a/n: the worst writers block has hit me so this is what came of a 10 minute timer & a dream
oscar's tie felt suffocating.
he shuffled in the seat, the pew, trying to adjust his shoes that felt two sizes too tight. he wasnt even sure he was going to show up to this, but he never could say no to you.
he remembered when the envelope came into his mailbox, you had timed it for him to be able to be home and receive it during summer break. his hands shook, the cursive of his name feeling like a guillotine.
opening the envelope, sat your wedding invitation. he noticed immediately it was different than the others you had shown him on your pinterest board all those years ago, but times were different. you were different. he looked at your photo, a smile plastered on your face. god, when was the last time he had seen that smile in his direction? a year ago? two?
sitting in the pew now, he wonders what would've happened if he had rsvped no to this wedding. he glanced around, sat on your family's side of the church next to your cousin who you had told him stole one of your boyfriends in school. was this were he was resigned to? sitting with the people you invited out of obligation?
he noticed the church was different than the ones you had always talked about getting married in. the more he focused on it, everything seemed different than before. the colors— sage and beige, you had once called cliche and basic. you had said before you rather die than have colors like that, and now, they were your wedding colors. the flowers— lilies. you didn't even like lilies. you loved peonies. the draping, the bridesmaid dresses, the venue, everything was the complete opposite of what he had known you wanted.
he wiped his hands on his suit pants, trying to wipe the clamminess away, and maybe his pain too. he assumed this was his penance. his cross to bear for all the years of pining, yearning and assuming you'd be by his side forever. but the fates weren't as kind to him. while he was off focused on his career, on making it, assuming you'd be there, you fell in love with someone else. someone who wasn't him.
the crowd stands, and he stands on shaky feet. the song you chose starts to play— at last i see the light from tangled ; his brain suddenly starts to play every twisted memory of the two of you watching the movie together under covers and whispered secrets.
as you and your groom say your vows and seal it with a kiss, it feels like a mirror shattering in him. all the stolen quiet moments with you play in a blur, and he wonders if he was stronger, if he was more present, would that be you and him instead?
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