural extra limbs will also prove a benefit!

Hoarah Loux, Warrior - Dolph Lundgren, he won't need to act much to become this beefy beast of a man, "Probably a good thing," according to his many time co-star Sylvester Stallone.

Alexander, Warrior Jar - Danny DeVito, iconic in too many roles to mention, DeVito has already recorded his lines, and spent over 70 hours inside a jar of guts on set despite not being asked to for the entirely CGI role. Where he got the jar of guts is under investigation.

Gurranq, Beast Clergyman - Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, the famous wrestler gained 7,000 pounds to play this beast and its spoilery alternate form! Whether he will grow head and body hair is unknown.

Astel, Naturalborn of the Void - Scarlett Johannson, she's not actually a malformed stellar entity, but she's also not Japanese or Trans so this role poaching is nothing new to her.

Godskin Duo - Bud Abbott and Lou Costello, both dead, this unconventional casting is made to ensure extreme accuracy to the roles, which are also both deceased zombies. True-to-theme casting!

The Loathsome Dung Eater - Jared Leto, more true-to-theme casting!

>thread is from 13 years ago

a million times this. “I don’t like these xyz fics” then don’t read them. THEY ARE NOT FOR YOU!!!!!!! no one forces you to read anything you don’t want to read. no one forces you to consume art you don’t enjoy. it’s so easy to click that mute or block button. instead of insulting fanfics or fan art for not fitting your personal liking, either choose something that does fit your personal liking, or write the fic you want to read yourself / draw the art you want to consume yourself.

netflix is making a hockey show called "the sticks" that is based on a very real tragedy that occured in canada in 2018.

the show follows a minnesota high school team after their bus crashes and coming back to hockey afterwards.

in 2018, the humboldt broncos' (a junior A team made up of 18-22 year olds) bus was hit by a tractor trailer on a highway intersection. 16 people (10 players, 2 coaches, and 4 team staff members) were killed, along with 13 other players severely injured.

the memory of the humboldt broncos crash is an incredibly sensitive subject carrying a lot of trauma to both the survivors, their families, and deceased's families. the trajectory of hockey in canada was changed significantly after this tragedy.

despite this, netflix has decided to make a show using the death of young hockey players for profit. they did not consult the survivors, nor the deceased's families. they stole a canadian story for a feel-good cash grab.

if your love for a shittily written FICTIONAL world is greater than that of real living, breathing, suffering minorities you dont deserve to say you care about us, you dont