I’m sorry to ruin your day like this. It just hurts my heart to see how toxic the dance world can be!

toxic body image is quite prominent in the ballet world, but i would say that it’s more of a prevalent issue in the professional world. there is so much diversity in the adult ballet classes i have attended, and not once have i heard of any body shaming ! there is a wide range in ages in my current class; there are moms and grandmothers- to expect them all to have the same body would be insane ! but i also don’t live in a super conservative place either, so the community around me may be different from where you and your friend live.

was your friend a professional dancer ? was it in an adult ballet class and from another fellow adult dancer or the instructor? it’s very unfortunate that your friend had a terrible experience and i’m sad that her peers or mentor took away ballet from your friend. ballet is for everyone, and no one should listen if they are told otherwise.

my first class was a huge sigh of relief, to be honest ! i took my first adult ballet class at my uni and was worried i’d be surrounded by people who’ve been dancing since their childhood.

while there were those who were experienced dancers, there were others who experienced ballet very briefly in their life and others who never stepped foot into a studio (like me). there was so much diversity (age, gender, race, size, experience, etc.) in such a small class (10-15 people), so definitely don’t be intimidated if you’re debating whether to attend a studio class. in all of my classes i’ve taken during my 4 years of experience, the other fellow students are so encouraging and kind- remember, we all share an interest and are fulfilling the same dream !

the adult ballet classes i’ve attended are taken seriously regarding proper technique but it’s tailored for adult bodies, there is no need to be forcing flexibility. instead strength and flexibility is built slowly and naturally to prevent injuries but there’s also challenges with new moves or sequences ! but it’s definitely not an intimidating environment at all

some tips for attending studio adult ballet classes:

🩰 be confident (dress in what makes you the most happy and do everything with confidence- even if it’s while making a mistake)

🩰 take extra care to learn the right form and the activation of the right muscles- everything else depends on this and will make you a much better dancer

🩰 add your own flare and style and have fun with it (with the position and movements of your hand & fingers, little breath accents, the tilt of your head, etc.)

🩰 don’t be afraid to ask the instructor to show the sequence again, it gets confusing and there are most likely others who also did not catch on at first. if you’re confident in the sequence, you can focus more on your technique and style rather than desperately trying to copy someone else, haha 🙋🏻‍♀️

tips for looking at the world with softer eyes:

🕊️ actively look for the good (try not to seek negative news or aspects; notice the kindness in others & be understanding when you do see the bad; notice how beautiful the world looks under the soft skies of a sunrise or how glorious the world looks when it bathes in a sunsets)

🕊️ don’t forget that we live on earth (our lives aren’t made up of only fellow humans, we live on a beautiful planet with so much beauty and life, so don’t focus so heavily on the parts that dirty the experience we have on this earth)

🕊️ look at the world when it’s the most beautiful (take a walk in the rain, watch how heavy droplets fall from the leaves of trees and how water ripples in puddles; marvel when the sun rays filter through tree branches, making you feel like you’re dreaming; watch how the moon creates halos around the clouds that hug her…)

🕊️ take a deep breath every so often, reset your mind when you catch darkness start to shroud it, remind yourself that there are bad in the world but there is so much good as well and time spent on focusing on the negatives takes away time that can be spend being content and happy with the positives

🕊️ cast away your darkness (scribble messily into a journal as if you’re ridding your negatively with each word you write- throw it away afterwards or never read back to it afterwords; take away the bad energy with an activity you enjoy- gardening, ballet, pilates, yoga, figure skating, etc.; do not let the negativity occupy your mind !)

so again thank you so much and i hope that you’re taking care of yourself too!!🤍🫧

hi snow drop, thank you so much for this kind message 🥺

hi sea foam ~ i grew up the same way and also struggle to not fulfill my childhood heart by buying unnecessary things.

some quick tips for a bigger treasure chest:

🫧 give yourself a realistic budget with a set amount of spending money each month !

🫧 prioritize spendings that are more beneficial to you (activities vs materialistic)

🫧 find smarter ways to spend your coins (second hand vs new items); and try to save up to buy quality items that will last you longer so that you won’t spend as much in the long run!

a longer read:

personally, i still splurge every month on things like ballet classes, ice skating sessions, or a yummy meal each weekend; because it’s important for me to have these joys in life. plus, i put priority on these activities that are healthy for me physically and mentally too (as opposed to spending that money for clothes or items that won’t get used often)

my method is to give myself a realistic budget based on my income and base lifestyle (rent, transportation, groceries/ personal care). after seeing how much monthly income is left, i decided how much i wanted to save up each month, and the leftover is my spending money! most of that goes towards my activities or hobbies and the leftover for if i did want to satisfy my materialistic heart, haha

i like to keep track of that free spending money by using my credit card, since i can easily monitor how much i’m using so far that month ^^ even better if you have a rewards card ! i like to save them up and later spend them on something i want or a shopping trip with friends !

thank you for existing

thank you so much, that is such an honor

ooh interesting question !

my all time favorite aesthetics:

🌱 cottagecore (dancing in the angry wind with leaves and tree blossoms floating around you, the still mornings broken by singing birds, fertile gardens and sitting amongst unruly rose bushes)

🩰 balletcore (ballet attire, knitted warmups, worn out pointe shoes, dancing in the studio alone after class, the echo of classical piano music in a dimly lit room)

📚 academia-core (quiet libraries where the the soft rustling of papers are heard, the scent of old books, mary janes with crew socks, pleated skirts, chunky sweaters, ribbons in the hair)

🐚 mermaid-core (the numbing sensation of cold water, wearing the sparkles from the moonlight and the soft crown from sunrays through the surface, moon-gazing alone at midnight, long unruly wet hair when dry but soft and flowing when swimming)

🎀 royalty-core (old ruins taken over with plants and flowers, the glow of jewels and morning mist, running through empty corridors being lit up with natural light, nightgowns and midnight reading)

hi sunshine, this is quite difficult to answer as someone who is still trying to figure themself out but here are some tips:

🎀 unlearn the rules of adulthood that have society has always instilled in us; realize that you don’t need to “act as an adult,” just be yourself and be silly, happy, and express your joys at little things

🎀 revisit old daydreams and see if you can make them a reality now

🎀 revisit old hobbies you’ve had as a child, maybe you’ll find yourself enjoying them still; or pick up hobbies you’ve always wanted to have as a child but could never do due to circumstances or finances

🎀 limit your time on social media looking at how others live their life, spend time in nature or with yourself and try to view the world with child-like eyes; notice all the details that fascinates a child, admire how petals unfurl, how little plants peek between concrete, how the sun feels on the skin on a chilly day, how you can hear trees whispering to you in the wind

i remember being younger and the day felt like it lasted a long time! i’d loooove to get that feeling back🥹 but with work and school it’s like i have no time at all…

i just want to live a lovely slow whimsical life!🤍💫🫧

time definitely goes by way too quickly as adults ! our schedules now don’t permit us to let us freely live our slow and dreamy lifestyle we want, but here are some tips to slow down our time:

🦋 it’s so hard to keep up with earthly schedules but when you do get a breather, don’t fill it up with things that are time warps (i.e. phone apps), find actives and hobbies that are mindful and require you to be present (art, garden, sports like ballet or figure skating)

🦋 try to eat meals with friends or family instead of watching yt or tv

🦋 create to-do lists for the day or journal about what you have done that day to realize the many things you have accomplished or want to accomplish !

🦋 sometimes you don’t need a goal or a project- it may make you stress about time; find ways to just relax and enjoy the day as it goes by (sip some tea and enjoy your snacks by a window, be mindful of your actions and pay attention to the details of your surroundings)

🦋 on your days off, don’t live strictly by the clock (wake up when you wake up- don’t go back to sleep !, fill your days with activities you wish to do and food you wish to eat) in my opinion, when we spend up our days with (unconscious/conscious) predetermined time schedules, we break our days up and make them feel shorter instead of letting it freely slow in its natural state !

it’s definitely possible ! don’t be fooled by societal associations with colors, pinks used to be seen as masculine !

౨ৎ wear black with the idea of ink softly rippling through water rather than chunky charcoal in it’s raw form

౨ৎ try black fabrics that are soft (chiffon, fluffy knits, soft brushed cottons)

౨ৎ wear soft flowy drapes to soften your outfit’s impression and incorporate other girly elements: satin ribbons, lace, ruffled socks, delicate jewelry

౨ৎ soft makeup and hair, bright blush tones, glossy lips, soft eyebrows, delicate lashes; hair decorated in satin ribbon, loose braids, headbands or jewelry pins

౨ৎ experiment and figure out your own personal color palette ! it seems you find yourself suited to darker colors, so maybe you might not look good in bright or white pastel pinks but perhaps try muted and more softer pinks with grey undertones !

౨ৎ also experiment with other darker colors besides black ! or try grey tones that will give a softer image together with pinks !

don’t be scared or feel limited by colors, there are so many different elements other than color involved in how your overall image is portrayed ! fabric, how the clothes drapes, makeup, hair, accessories, etc. all affect the appearance portrayal !

i work at a pretty stressful place and i work mom-fri(my wednesdays are shot days but sometimes we have meeting that basically makes it like we work a full day) and from 7-3:30pm🥺

my question is, how can i make my lifestyle more comfortable and cozy while working at this job?

we go back to work tomorrow..we had a two week break and it was good bc i got to rest and just relax for that time but now it’s time to go back….and i don’t want to be stressed and experience burnout this year anymore.

hello, busy bee ~

here are some ideas that i hope can aid you in finding peace while working:

🐝 ⋆ ˚｡⋆˚ leave work at work, switch your work brain off and give it a rest, it’s done enough for the day ! don’t think about work once you leave- it rarely solves any work problems and only gives you unnecessary stress

🐝 ⋆ ˚｡⋆˚ make your work station a safe, comfortable and cozy workspace; add a plant friend (plus plants increases productivity!), plushies, stickers on your laptop/ tech equipment(if you can)

🐝 ⋆ ˚｡⋆˚ if you find yourself stressing about work after hours, take deep breaths to recalibrate. if you still feel worried, write it down or talk to someone/ work buddy who can either listen or help with your feelings but leave work problems strictly for work hours!

🐝 ⋆ ˚｡⋆˚ have a mindless and enjoyable hobby to practice after work; listen to music, draw, paint, knit, read, cook, bake, watch something, browse blogs, etc.

🐝 ⋆ ˚｡⋆˚ know when to take a break; if you feel fatigued at work, then it’s break time ! get a snack or drink, walk around outside, etc.

🐝 ⋆ ˚｡⋆˚ find an active hobby that you enjoy to relieve stress and tension after your workday, or get home and play some calming music and stretch out your tense muscles ! let your mind and body relax without any burden… stretching after a long day definitely makes me more relaxed and have a clearer mind

ah, don’t be sorry to ask ! it’s @/petaledcheeks !

realistically, no- even if you had the flexibility and dedication, there will still be prejudice against you in the system so it would be incredibly hard to get into a company. plus, starting ballet as an adult will have you be put into an adult ballet class where the class is tailored for adults with adult bodies. the sport is demanding on the body so please do not try to force anything out of your body’s range because it will only hurt you later ! you will want to practice ballet forever, not for a painfully short amount of time.

but adult ballet is a lot of fun ! don’t underestimate how much of ballet is artistry and proper technique over impressive but unrealistic flexibility(for some people, there are literal bones in the hip that stop you). but nonetheless, ballet and stretching will definitely make your body more flexible (i still have my splits that i gained after a year of ballet when i could never do it before- even as a child). ballet was something i always wanted to do as well, and just being able to practice the sport is so fulfilling so please don’t be discouraged !

it is expensive and usually only once a week, but it’s something you can always look forward to ! if you’re in uni or plan to be, you can always see if they offer adult ballet courses which will allow you to take it more often and for free if you have scholarship to cover your tuition. usually in these classes, you learn a short choreography as well, so it’s amazing to see the skills you’ve learned be put together into an actual dance !

hello ! here 🖤 are some inspirations for Wednesday Addams

a few more ideas:

🖤 emphasis on your eyes and noticing the strange world around you

🤍 explore your curiosities, study them, note them down, draw them, etc.

🖤 embrace natural flaws like dark circles but emphasis eyes in makeup

🤍 read/ watch spooky classics, horror, and thriller books/ films

🖤 wear colors of your natural pallete (softs wear muted pastels, darks wear deep tones and darker neutrals, etc.), each character stands out with definite characteristics, including their colors !