ER Nurse By Night...

When your stroke alert patient rolls into the ER with a “last seen normal” time 2 hours and 45 minutes ago and you’re waiting for a decision on TPA

My patient’s blood cultures come back positive...

it is i, Zyrtec the allmighty,

you are no match for Xanax the Wise

viagra 

And don’t forget Lord Catapres, whose talents include facilitating coping with ADHD, PTSD, Tourette’s syndrome and facial tics, along with lowering blood pressure (not very well, though. But he’s cute.)

When your pad’s on crooked but you don’t realize it until after you leave a public bathroom

OH MY GOD SO NO FUCKIN BULLSHIT I SWEAR To GOD. I reblogged this an hour ago and IM NOT Lying My Tax Refund which I did in late march popped into my Bank Account, and it was a Decent sized amount……

yooooo

Anytime a coworker says it’s quiet...

Me, when someone tells me they didn’t realize all nurses are responsible for...

Me, when report starts out with the words “I’m sorry.”

When the B52 kicks in..

When your pt tries to beat up the staff and asks what you’re going to do about it. Then they get 4-points and a shot in the ass.

Dumb things my patients and their families have said #201: