don't touch me, sir... ahh, don't kiss me

did you hear about the door that started going to therapy? he was having a hard time opening up. :/

not gonna lie, when i saw the title "murder with my husband", i kinda thought it was a tv show where they go out and kill people sorta like as a date night activity, but it's actually just a podcast.

when someone has wrinkles that look like they're from making an angry face too much, i just expect them to be mean or angry a lot. even when an actor looks like that and is supposed to be playing a nice guy, i'm doubting it straight away.

sometimes i like to look at comments on posts and laugh cause there's always someone being like "well actually...."

growing up is realizing vegetables must have throats because the artichoke.

ice really is just water going through a hard time. 😔

i adulted twice today. almost three times. i'm gonna take a week break now from being an adult if you don't mind, thanks!

there's probably a way to opt out, but my way is better.

i inquired on one thing online and now i get 6 calls a day and voicemails. looks like i gotta change my number and go into hiding again.

i forgot to celebrate my blog's birthday yesterday. i hope he's not upset with me.