pee-man, the pisser

a.b.a sprite redraws

ONLY TO IMMEDIATELY START TALKING ABOUT SOME “IT’S LIKE I DON’T EXIST TO HIM” 40 MINUTES LATER. HE GAVE UP IMMEDIATELY.

booted up the game a day after the incident and the FIRST thing that happened was robo starting to develop a crush on venom. immediately after his 40-minute solo surrender

it was about here i got fed up of these games so i decided to try to subtly influence my venom mii back into the right direction

you'll never guess what happened immediately after i did that

using my SUBTLE SUBLIMINAL MESSAGING i have managed to get them to start mutually crushing over each other. they never could have suspected a thing

now GET OFF MY FOUNTAIN YOU FREELOADERS

ONLY TO IMMEDIATELY START TALKING ABOUT SOME “IT’S LIKE I DON’T EXIST TO HIM” 40 MINUTES LATER. HE GAVE UP IMMEDIATELY.

booted up the game a day after the incident and the FIRST thing that happened was robo starting to develop a crush on venom. immediately after his 40-minute solo surrender

it was about here i got fed up of these games so i decided to try to subtly influence my venom mii back into the right direction

you'll never guess what happened immediately after i did that

ONLY TO IMMEDIATELY START TALKING ABOUT SOME “IT’S LIKE I DON’T EXIST TO HIM” 40 MINUTES LATER. HE GAVE UP IMMEDIATELY.

beautiful pee-land island right. nishiki's become a bit of a favorite for me. he was actually the first islander to reach level 20. he's kind of just been living the life so far on here. i sent the gallery awhile back. he's been doing real well for himself, between his massive closet, dyed hair, and living underwater because i got bored. he's one of the most popular islanders too, scoring an impressive top 2 on the popularity ranking, as well as getting along really well with a majority of the island

it's not all sunshine and rainbows for the island's #2 fish, though. he's been down on his luck in one specific aspect:

Romance.

in tomodachi life, your islanders can try to get two of their friends together. three (3) separate islanders have attempted to get nishiki together with cynthia (of pokemon gen 4 fame), but every time they walk away from it, still just friends.

(PICTURED ABOVE: Kazuma Kiryu attempts to get Nishiki and Cynthia together)

this would come to a head when nishiki eventually got the love icon. (pictured below is nishiki kicking his feet and giggling while love icons circle his head)

unfortunately he decided to confess his love with a really bad pickup line (sorry i don't remember the specifics but like. it was dire. i winced), and he ended up getting rejected.

(i had him change outfits)

however, in an utterly unprecedented event, nishiki turned his head right back up, and decided to have another go at it. i didn't even know this event could happen prior to this.

unfortunately, cynthia did not even show up to the second invitation. nishiki fell into a depression so i let him go to cambodia. as a treat. for morale.

but there were glimmers of hope. i noticed cynthia's opinion of nishiki only went up after all that happened. kiryu would again try to get them together to no avail, but after that, a prompt showed up for nishiki, going along the lines of "why would kiryu want us together? oh now i'm curious". she even returned to him his lost mug. and like, i don't know. i was feeling pretty optimistic after that. i was very much rooting for nishiki at this point. what can i say, it was really cute. it became my crackship. i wanted to see it happen. even took this picture in the photo studio cause i thought it'd be cute

how romantic. alright. now cut to last night. i boot up the game, get my fountain donations, yadda yadda it's cool. i check out the clothing shop for the daily rotation of outfits, and i spot this.

it looks exactly like the suit he wears in yakuza 1. and i'm like hell yeah. i've had him wear a bunch of outfits so it's nice to see one so accurate (I've been waiting for a suit for Kiryu since I've added him). i get excited and get him fitted.

(PICTURE ABOVE: Nishiki wearing a fish hat underwater as well as a dashing white suit)

i'm feeling pretty good after this. i go about doing the island rounds. eventually, cynthia's problem icon pops up and i go to see what's up. it wasn't just any problem icon though. it was the big heart

as i said before her opinion of nishiki was only getting better. and i'm like, oh my god. it's all coming together. it might be happening. i'm jumping up and down. then i open the door

KAZUMA KIRYU. SHE FELL FOR KAZUMA KIRYU

I CANNOT BELIEVE IT. TOMODACHI LIFE CRASHED MY CRACKSHIP. HOW COULD I LET THIS HAPPEN TO MYSELF

AND IT WENT REALLY WELL. THEY'RE OFFICIALLY DATING NOW. STILL HAPPY FOR THEM BUT THEY CRASHED MY CRACKSHIP. STOLE IT FROM ME. RIPPED IT FROM MY HANDS. THIS IS LITERALLY WHAT HAPPENS IN YAKUZA 1 TOO WITH YUMI. WHAT THE HELL

that suit is cursed. i'm sure of it now. i gotta dye his hair back and put kiryu in the jail room now. fate never rests for the brothers. what the hell.

pictured below is nishiki immediately after this Incident (he is joined by Hatsune Miku and Sin Kiske)

i then saved the game and NISHIKI JUMPSCARE HE'S HERE TOO

i was still reeling over it, then i got curious. i headed for the beach and started up judgment bay.

19:2 ratio. i'm crying. only kiryu himself (As well as competitive Pokemon staple and famed #girlboss Landorus-Therian, who is standing behind Kiryu's massive head) still see the good in him. i'm in shambles

Here is an update on Nishiki, immediately after the failed proposal attempt.

Sin Kiske graciously thought of setting Nishiki up with someone else, and his mission ended in success! The one time someone tries to set him up with someone other than Cynthia it immediately goes well. This probably means something. I don't know. Thank Sin anyways.

It is worth calling back to the judgment bay I started up right after the Incident, where the only people who voted for Nishiki over Kiryu were Kiryu himself... and competitive pokemon staple Landorus-Therian. I was joking about it, but maybe she's been waiting for this for awhile. I wish nothing but the best.

As for Kiryu and Cynthia, both characters are now excitedly at the "want to get married" stage. Cynthia already went for it once, so I'm waiting for a second try. Maybe even one from the other side. Very excited. They really grew on me really quickly. Also wish nothing but the best. I'm glad the brothers don't have to go at it on this island. Thank you, competitive pokemon staple Landorus-Therian. And also Sin by extension

Anyways I just put up quirky questions and both Nishiki and competitive pokemon staple Landorus-Therian raised their hands in agreement when asked "Who can't stop thinking about their beautiful wife?" and I don't know what I'm supposed to make of this

CYNRYU!!!!!!!!!!!!! CYNRYU IS REEEAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!