wa-wa-wa-walnuts, peanus

hey dude, idk how much you remember from the party last night but- yeah, everyone saw your want. yeah no it was pretty late and winding down so it was quiet enough that every single person there saw it throbbing and twitching in your chest and so wet with hunger it was glistening under the kitchen light. they said it looked like it was reaching for something

too obsessive for anything casual i need to be the only one and i need you to consume me

just saw a pigeon doing the puffed up courtship dance thing to another pigeon, and as he was strutting around he suddenly stopped for a split second to do a very brief preen-peck at his own side, then returned to the strutting around. and i surprised myself by instantly losing respect for the male pigeon in that moment, like come on man i appreciate you had an itch or whatever but how is she supposed to feel special when you're getting distracted by bullshit like that? which on reflection i don't endorse, i mean those are pretty harsh dating norms i'm imposing on these pigeons, from a total outsider perspective, for no reason. probably not all girl pigeons are as uptight about that sort of thing as i would apparently be if i was a girl pigeon, maybe she even found it endearing who knows, i don't know her. it's none of my business really. sorry pigeons.

your mom jokes don't work when you know someone too well. I would never be in bed with such a wicked woman. That's not even what I had your mom saying last night. I wouldn't speak to her.

accepting the whole autism thing has actually brought me so much calm, because when I was kid everyone seemed instinctively repulsed by me and I never understood why. ESPECIALLY the adults! which is a little fucked, because who are you supposed to go to about bullying if the teacher is participating? and even my family members seemed disgusted by me on some level, so I was like a cartoon parody of a human being where my closest friends were my pet rats. but reading studies on autism now, and learning about the double empathy problem, and about how neurotypical people ARE repulsed by autistic people in an uncanny valley sort of way and DO dislike them upon first encountering them (unless, ironically enough, they’re told that they’re autistic) - that’s actually been so cathartic. especially now that I’m older and have an okay-ish handle on masking, and so am no longer live in a nightmare world where literally everyone in my life seems icked the fuck out. I don’t have to discount my early memories. I can be like ohhhhh yeah that’s just something that happens. I didn’t do anything particularly bad and it’s not that I wasn’t trying, I was just born with the cursed sigil on my forehead. like ohhhhh they were reacting to the curse, ohhh okay, cool cool, that’s actually fine. I’m actually alright with that.

ah. a nuanced story that allows for imperfect victims and portrays the confusing and contradictory nature of being human – particularly in a context that explores abuse, harassment and trauma. i wonder what people on the internet make of it... oh. oh no. oh no no no no no

Smoking on that we'd

having unwashed hair will have you believing shit like i can’t be saved