DeezFries

“You’re joking,” Chris stares at you in disbelief.

“No sir, I’m not jaurking at all. Rules are rules,” you purse your lips. “Unless she likes you, we can’t have sex.”

“But baby, she hates me!” he vehemently protests. “I don’t think I ever walked out of this house without a scratch, and I mean that literally.”

“Well, never say never,” you knowingly grin at him. “I was convinced I’d never hear you call me baby one day, but that happened, so…”

Aaaand you’re wet.

When he does that stupid thing with his stupid dimples, your brain turns off. If he adds that stupid giggle frosting on top, your heart melts.

And motherfucker knows that because the night you finally, and very much drunkenly, confessed your feelings to each other, that was word for word what you said to him!

“You wanted me to call you baby that much?” he wraps his arms around your waist.

“Are you trying to charm me into caving?” you put your hands on his shoulders.

“Is it working?” he speaks against your lips.

When does it not, though, this MOTHERFUCKER!

Every time he takes your lips within his, your spine immediately evaporates. Willpower? Nope. Feminism? Never heard of her.

But if you fold like the wettest napkin even at make-believe, then what the hell are you gonna do if you will have to stand your ground one day?

“NO!” you stop him with a smack on his peach-shaped ass. “My word is final. She either purrs on your chest, or we’re not doing it.”

“Oh, come ON!”

You quickly remove yourself from the room to go take a cold shower because you don’t believe a word of what you just said. If he kisses you for ten more seconds, you will jump him yourself, and in a very Victorian-man-seeing-an-ankle fashion. If you can survive tonight, then you can train yourself to not turn into a fucking puddle every time he blasts the puppy eyes at you. And also…

Chris might be one of the better apples of the bunch, but he’s still a man. You kinda wanna see how long it’ll take him to snap and get aggressive on the seduction.

And it’s kinda hot to think about.

Thanks to whatever stars aligned, you’ve managed to survive the night despite his sexy as hell scent, his habit of sleeping naked, and even the discreet dry humping incident. Come the morning, you pat yourself on the shoulder for a job well done, and almost wheeze at the hysterical sight of a morning wood situation going on. Though the comedy lasts for only about five seconds when you’re suddenly consumed with this urge to taste him.

You slap yourself to get it together and make a mental note of the three different wake up calls you want to try on Chris starting tomorrow morning.

After a quick shower, you get ready for work and head to the kitchen for your caffeine intake, but you don’t know what to make of the bizarre sight you’re met with. Chris is crouching on the living room floor, not moving an inch.

“Baby, what are you doing?” you cackle at the weird tactical assault position.

“Slow blinking,” he explains in lowercase letters. “I heard that’s how cats show affection.”

Oh my GOD?!

Well, no, you did not think he would actually go for it, thank you very much, but there’s your big buff Samoyed man, trying to make himself as small for your palm-sized girl as he can so he wouldn’t look as threatening. AT 7 AM IN THE MORNING!

You didn’t have any intention to actually abide by your arbitrary rule, but on the other hand, this show seems very bingeable.

Within the next few days, Chris becomes a total catthropologist, studying every single detail about Magda. Wherever he randomly runs into her, he kneels and extends his hand so she gets used to his scent. He picks up on her quirky habit of stashing hair ties all over the house, buys an entire pack to “hunt” with her, and even goes out of his way to fill up half the snack cabinet with tasty treats.

“Don’t spoil her this much!” you whine upon seeing the newest Churu pack.

“Hey, everything is fair in love and war, and this is active fucking warfare that you started,” Chris refutes, pointing at you. “I’m conditioning her to think I’m a tube machine; I don’t give a fuck.”

That evening, you finally come home after working so late, wondering what kind of hilarity you’ll be greeted by this time. At this point, you wouldn’t be surprised if you find Chris actually building a parkour for Magda.

“Hey, baby, I’m home,” you call out towards the TV sound. “Are you watching a Big Cats documentary or something?”

When you walk into the living room, your heart almost pops like a champagne.

It’s not a Big Cats documentary, but there is a bird feeder livestream on the screen. Chris has dozed off on the couch, several hair ties scattered on the floor like gigantic Froot Loops, and Magda has turned into a croissant on his chest like the fluffiest sleep paralysis demon in existence.

Oh, it’s so cute, you’re gonna DIE!

You take a short video of the wholesomest thing you’ve ever seen and snap a few pictures back to back, then head towards them, gently sitting on the couch to not disturb either. Magda instantly wakes up and moves to your lap to continue her nap. You caress Chris’s rioting curls for a while with a fond smile on your face, and eventually overcome by your excessive adoration, you place a big kiss on his forehead.

“Mm, welcome home, baby,” he greets you with a smile, then proudly declares. “I think I’ve made some progress today.”

“Yeah?”

“But I think I still have some ways to go,” he rubs his eyes and sits up. “Is it cheating if I suggestively meow at her?”

Is it weird that you suddenly want to have his babies? WHY IS HE BEING SO ADORABLE?

“Why don’t you suggestively meow at me first?” you scratch under his chin, and he immediately flinches. 

“Baby, please, I’m… I’m not…”

“You what?”

“How do I put this delicately? I’ve been, um…” he scratches his nape sheepishly, “saving all my love for you, so…”

You crack up at his choice of words and grab your phone, presenting the evidence to end his misery.

“NO FUCKING WAY, THAT DID NOT HAPPEN!” he borderline screams, scaring Magda into hiding.

“I believe the saying goes as ‘Pics or it didn’t happen’, but suit yourself,” you lock your screen.

“That means she likes me now, right? RIGHT?” he asks again just to confirm. “That has to be like third base in cat-timacy.”

“I think so,” you feign cluelessness.

“Then can we now please, but please,” he cozies up to you, “do other stuff than cuddling?

“I can’t fucking believe you,” you finally burst out laughing. “I really thought you would just go ‘fuck this’ like on day two.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” he frowns. “You told me we can’t have sex unless she purred on my chest.”

“And it’s very cute that you believed it,” you squish his cheeks, “but I had every intention of fucking you tonight no matter what because enough is enough.”

“YOU’RE TELLING ME I DIDN’T HAVE TO PUT MYSELF THROUGH THIS AND THAT AT ALL?”

“Well, no, BUT!” you point at him, “because you did, you deserve a very special treat.”

“Y–Yeah?” he instantly backpedals, loving what he’s hearing. “What–What kind of a treat?”

“Anything you want,” you whisper into his ear.

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep!” he folds in half like he’s about to cum.

“As if you’re capable of asking for something freaky,” you let out a hearty laugh. “I’ve known you my whole life. The most you’ll ask, IF you can, is maybe anal.”

“And if I ask… you’ll…” he hesitantly asks. “You’ll do it?”

“Do you want our first time to be anal?”

“I’m asking, like… hypothetically at SOME point in time but maybe like next week since it’s my birthday,” he rapid-fire raps the sentence to tackle his embarrassment to the ground. “Would you say yes?”

“If you can persuade me,” you rub the tip of his reddened ears teasingly.

“Oh, I’m gonna eat your pussy so hard, you’ll black out.”

And that’s Chris’s all-time favorite kiss. The kind where he kisses into your smile. Your laughter. Your giggles. Because every time without fail, he contracts it from you, and you end up laughing like idiots in the middle of kissing.

Every time without fail, you fall deeper in love with each other.

“Well, since I can have anything,” he tucks your hair behind your ear, “I do have a special request.”

He whispers it in your ear as if there is a crowd in the room that shouldn’t hear your intimate secrets. You can’t help but laugh again, and after giving him one last kiss, you head to the bedroom to get ready. Shortly after, you emerge again and find Chris in the kitchen doing the dishes, tightly wrapping your arms around his waist to press your breasts on his back.

He’s so excited, you can actually feel his body perk up at your touch.

“No looking,” you tickle his sides as a threat and turn him towards the bedroom door, still behind him. “Come this way, lover boy.”

The ambiance is just right with the dim lights and the scent of Chris’s favorite candles on the nightstand, and when you enter the bedroom, his heart starts beating in his ears. He sits on the bed, covering his eyes per your request. You close the door, finally ready to present yourself.

“Alright, you can look now.”

He opens one eye first, and his face immediately falls, completely awestruck. He thickly swallows and his lips part, leaving you wondering just how the heck he can breathe this heavily from only this much. He extends one hand to you to come closer, and you catwalk your way to him, clad in nothing but fishnet stockings and high heels, perching on his lap.

“Let the record show that I love and respect you very very much,” he utters staring at your breasts, excited to the point of a blackout.

“Where did that come from all of a sudden?” you snort.

“Because I’m about to fuck you like you’re my government-assigned whore.”

You let slip a little shriek through your giggles when he slams you on the mattress, inhaling your lips as he guides you both towards the headboard. You are so consumed by your lust for him that you’re about to shred his clothes to pieces. You almost cum untouched when he stands on his knees, letting you take in the overwhelming beauty of his gorgeous physique. How he looks like he’s sculpted by gods. How he looks like he’s made of marble. How everything on his body is so hard, and how his cock is leaking like it’s about to burst.

You gasp when he tangles his fingers into the fishnets and tears the fabric just around the crotch area.

“You’ve been dying to bounce on this for days, haven’t you?” he makes you palm his girth, throwing his head back when you gently squeeze it. “Had fun dragging me through hell?”

“Yes,” you shamelessly smirk at him.

“Can’t believe I’ll finally get to taste you,” he growls as he descends between your legs. “But gotta check something first.”

He puts his thumb on your mound and his pinky right under your stomach, seemingly measuring something.

“What are you doing?” you chuckle.

“Nothing,” he purses his lips. “Just reference.”

“Reference for w— OH MY GOD, CHRIS!”

He doesn’t hear the question. He doesn’t hear anything other than how you moan his name and the lewd sounds he makes on your sopping wet pussy, losing himself in the taste he’s been yearning for for years.

“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he inaudibly whispers into you. “And now all mine.”

You don’t need to hear it—you feel each and every one of those words echo in your ribcage, and they inflate your heart to a size that takes up all the space in your chest. It’s true. And now he’s all yours too.

You have never loved anything as much as you love this man.

“S–So close. Please,” you reach for his hands. “Baby, I’m almost there. A little fa— Oh, yes, like that. Like that. God, I’m gonna cum so hard for you…”

You say “for you”, and something explodes within Chris. He starts moaning into you so loudly that it’s as if he’s trying to say something through screams. You don’t need to hear it. You too would die for him in a heartbeat.

For the first time in your life, as your entire body gets shocked from head to toe, you moan an “I love you” when you cum.

Without giving you a moment’s respite, he flips you over and takes a delicious bite from your ass, ripping the fabric covering your hips completely.

“On fours for me,” he instructs with a gentle tap on your thighs, pumping himself to full hardness, then presses his tip against your oozing entrance. “Teases are the worst kinds of flirts, baby. You had this coming.”

“YES!”

He rams his cock into you, unwittingly sending himself to another dimension. He’s lost count of how many times he’s imagined this exact moment, but no matter how vividly he’s tried picturing it, it could never compare to the real thing.

“Harder,” you grit your teeth. “Go harder. I can take it.”

“Mm, good girl. Gooood girl. Learning to take your man properly,” he pulls your hair a little, grazing his teeth against your jawline. “Feels full, yeah?”

“So much,” you claw at the pillows. “So… S–So full…”

“All for you. It’s all for you. Taking it so well, my beautiful angel,” he leaves wet kisses all over your neck. “Turn around. Let me see your pretty face.”

He quickly realigns himself, but takes his sweet time sinking in, loving the way his cock disappears into you. He sucks in such a sharp breath in delight, his face all contorted, dying of how maddeningly pleasurable your pussy feels around him. He suddenly throws your legs on his shoulders and leans forward, making you whimper at the sensation.

“So fucking wet for me. Your walls are soooo swollen, baby,” he pants as he picks up his pace, fingertips sinking deeper into your flesh. “I could totally knock you up like this.”

“Trying to be my baby daddy?” you flash him a fucked out smile.

To your absolute surprise, Chris lets out a very loud exhale and throbs inside you so hard that you feel it in your stomach.

“Oh my GOD, really?!”

“SHUT UP! I’ve always wanted to be a father,” he tries to bury his embarrassment under the bed. “So what if I want it to be with the love of my life?”

“I’m…” you look up at him, on the brink of tears for no reason. “I’m the love of your life?”

“You can’t be serious,” he slows way down and lowers himself to be closer to you. “Did an entire decade we’ve known each other NOT tip you off?”

If happiness had a shape, it would be in the shape of Chris. You’re so endeared, you start laughing all of a sudden, pulling him into a kiss. You don’t even understand how that can happen. You can physically feel yourself to be at the absolute capacity of the love you can hold for him, but every time you kiss, you still fall deeper in love.

Every single time without fail.

“I love you. God, I love you so much,” he drowns your face in pecks. “You’re my everything.”

“What I’m about to say might make you shrivel like a prune, but I’m just gonna,” you blurt out.

“W–What is it?”

“I want a forever with you, Chris.”

You didn’t need to say it—he knows. He’s known all this time. But when he finally hears it directly spilling from your lips, he feels each and every one of those words echo in his ribcage, and they inflate his heart to a size that takes up all the space in his chest.

He has never loved anything as much as he loves you.

“Then it’s yours,” he holds your face. “Everything I have, everything I am, all of it is yours forever.”

“Cum inside me,” you hold onto his shoulders. “Let me have you.”

“No, cum with me,” he urges. “Go on baby, cum with me.”

Any other person in the world, and a climax is a total gamble. The odds are never in your favor because the house always wins. But when it’s with Chris, it’s terrifying how easy it is. When the man you’ve been in love with your whole life just asks for it, turns out it’s the same thing as having him devour you between your legs for hours on end. It feels like you merge into this single entity when he finally finally empties himself inside you with loud cries of your name. And you wish you could spend the rest of your life in this bed in each other’s arms, just letting him rest on your chest as much as he wants while you stroke his hair.

God fucking knows he’s been running far too fast for far too long.

When you finally come to your senses, a sound steals your attention, which alerts you that Magda is about to scratch her way into the bedroom. You welcome the cuntress in as you leave to get some water, and she immediately bolts towards the bed. When you return with a sweating glass bottle, you find her on top of Chris, shoving her tiny head into the crook of his neck.

“Oh crap, this early in the relationship, and I already have to share you?” you giggle, bursting with endearment. “I really didn’t think this through, did I?”

“Nah, it’s fine. We’ll just get a big ass doggo brother for her, and he’ll snuggle with you,” he puts out the remnants of the wildfire inside him with the ice-cold water, then threateningly points at you with his eyes psychotically widened. “Don’t even think about revoking sex until his training is complete, or I swear to god I’ll fucking riot!”

❥ Reblog & drop your feedback to co-parent a stray with Chris.

This is a one shot. There is no part two.

「© 2026, cb97percent · No translations, rewrites, or reposts permitted」

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