i don't know

every time i see someone who was not homeschooled try to talk about homeschooling i shoot them with lasers from my eyes.

for personal reasons i will be crawling out of my own skin

ok sorry one more whiny post. i thought i worked through the gender feelings i really did and i Will suppress the hell out of them if this is starting again but that familiar pain of seeing a man that gives me crazy crazy gender envy . felt that bullshit yesterday after a long fucking time GET IT OUT OF HEEREEEEE I CANT DO THIS SHITTTTTTTT GO AWAYYYYYYYYYYYYAYYAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

i like cannot emphasize enough how much i dont. want. a job. like i genuinely cannot do it. i cannot work a 9 to 5 for a long period of time it makes me so miserable it makes life completely and totally not worth living. i am scared shitless to graduate, dog. even if i miraculously find a job in my industry im going to hate every second of my life because it all revolves around working the fucking job.

one i start lexapro i will be unstoppable