Am I the only one or calling myself a butterfly or worshipping Ana is so cringe?
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@pepsiloverrr
Am I the only one or calling myself a butterfly or worshipping Ana is so cringe?

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About my life: part 2
My sister tried so many different kinds of diets. She tried fasting, calorie counting, intermittent fasting, liquid fasting etc. It brought her to 59 kg, that was her lowest weight, for some reason in my child eyes she was still overweight even though it’s a pretty low weight for someone who is 175 cm tall. She was the first person who mentioned calories to me, I felt very smart, because I was in my 4th grade back then and I told all of my classmates what calorie are. I started looking at packaged foods and checking the number, but I had no idea what to do with the information.
One of my classmates was a girl who was very skinny, I never seen anyone as skinny as her then. She was very active and she has very good genes. In fourth grade I started to have more average body, I was very muscular, because I loved being active and I was still very fit, but because I started to grow up, I started eating more sweets, I liked savoury things too, but I mostly craved something sweet. My mom could pack me some sweet snacks for school, but they were still in small portions and I still had good lunches.
Once when I was at school, someone mentioned word 4n0r3x14, I didn’t know that word at all. I asked for the meaning and one of my classmates said “it’s just girls who are very skinny, because they don’t eat”, I don’t know what happened in my brain, but I got so interested in it, I thought about that word a lot and for some reason I started being very interested in it.
In my fifth grade our school opened a buffet. There were so many snacks, sweets, chips, candies, popcorn and other things. Everyone wanted to get something between classes and because I started getting a bit of pocket money, I sometimes bought something as well. I remember how I once bought a lot of candies for money that was given to me to pay for something else and I started crying because of it in class. I didn’t understand why did I choose to waste my money on something that I just wanted instead of something that I needed.
To this point I would still eat normally, I would eat until I felt full and if I couldn’t finish my snack or lunch, I would not care about what I eat. I like homemade food, but I also really loved treating myself with something “unhealthy”. It all started changing when I began to notice more and more how my classmates eat and what are the differences between my and others eating habits. I noticed that I steadied eating more not just than I used to, but also more than my classmates. I stopped leaving my lunches unfinished and often asked for more. I would finish my snacks and either buy myself more snacks or just ate from classmates who didn’t want to finish their food. At that moment I started slowly gaining weight. My body started developing, I was one of the first if not first girl who started wearing a bra. At that time nobody mentioned my weight, because I was still in a normal weight.
One day I decided to try not to eat for a whole day, I was holding for few hours, but then I gave in and ate more than normally. I had few attempts of not eating, but because I do not have any self control (till this day), I just never locked in.
The first time I remember what my weight was, was when I was in a sixth grade. We moved to a different house and I felt like a big change happened in my life, I started getting to school by myself and I had to start waking up on my own. I began to be more self dependent, even though I still had a lot of things I would run with to my parents. My weight was 52,3 kg and my height was 160cm then. I was shocked, I never weighed more than 46 to that point, when I weighed under 50, I would not care about my weight, I knew my weight before only because of medical checkups and now it stepped on a scale by my own will and the number frightened me. I decided that now is a time to start an action and for some reason I thought that starving is right one.
Sometimes €d saves you from alcoholism
I haven’t been active on tumblr at all… last time I was here was 11 months ago.
I want to use my account as my personal diary about the life that I’m living, I do not care about followers or opinions of others. The purpose of this blog is to open up about the life that I’m living, unloading my life problems and just finding a comfort zone and maybe even friends who might share my fears or experiences. My goal is not to motivate anyone to do harm to themselves and even if some of the things I might post about will sound negative, I do not want to give anyone an impression that it’s the way things should be done. My account will mainly circle around losing weight and my journey, so I hope that anyone who finds anything that I say triggering will stop following me or reading my posts.
About my life: part1
I was born in Europe and live there almost my whole life till the age of 19. Last year I moved with my parents to US and it was the biggest change in my life so far. I am Slavic and I see the difference in the cultures very vividly. My weight and looks have bothered me ever since I was in my adolescence. I stopped being satisfied with the way I looked around the time I went to a 5th grade. Where I lived people were always very fit and people who would be overweight were always reminded of that. In my country you wouldn’t see overweight people as often as in US. The ratio of overweight to slim people was a lot lower than it is here. In my family I never knew what it means to order dinner online or go out to eat somewhere. We were going out to eat only during some celebrations or if someone invited us. There was never a moment when I would come home and there wouldn’t be a fresh home cooked meal. My mom always made sure we had the best dish on our table, and even thought us as family members would very often not eat at the same time, we always knew that there was homemade meal waiting for us once we get home, and that’s one of the reasons why we would rarely go out to eat. Every single day I had a snack packed for my school by my mom and before I was conscious about my body image, I remember having so much food at school that I usually brought my snacks back home unfinished. Lunches at school very very different from American lunches. They were nutritiously dense, full of all macros and micros same as my mom’s food.
I was never an overweight child, I always loved sports, and I always liked being active as a normal children usually were. When I was very young, it would be hard for my mom to feed me, because I didn’t always want to eat her food. I was craving sweets, not in an obsessive way. I would eat something small candy and then wouldn’t want to eat actual food. Sugar made me very active and I would burn everything very quickly without even noticing anything. My mom had to be harsh on me sometimes, she didn’t allow me to go play before I finish my meal, very often I would Stan up from the table crying after my relatives pushed food down my throat.
Living in an upper lower class - lower middle class, I could tell that I am different from my classmates (when I started going to school). My parents wouldn’t let me participate in some kinds of activities at school if we didn’t have the money for it and don’t blame them. I know that I always had a talent for gymnastics, I asked my parents to let me go to gymnastics, but because of our financial state they wouldn’t. So I taught myself how to do a handstand, how to walk on my hands, how to do a flip all by myself. I was very proud of it. I definitely would be involved in some serious sports right now if it wasn’t for the financial situation we were facing.
As I already said, I started noticing my body when I was about 11 years old. Before that I would notice only other people and their appearance. There would be nothing that could bother me, I was a very slim maybe even a skinny child. The first moment I even heard someone say something about weight or calories was when my sister was trying to lose weight. She had problems with her weight ever since I remember her. From the moment I remember myself, my sister was always unhappy with her looks.
pls help me find my mutuals again and reblog this post if ur an 18+ ed account
got t worded last night, was keroppig1rl :,)

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A lil bc cuz I have no clue how much I weigh since I decided to weigh myself only when I’m sure that I reached my gw. I started my journey at 58kg/128lb and my first gw is 55kg/121lb, right now I don’t feel like I weigh that much, also I can’t check my weight because I don’t have a scale lmao. My sister has one tho, so I can check it when I visit.
Also my height is 162cm/5’3ft
Am I the only one who is scared of ozempic?
Like someone finally made a “magic pill” that makes you skinny, we all waited for that, but hearing about the side effects, not only physical, but also mental makes me think twice about it. Also the fact, that there is a big production of fake ozempic and even pharmacists don’t know if they’re selling you the og one and the fake one can kill you, is even scarier. I’m not gonna pay crazy money to play a Russian roulette and possibly die, I’m not that crazy. I’m not even talking about the fact that some people gain even more when they stop using it…
I haven’t weighed myself in a week or so and I decided to weight myself only when I’m sure I reached my gw. That way I’m not gonna check the numbers daily, because they usually make me binge when I’m not satisfied with them. I’d rather weight myself when I’m sure that I got to a specific number and then just weight myself again when I’m sure I reached another number.
REBLOG if you are ACTIVE this DECEMBER ✨
..and i’m looking for mutuals lol
Tips
If you exercise eat
if u don’t u can fast
but never exercise if you’re fasting
cuz then you’ll collapse and be forced to eat and not exercise
If you’re fasting for long periods of time practice harm reduction by:
Drinking A LOT of WATER
Put salt in water for electrolytes or put salt on lemon wedges for electrolytes and minerals
TAKE YOUR SUPPLEMENTS
vitamin deficiencies are dangerous and you need your vitamins iron and other nutrients to try and avoid permanent damage to your brain heart kidneys and general health
If you feel really dizzy and like your vision is going black after a long fast you’re probably gonna pass out from low blood pressure or low blood sugar
If you still feel ok enough to walk around grab some water if not then skip this part.
lay down and lift your legs
(better to lift them with something like a pillow to save energy then to lift them up in the air). take deep slow breaths.
If you managed to prevent yourself from passing out wait for your vision to get clear and your heart rate to settle then keep laying down for at least five more minutes.
After that slowly lower your legs and straighten your back to sit up and sit for 2-5 minutes
only then you can slowly get up and go eat something preferably something that contains some sugar and maybe some protein (no skinny cookies or stuff with artificial sweeteners you’ll just pass out again)
Do not purge for at least a week if you did pass out or you might do permanent damage to your heart deregulate your heart rate
Sleep a lot if you can
While fasting for long periods of time it’s important to sleep rest and just move as little as possible if you’re fasting for multiple days
Have some calories
If you’re fasting for multiple days or even weeks try to break your fast around every 3-5 days with anything between 50-300 calories to maintain some energy levels in your body and prevent yourself from collapsing.
Stay safe <3

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
No need to hurry, do it again
You’re all I see straight from my head
Adult @ñas that are active in October, reblog! Lets find mutuals ❧
Is it just me or sometimes not weighing yourself keeps you more motivated than when you can see the number? Once I step on a scale no matter what the number is, it usually ruins everything no matter if I lost or gained weight.
Also looking at my reflection is so demotivating, no matter if I look fatter or skinnier. I’m so weird for that
It’s really interesting to me how people with 4n4 are so different. Everyone has their own tendencies. You can have the same disorder and act totally differently than someone else with 4n4. For example: some people try to eat only liquid c4l0r1es and others won’t drink anything that contains them. For someone it’s so much easier to 34t one meal a day, and someone has to 34t little bit every few hours. Someone 34ts so healthy and others are 34ting small portions of the junkiest f00d possible. 34ting only in the morning X 34ting only in the evening. 34ting only when people see you X 34ting only in private.
There are so many different things that I haven’t listed, it’s so entertaining to me to watch all of 4n4 girlies being so different. Which tendencies do you have?
Reblog if you are an active 4n4 blog Nov. 24.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming