Neglect is abuse. It has the same effect on you. Being last on the priority list of people âhave other things to worry aboutâ is not how you grow up into an emotionally healthy person. You will accept being ignored and neglected because itâs whats expected of you. You will be grateful for crumbs of attention and seek for no more, no matter what. You will grow up dealing with every problem alone and learning to not reach out, not ask for help, not take away a second of someoneâs precious time for your problems that surely couldnât matter.
You learn to be quiet and invisible and to not show signs of pain. You learn to blame yourself for not speaking out, for suffering alone, as if youâre doing it on purpose. You learn to cope with being insignificant, because when youâre neglected, thatâs a given. Surely, if you were of any importance, someone would care enough to notice, to talk to you, to see if anythingâs wrong. To see if youâre drowning in depression and dissociating from the amount of pain youâre in. Surely, what youâre going thru would matter to someone. Â
People who donât care to give you attention are not people who love you and care for you. They donât raise you, they donât even learn who you are. And itâs only a matter of time before you fall into resignation and learn that being ignored and sent to the gates of hell to deal with demons all by yourself, is how your life will be. And the more dangerous part â if someone gives you predatory attention, if someone finds something they can use within you, something they can tear away for their own purposes â it will feel welcome, it will make you feel like finally, youâre good for something. Finally, someone is looking at you. Youâll welcome people who use and hurt you, because even that is better than to be completely and utterly abandoned and ignored by the world. Neglect will make you welcome abusers in your life, not only without caution, but with gratitude that even for a moment, youâre not feeling neglected anymore.
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