working alone

Raising three kids and growing up in the type of home that she had gave the redhead plenty of time to perfect her poker face, a skill that she was putting to good use right now as she made she not to let any of the rage and betrayal and hurt boiling inside of her show any of the few times Bob glanced over her way. She waits, lets him finish trying to reason with her just why he had started this in the first place before she looks away again, staring out the front window this time rather than her side, keeping him in her peripheral vision. “You were fired and you didn’t tell me,” she echoes back to the one point that really got to her the most. “For half a year, you didn’t think at any point that I should know about that. You didn’t know how to tell me because why Bob? Did you really think I wouldn’t have supported you? That I would have what? What did you think I would have said or done that made you really believe lying to me, for half of a fucking year, was the best solution you had? I’m your wife. This is the type of shit I’m supposed to help you with, Bob. We’re supposed to be partners, we’ve always been partners, but you couldn’t trust me with something like this?”

It’s as she begins to vocalize all of these thoughts that the damn begins to break, a shakiness coming into her breath and she continues on. “And then, on top of not telling me you lost your job - you decided to keep lying and go off putting your life at risk, our family at risk, without a single word to me about it. What would have happened if you’d gotten hurt? If you had been killed? And I would have had no way of being contacted? Did you ever stop to think about that? About everything you were putting at risk without consulting me first, even just listening to what I might have had to say or think about it?” she questions, fighting back the urge to cry as she did so. The tears that were threatening to come weren’t even just because she was hurt by his actions, but just the overwhelmingness of it all. Having held back on all of these feelings, this pain and anger, for so many weeks now had been hard - but she hadn’t realized how much worse it would be actually allowing herself to stop and truly feel them. “Bob, if that is what you wanted to do instead then you should have fucking come to me. I could have given you a job. I could have found a way to get you back in the field. We could have done something together.” That was what was really getting to her, not even that he was doing all of these things, simply that he hadn’t bothered or cared to actually tell her about any of it.

"I know," he fit in, "I know, I could've told you, and I should've. I don't know, Helen, I was just--I was embarrassed," Bob admitted, the first time he'd spoken the word aloud, even to himself, in this context. It was really why he'd kept everything to himself for so long, and why he'd never told his wife in the first place how his plan to stay busy had gone awry. "I took that job because I knew I had to do my part, to provide for our kids, for you, and then ... I fucked it all up, and I started to do something that wasn't getting me anything in return, except an ego boost, and by then, I didn't know how to tell you everything I'd done. I didn't think you'd forgive me, and I--I'm not even sure I deserve your forgiveness now."

If he couldn't forgive himself now, though, he surely wouldn't have been able to if something had happened to him, or one of his children, and Helen had to find out that way. In a way, that was what had wound up happening in the end, even if he did know he wasn't directly responsible for how Dash had been hurt. In truth, he hadn't thought about the consequences like that--he was Mr. Incredible, he wouldn't have been caught, or found dead. But, she was right: it could've happened, and, if it had, he might've left his wife widowed without ever getting to tell her the truth himself. He buried his head in his hands for a moment, in the image she'd painted, and, for the first time, he felt tears begin to fall. Honestly, he hadn't wanted her to get him a job, and it was exactly what he feared she would offer. It was silly, but for once, he'd wanted to do something himself, and it had gotten the best of him. "I didn't want you to get hurt because I was missing it," he argued as he lifted his head, wiping beneath his eyes frustratedly. "And I didn't want you to have to go find a place for your husband who'd gotten sacked. I didn't want to have to ask for your help, but ... I'm sorry that I didn't."

But now here they were, driving to Helen didn’t even know where in complete silence before he finally parked the car. The entire ride, her eyes had remained glued out the window, watching the island she’d known her entire life pass by in a blur as she tried to predict just how this was going to go. The thought of things not being okay in the end between them wasn’t one she could handle even briefly allowing to pass her mind - that wasn’t an option as far as she was concerned. But she also had no clue how they were supposed to move past this, how things could ever go back to the way they’d been before now that she knew just how much deception Bob was actually capable of. “How long?” was the first and only question that came out of her mouth, still unable to quite look at him. It was the one unknown that had haunted her over these past few weeks, more than anything else, the simple question of just how long this had been going on. How long had he been actively lying to her, each and every day.

It wasn't right after that Bob had turned to being an undercover super again, but the turnaround hadn't been longer than a week or so before he'd decided what to do with all his free time. "I was applying to jobs, and ... I don't know, I'd always kinda listened to the police scanners every now and then, for fun. I thought, y'know, I'm not doing anything else, while I'm waiting for places to get back to me and, so, I just ... I fell back into it. I started doing that in, I guess, February." He paused, glancing to her to gauge any sign of a reaction. "I promise, if I'd gotten a job, a real one, I would've taken it. But, none of the places in the beginning had gotten back to me, and I never found anything else to apply for that I was really into, but ... obviously, now, I'm just gonna take whatever I can get."

And again, his offer to do whatever she wanted or needed of him should have been a comfort - a reminder of just how great of a guy he really is, a fact that Helen already knew, deep down, even if she had briefly questioned it moments before. But all it did was cause the knot in her chest to tighten even more. He loved her, that much she also knew to be true, despite all the lies and secrets. And that honestly only just made all of this so much harder. It’d be easier to accept everything he’d done if she could write it off as just another man doing whatever he wanted without any care for anyone else. But that’s not true, and she knows it. He cares, he cares so much - for her and their family. It’s clear even now as he tries to think of ways to help her adjust and deal with everything that had blown up in their lives just a few hours ago. She hadn’t even thought of their youngest son, her mind far too focused on first Dash and now all of this. “Let's give it an hour or two, see if anything changes before either of us go anywhere. I’m not leaving this hospital until they’re certain he’s stable. Violet can watch Jack-Jack if he needs to go home, at least until they have anything new for us.”

Things could've been better, to say the least, for Bob and Helen since he'd been caught in his lie. They'd agreed to remain cordial while their children were still in mental and physical recovery, which had left the topic Bob was so eager to simply rip the bandage on unspoken for longer than he'd hoped. But, now that Dash was back on his feet, literally, Bob had figured it was safe enough to at least ask about addressing the elephant in the room. With the constant presence of their children in the house, he'd suggested that they take a drive, and it was here, in the parking lot beside the boardwalk, that he parked with no intention of getting out.

It was an entirely unfamiliar feeling, that he could lose her. Bob had never done anything so egregious that had gotten him in so much trouble with anyone in his family, nevermind his wife. They'd never fought this deeply before, never even having much more than a spat every now and then like he thought normal married couples did. This, though, was far beyond the levels of fucking up that Bob ever intended, though he should've seen it coming. He'd had so many opportunities to come clean, and still, this was where he'd ended. "I don't know ... uh, how to, y'know, if you wanted to start, you can. Or, I can, if you want, I just--I thought I should offer, if you had any questions."

A call from Arthur had interrupted Bob’s attempt at starting whatever conversation he was going to pull out his ass, and she had been thankful for the distraction, excusing herself to answer the phone and also grab another cup of vending machine coffee. The call in its entirety had only been a minute or two, just a check-in and updating her on what he’s heard from the rest of the Order so far tonight, but Helen took her time stirring in her cream and sugar. But there was only so long she could stay away before it became obvious she was avoiding him, so after another minute or two she finally made her way back over to their table and retook her seat across from her husband. Of course he decides to jump right into the mess of it all as soon as she sits back down. The grip on her styrofoam cup tightens and there’s a splash of coffee that drops onto the tabletop as she tries her hardest to keep from exploding right then and there.

“I don’t want to hear it,” she states instead, voice even as ever despite the raging turmoil of her inner emotions. “Our son is in surgery right now, for the bullet that he took to the chest. He could die at any moment and we have absolutely no control over it… There’s already official records of his injuries, so I can’t even call in a healer for help without raising even more suspicions on the rest of the kids.” All statements that she was well aware that Bob already knew, but still ones that felt important to reiterate right now. “So no. We will not be discussing the fact that you have been lying to me for god knows how long - that you have been putting your life and our entire family’s safety on the line for again, god knows how long. We will not be discussing the hundreds of chances you likely had to tell me all of this or the fact that if you had, I would have done my best to support you - offered you the resources you may have needed to remain completely under the radar and stay safe. We will not be discussing the way you so clearly think so little of me that you felt this was something you had to hide, that you may have just completely broken all of the trust I’ve had in you our entire twenty-plus years of being together. We will not be discussing any of it.”

Throughout her entire little speech, Helen hadn’t once glanced up from her coffee, unable to look Bob in the eyes and know everything she was saying had been true. That he had been openly and actively lying to her for potentially up to years now. However even without looking at him, her words were enough to bring a few stray tears to her eyes and she finally let go of her cup to reach up and wipe them away, shaking her head as she did so. “No, I can’t. Right now, Dash is the one that needs us - that needs me. So I can’t go losing the very fragile control I have over myself by opening up any of those conversations.”

What he couldn't stand to hear, though, was that Helen thought he'd kept this from her for so long because she thought he didn't think much of her. In fact, his reasoning for hiding it from her was practically the opposite. "Helen, I don't--are you kidding me? I don't think little of you at all, I thought ... I don't know, I was afraid of what you would think of me because I can't--I haven't let go." He was supposed to have grown up by now, to have let go of who he'd been before he had a whole family to provide for and worry about. Maybe, had he not taken his eye off his son, he would've been able to do something to protect him, instead of worrying about keeping his identity hidden while helping other people.

Bob could only nod his head silently, accepting that their focus should be on Dash right now. She was right: that's where they had to keep their attention. They could talk later, but anything could happen to their son at any minute. "Okay," he replied simply. "You're right. Do you ... you know what, whatever you need, uh, from me. I can stay the night, if you want to go home with Jack Jack, we can take shifts. Just--whatever I can do, Helen. I love you, and I'm just ... I'm so sorry. I just need you to know that." He reached for her hand, only hardly outstretching his own, but instead grasped his coffee cup--Bob couldn't stand to think that he might make things even worse.

“So… all of this was for his soccer team?” she repeats, still trying to wrap her head around it. Sitting up out of her husband’s arms, she remains on the couch but pulls away ever so slightly. Not because Bob had done anything wrong, she just simply needs a bit of space to think this all through. “That is horrific. And then he lied to her when she asked about it? How long was he going to let it go on for? Where would he even come up with an idea like this? I know he’s always been competitive, but this is a new level. And for a team he doesn’t even actually play on.” Perhaps she shouldn’t be as upset about it as she was, but Helen can’t help it. It was such a horrible thing to do to anyone, especially someone as sweet as that Lil girl, and it almost made her feel a bit sick that her own son was even capable of doing such a thing.

He gave her a nod of confirmation, coupled with a roll of his eyes in agreement over how ridiculous this sounded. "Yeah, I know. I think it went on for a few months, at least? I don't know how long he was going to let it go for if she hadn't found out, though." Despite his mistake, Bob could tell that his son had known that he'd made a mistake--he could tell from the sadness in his eyes when he'd confirmed that he had, in fact, cared about the girl whom he'd hurt. "I think he regrets it, though. It sounded to me like they had a really good thing going until she found out. But, I can't imagine she'd ever get back with him after this." And, for what it was worth, he couldn't really blame her, either.

Dash knew his dad was right, no matter how many things he tried to keep secrets from his mom and his sister, they could usually sense something was off. He could get away with some things but nothing came close to the scope of lies he’d kept recently. Dash sighed as he lay down on the couch with the ice pack held up to his face. “No, breaking up was something that happened because I’m an idiot. And I know we joke about me being one but I think at this point, it’s safe to say it’s accurate.” This introspection found itself less confident than it usually did, but everything had gotten back around to knock Dash down and he only had himself to blame for this. He felt the need to make his team win and so he thought up some convoluted plan to distract Lil; He lied to her about his intentions all in the name of making himself seem as great as he wanted to come across; and his lack of commitment left him shy of a relationship that would have worked under the right circumstances. “It could’ve been really good.”

"Hey, no, you're not an idiot." No matter how much he'd joked about it, throwing the word around in the past when the argument could be made that Dash was, in fact, just that, it felt different to hear his son call himself that, and mean it. "Well, maybe you could tell me what happened, and I'll be the judge of that," Bob added, nudging his shoulder with a hint of a smile, hoping to get one out of his son, too. He could tell that he cared about this girl, regardless of what he'd done or didn't do to make it work. Call it old-fashioned, but Bob believed that where there was a will, there was a way to make things work. At least, he believed that for now, still not knowing the full story of what Dash had done. "It still can be. Just give it some time, let her cool off. If it's meant to be, it'll come back to you, yeah?"

And then hearing what her son had done to warrant being punched in the first place, well it made even more sense. Though with the admission, Helen no longer cared about what the Deville boy was like, her focus fully returning right back to Dash and his own behavior. “He lied to her? Multiple times? About what?” she asks, even though Bob had made it clear he didn’t fully know the answer to that. A frown formed on her face as she thought about how much of a little shithead it seemed her son was being. “Oh that’s so disappointing. It had to have been something big too, for the brother to get upset about it. Do you think he was cheating?” It was the first thought she had and honestly, the one that made the most sense given everything she knew at the moment.

"He didn't tell me all the details, but, from what he did say, he basically came up with this plan to win her over so she'd be distracted enough to stop caring about her coaching and his team could beat hers," he explained with a sigh, finding it even more ridiculous now that he spoke it aloud. "And, she thought something was up, because she's a smart girl, and he told her there wasn't. Long story short, he'd told a friend about it, whose girlfriend so happens to be one of Lil's friends, so that's how the word got back to her."

Even though she'd grown up, the child in her still came out when she was home. Her father had been the more fun of her parents and she couldn't deny that it was hard to say no to him. She had fond memories of the nights when Mom was away, Dash was a baby, and it was just them. He would order a Hawaiian pizza with extra cheese just how she liked it then they'd spend the night playing board games before falling asleep on the couch watching movies. Violet still remembers him carrying her up the stairs and tucking her into bed, wishing life was still that simple. Once Dash started to get older and Jack was born, things changed, not to mention the fact that they were all supers. As soon as the kids discovered they had powers life around the house became more interesting and Violet began to rebel. She wanted to disappear her entire life then finally, she could. "Yeah right, you always said you were but I think you lost fair and square," she replied following behind him. "I'll take one if you're offering." A beer with her dad was one of the simple pleasures of adulthood. She was already digging through the cabinet to find the game when he asked how things were causing her to respond into the void of forgotten puzzles and game boxes. "Uh, not really. Same old, same old, you know how it is." In all honesty, Violet hadn't experienced anything worth updating him on in weeks, her life being boring if she didn't talk about what she did in the Order. If she opened that can of worms she'd have stories to share but didn't dare put her family in that position. "There was a small fire in the office the other day, actually," she said with a laugh as she turned around, Yahtzee in hand. "Some guy had a hot plate at his desk and the thing totally blew the fuse. It was actually pretty hilarious watching them all run around like the place was going down. All we had to do was pour coffee on the thing and it was out."

“No, he’s evaded giving me any real answers,” she admits, adjusting herself on the couch so that she could face her husband as she hoped to finally get some kind of truth behind Dash’s blackened eye. The corner of her lips quirk up at Bob’s threat to get revenge for their son’s injury - the redhead likely wouldn’t have gone to the same length… if only because she had a feeling deep down that whatever the reason had been was likely a good one. And that suspicion was confirmed when her husband finally admitted that it was over a girl. “A girl? Do you mean Lilian? She did this?”

Bob let out a laugh at his wife's suspicion, only briefly relishing in the thought of Lillian having been the one to leave a temporary mark on Dash's face. He shook his head at her as he chuckled, despite wishing it had been true. "No, it was her brother. The guy apparently went to his apartment and gave it to him, and Dash actually thought he deserved it," Bob admitted, still feeling impressed by his son's acceptance of responsibility for his actions. "He said he, I don't even know, lied about something a long time ago, when they first started dating, and then, she confronted him about it, and he lied again. Somehow, she found out the truth, which, I told him, women always do." Bob pressed a kiss to his wife's hair in hopes to hide the guilt he was holding, having been lying to her for some time, too. But, now wasn't the time to admit to that. "Apparently, they broke up before that, though."

Though telling the truth was, as always, the right choice to make, he didn’t want to give away too much that would’ve left his dad too disappointed in him right off the bat. So for right now, he chose to keep his answer vague, deciding as he would go on when he should reveal some truths, “I lied to her about something I did months ago and then lied to her again when she confronted me about it, and now she knows the truth so she’s deservedly pissed at me.” There were many faults at various points that fixing could have saved Dash from the consequences he now had to deal with, but they were far gone, leaving him with no choice but to move on. “I don’t even blame her brother for punching me, I deserve it, I think. We already broke things off before she found out because of a completely separate issue but yeah that’s kind of what’s been going on.”

Bob nodded his head slowly as Dash confessed, processing what he'd said. Helen was far better with things like this, but it had been him who'd been given the key to all the information, and the last thing he wanted to do was say something stupid to screw that up. Though his son's answers were vague, they were clear enough to see that he'd hugely messed things up with the girl who he really did seem to like. "Well, you know, lying's never a good thing, especially to a girl. Believe me, women are way smarter than we are. I don't know how, but they can tell when you're hiding something. They always figure it out. I learned that one the hard way with your mother," he admitted, pointedly ignoring that he himself was lying to his wife right now about other matters that didn't need to be brought up in front of Dash. "I don't, either, if you think you deserved it. But, the real question is, did you want to break it off before all of this, or did you just really mess something good up?"