Pele Out Of Context

Pondering the absurd randomness of human existence

Being recognized by Guinness for his dual collections of human teeth and Hello Kitty-branded merchandise

Hawking rotisseries through a special television offer

Agreeing unwittingly to drink the blood of a pig

Commiserating with an old friend about Cecil

Subtly reminding everyone what snitches get

Saluting an officer right in his nose

Losing his balance while trying to do the Nae Nae

Volunteering as tribute to compete in the Hunger Games

Sharing the spoils after dominating a claw machine

Attending the Friars Club roast of Robert Goulet

Carrying on about his botched vasectomy

Touring a haunted house

Finding his martini not quite to his taste

Co-hosting an adult film festival

Picking up a rich, lonely old widow at the country club

Ranting about fascism inside a padded room