Miss Americana - My two cents
I have a lot to say about Taylor Swift’s Documentary film. I mean I cannot post everything in my stories so I took down notes and decided to put my thoughts into writing and save it in my blog.
First of all, I’m not a fan of Taylor but I love a lot of her songs. Most recently, Archer and Lover are on my favorite playlist. She has a way of relating to people through her songs. I heard a few issues about her such as her rift with Katy Perry, Kanye and that asshole who groped her but I never had an opinion about it because I don’t think it is fair to judge when we only know what the media tells us. I really don’t know her but her music is enough.
I saw a few friends on IG commenting about Miss Americana and while I don’t like documentaries, I decided I should watch and check it out. Well, what can I say? It was worth it. I have some favorite lines which I already shared on my IG story but I took down notes to summarize what I learned from her. Thought I’d share it to you so you can reflect and perhaps pick up some points too.
Taylor said “I’ve been trained to be happy when you get a lot of praise.” When she said this part, I know that it was in her past. The young Taylor who needs constant validation and approval from people she doesn’t even know. I feel so sad for her because at a very young age, her happiness depends on other people and their approval. I wonder how she feels when no one is clapping or smiling after her performance? Or after a good performance and she goes home without anyone applauding her? Don’t get me wrong, validation sometimes make us feel better but using validation as a source of happiness will do us more harm than good. When it was my first time as a manager, I always wanted to hear my boss telling me I did a good job. I need to hear it from her, otherwise I won’t feel complete or satisfied at work. As a result, I developed self-doubt and wasn’t at my best when I don’t hear it. I guess what I am trying to say is - praises or validation from other people isn’t sustainable. When they don’t acknowledge your hard work, or when they don’t smile at your performance then what will happiness mean for you?
Taylor said “We are intricately insecure because we liked the sound of people clapping”. Much respect for Taylor to admit her insecurity because whether we admit it or not, our constant need for validation is a sign of insecurity. We want the admiration of people, we want them to applaud and regard us for the things we’ve done. We want the credit for things we’ve done no matter how that impacts other people. Yes, that is insecurity. The constant need to be recognized, to make a mark or feel important - And Taylor was tired of it all. (My only assumption is because she finally accepted her insecurity and realized it’s time to put an end to it) I know a few people who are like this, you will see them in social media all the time. There are some people who want to be applauded for their accomplishments, there are some who wants to rub their intelligence to other people by posting their opinion on social media, those who can’t seem to leave their phone when doing charity work and those who pretend to be all Godly and compassionate and kind on social media. Cmon let’s face it, we did this once or twice but the excessive need for attention and recognition is just meh! Stop with the insecurity and that hypocrisy in social media!
Taylor said when all the fame is gone, when she gets her goal , what does she have? She has her mom. She doesn’t have a boyfriend at the time but she has her mom. She has someone on her side. Is it perfect? I don’t think so. Do they fight? I’m sure they do but just like any other family, their love and respect for one another is bigger than their pride and misunderstanding. Taylor said she used to worry about other people’s opinion of her, but when she found out about her Mom’s cancer, everything else seemed irrelevant. That’s because at the end of the day, our family and true friends are the ones on our side. And no, we don’t get to choose what type of parents are given to us or the type of family we have but we have a choice on how we respect, love and keep our relationship. I simply don’t believe that there are bad people or relatives or parents, they are people with circumstances. That’s what love is all about, not counting the wrongs and just loving people despite of their imperfections and faults. So Taylor, you have my respect for showing much love for your mother who I’m sure is not perfect but simply because you respect and love her dearly and don’t say bad things about her.
Taylor said she is finally happy, really happy. All of us wants to be happy, who doesn’t right? If you find yourself always miserable and sad and lonely and you keep doing the same things, what do you expect? I mean your circumstances won’t change until you do something differently, but before you do something differently your belief and principle should also take a shift. This is true for Taylor where she was happy before when someone applauds her, when she realized that this shouldn’t be the case she found her purpose and her voice. She knew what’s important and that is her well being, her family and true friends and not the validation of strangers.
Overall, I give this documentary a 10. A lot of people should watch this, especially those who are in dire need of recognition all the time. This is for you, so you may be able to see that Love really comes from within, that our llves change when we make a conscious effort to recognize that we are imperfect and insecure.I think we need to realize that more than the accolades or likes of strangers in social media, our family and true friends are the gem of our lives. I think it’s time to realize that social media may get you the likes you want but at the end of the day, it’s those moments outside IG and FB that matters. We need to stop proving ourselves to people and be confident on what we bring to the table and this world, with or without cameras around. This is the real world, real people with real lives and for sure we will see the beauty of it when we finally stop putting ourselves in the spotlight but letting others take the reign and the stage we are standing on.
