Characters are from: @panic-at-the-disboard-cp
Corn // Ignorance is Bliss
Nine people living in the same home. Nine mouths to feed. And all the burden of making sure everyone has been eating good and not destroying the kitchen falls on one person. And he’s currently trying to brainstorm what the fuck he’s gonna feed everyone tonight when the kitchen is empty.
A silver-haired woman sat on the counter, eyes glued onto the man as he paced all around the kitchen mumbling things to himself as pantries were being opened and closed repeatedly, hoping something else would just magically appear inside at some point.
“Dude don’t get too pressed about it, I’m sure they can do without dinner” The woman spoke, her head tilting to the side slightly as she eyed the frantic movements coming from the man looking for ingredients as the time for dinner approached.
Opening one of the pantries for the third time, he spoke. “They’ll riot, Commie, if I don’t give them food, someone else will become the food” He sighed as he closed the pantry and turned towards the counter where the woman, Commie, sat.
“Good point... What about the freezer? Have you looked in there yet?” She looked past the spot where the man stood and stared at the fridge and freezer with a curious expression. He shrugged and walked towards the appliances, silently praying that there is something inside before hesitantly opening the freezing compartment up.
And there it sat. A big bag of frozen corn. He stared at it for a solid thirty seconds before turning back to the now grinning silver-haired woman that found herself standing right behind him instead of sitting on the counter like before.
Commie’s expression was almost taunting, New Guy looked back at the bag of frozen corn and then at the grinning woman again. “I am not cooking this” He deadpanned, but Commie’s expression didn’t falter. “It’s either that or you’ll wake up toe-less and outside of the vents” She joked. Or was it a joke?
With a sigh, New Guy took the bag out of the freezer and closed it, walking past Commie and setting the frozen corn next to the microwave. “Woah, hey, what are you doing with that?” A third voice entered the room, causing both Commie and New Guy to look at the source of the sound, it was Red.
“Oh hi, Red-” “Making dinner” As Commie’s attempt at greeting the new person in the kitchen was interrupted by the man’s quick and straightforward response, the microwave door was opened, and suddenly everyone’s attention was on that. Commie’s eyes looked at the microwave then at Red as if to double-check they both thought the same thing.
“I- New Guy you don’t cook frozen corn on the microwave” Red’s tone was slightly hesitant and was tinted with a slight hint of confusion to it. “Yeah Alex, no idea what you’re doing but you’re meant to boil that” Commie’s spoke with a tone seemingly dumbfounded by what she assumed would be New Guy’s next actions.
He tilted his head and stared at both of them in confusion, opening his mouth slightly to say something only to be interrupted by yet another new person entering the already kinda cramped kitchen. “Yooo, we’re eating corn?” The new person, Doc, spoke as she eyed the bag of corn sitting next to the microwave.
“I guess, hey Doc, you’re meant to microwave this, right?” New Guy asked the girl as she took her earphones off and deadpanned him. “Who the fuck said I wanted my corn defrosted my man” Everyone stared at Doc for a second before a small ‘profanity’ was muttered by the man standing next to the kitchen appliance.
Commie walked towards the stove and took a pot out of a drawer next to it, filling it up with water before setting it on the stove-top and turning the fire on to start boiling the water. “This is how you cook frozen corn, Alex” The woman spoke as she took the bag of corn and dumped its contents inside the pot, leaving a bit of it still frozen and inside the bag for Doc.
Minutes passed as the corn boiled in the pot and Red and Doc dealt with New Guy’s occasional glares when they moved something or touched something that he has cleaned before they arrived. He liked his space to be neat dammit. Soon though, the corn was ready to be served, and everyone would have to scatter to the table eventually.
“Alright, that should be enough time, Commie could you pass me some bowls?” New Guy spoke as he turned the fire down and eventually off, not noticing Commie’s confused expression and lack of movement. “B-bowls? You mean cups, right?” The room fell silent. The man turned at the questioning voice and stared.
“Cups?” He spoke, his expression being a confused one, borderline concerned as Doc and Red both stared at the exchange. “Yeah, you serve corn in cups, that’s how you do it” Commie responded, genuinely believing what she said.
They both stared at each other, both dumbfounded for different reasons. “What’s taking the dinner so long, Gates is insisting in coming in here to check up on it” Someone else walked into the room, breaking the almost staring contest and directing herself towards New Guy, it was the Manager.
“Gates is gonna do what-” “Emi is corn served on a cup or a bowl?” New Guy’s questioning was now interrupted by Commie, oh how the turns have tabled.
The Manager looked at them both before answering. “Y’all eat corn?” Her tone was a confused one, genuinely asking if people actually ate corn on the regular. It was a dead-silent staring contest between everyone, no one entirely sure what the fuck was going on.
“Times up fuckers where’s the food!?” A yell was heard and someone entered the room, a blonde-haired lady coming into the kitchen and instantly making New Guy’s blood pressure spike as fear of the kitchen, his kitchen, getting destroyed filled him whole.
Behind her were three other women, one holding a camera and pointing it at Gates, the blonde-haired girl who had just entered the place. “Nononono- Out of the kitchen, this is off-limits, all of you!” New guy quickly spat out as he motioned everyone to leave his kitchen.
“jUST PUT THE CORN ON A CUP ALEX” Commie basically yelled, New Guy responded. “nO IT’S SUPPOSED TO BE EATEN ON A BOWL” He yelled back, not expecting a response from the other parties that surrounded them. “yOU MONSTERS EAT IT HOT JUST CRUNCH THE FUCKING ICED CORN” Doc retaliated, the whole place was a bunch of yelling and intense arguing, it was chaos.
But someone was away from the spotlight, someone stood to the side, she smiled. The Manager smiled at the sight, the chaos, the yelling, the argument. She knew it was all fun and games, nothing serious, and yet, there was something else in that smile.
She took a small box out of her coat, flicked a small stick against it, threw it inside the oven that had the gas running on for a while. A small, tiny explosion occurred in the inside of the oven, the fire inside almost reaching the people standing by it. Someone ran to get the extinguisher. To everyone, Gates just pulled off one of their many fire incidents.
Except to someone, the camera had been pointing at her the whole time, the hooded woman saw. But she knew better.
