PandaWritesPoorly

Tikki has been around from the very Beginning.

She is present for the creation of all living things, and always will be.

Many believe that, for those reasons, she knows Life better than any being. That to see it and feel it everywhere allows her to know it on a deeper, more meaningful level.

She could not disagree more.

She believes she will never truly be able to feel, to understand, to know LIfe in its truest form.

Life may fall into her domain as Kwami of Creation, of Good Luck, but Life is more than just its beginnings. More than Creation.

Her Bugs. Oh, her precious Bugs, they are eternal proof of that.

Beings that know of the miraculous agree with that sentiment, but for all the wrong reasons. It is believed that her Bugs, her children, will live long lives. They will live as long as their human lifespans will allow.

But that couldn’t be more wrong.

They live and breathe with everything they are, wherever they go. They are alive in every sense of the word. Until they aren’t.

The universe never seems to have space for so much life in one person.

And that is precisely why her Bugs will know Life better than she could ever hope to.

Because the beauty of life does not come from it’s length, but its contents. From the impact that you make.

It’s the knowledge that you only have so much time that pushes you to live. It is a wonderful and beautiful gift to be alive, but it is not meant to be permanent.

What better way to truly understand what it means to Live and be alive than to live and breathe at your fullest knowing full well that it could be taken from you any second. Life is precious, and its meaning comes from its promise of ending.

She’s there at every Beginning, but she’s there at every Ending.

Her bugs die in battle, more often than not. They give up their gift to preserve that same gift for many others.

Their Cats, their partners, perhaps meant to succeed where her Bugs didn’t, to have a long life, scoff at that intended fate. They know the beauty of Life because they stood by its side until it died in their arms.

And because they know it, they do not fear death. They lived and breathed with Life itself, and they know they lived just as deep.

They are Destruction, so why should they fear Death?

So blinded by their loss, they do not see they are often throwing away the very thing they always intended to protect.

And when its over, the universe is left reeling from not one, but two premature deaths. Two bright and beautiful stars put out before they were done burning.

Humans pull from that leftover fuel and immortalize the lives lost in the only way they know how.

Stories.

There’s a reason so many Cats and Bugs become the characters in legends and figureheads in history. Because humans can see that the story wasn’t over, and they draw out that life as best they can.

It’s not a replacement. Nothing can ever replace the pricelessness of a Life, no matter how small or short.

But it’s something, and it lets that Life live on a little longer and a little stronger than it would have otherwise.

It’s a cycle she’s forever confined to.

She goes from one human to another, on and on until Time ends, only for their time to end to be cut short, to be cut away from her.

The pain she shares with Plagg. A good life cut too short, too soon.

She’s never numbed herself to that pain, but she doesn’t want to. To do otherwise would be an insult to what they were and what they left behind.

Every time that box opens, every time she’s given a new wielder she throws herself into loving them. She doesn’t waste a moment in appreciating the gift that has been given to her. To them. She loves them with everything she is from the moment she meets them.

And she knows it will end in loss and indescribable grief, but it will be entirely worth it because each of her Bugs are incredible and unique.

And they are glorious.

So, Tikki, Kwami of Life, Creation, and Good Luck knows. She knows she will never truly live.

But she knows the beauty of Life, and she knows it well.

---

Author’s Note: I hope this doesn't come across as me romanticizing death/martyrdom/dying young. Life is precious and that includes everyone reading this!

The reason this fic is so centered on lives cut short is, once again, my dog. As mentioned in the precious work of this series, he died (back in June). He was only four. We adopted him in February. I spent longer writing With Time than I did with him in my life, but he still made an impact, as I'm sure any pet owner can understand. It doesn't take much time to fall in love.

I hope you're all staying safe, and give your pets some love for me!

Ladybug and Chat Noir stare at each other in frozen shock as their transformations time out. They’d both chosen the same alley, and there was no time to switch.

And suddenly it’s Marinette and Adrien in the alley, Tikki and Plagg watching silently.

“I-” Marinette chokes out. “I’m so sorry. I have to go.”

She rushes out without another word, her head down and shoulders drawn up as she brushes by Adrien. The blond lifts a hand toward her when she goes by, but pulls it back to his chest. He watches her go, then turns and walks the other way.

--- 

Tikki watches her Chosen sadly. The girl had rushed straight home and flopped onto her bed without another word. Not crying, but definitely shaking.

“Marinette, talk to me,” she prompts.

“What is there to talk about? He hates me now!”

“Why would he hate you?”

Marinette sits up, pushing herself off her pillow, then gestures at herself. “Because I’m me. Ladybug isn’t some hero! She’s just me.”

“You said the same to Chat Noir a while ago. What did he say then?”

She pauses, then looks away. “...he said we’re the same person.”

“And?”

“And he wants me to learn how to appreciate that.”

“So do you think he would hate you now? Just because he knows who you are?”

“Yeah, because I’m Marinette.”

“I disagree. How does Adrien feel about Marinette?”

She opens her mouth to say something about he probably couldn’t care less about her, then actually thinks.

And realizes, that at least in her mind, they’re actually friends. Adrien - socially deprived child that he is - probably would agree wholeheartedly with that statement.

She falls backwards onto her pillow, covering her face with her hands. “Oh nooooo, I’m an idiot.”

“You were overwhelmed by what happened. I don’t think that makes you an idiot, I think it makes you human.”

“An idiot human,” she groans. Then her body goes rigid, and she flies up, scrambling for her phone. “Oh no! He thinks I hate him!”

Tikki sits back. For now, her job is done.

 Marinette: oh my kwami im so sorry

Marinette: i shouldnt have run off like that

Marinette: im honestly really happy that its you

Marinette: it was just so much at once and i was worried you would hate me and didnt want to see that because youre really important to me and im so so sorry

 Adrien: yeah it definitely stung

Adrien: but plagg reminded me about your feelings about your identity so i kind of figured it had to do with that

Adrien: still had me worried though

 Marinette: i know i know im so so sorry

Marinette: um maybe we can meet up for patrol later to talk

Marinette: give us both some time to process

 Adrien: sounds like a plan princess

---

When Chat Noir lands on the roof, he’s immediately tackled in a tight hug by Ladybug. He barely manages to keep from falling over.

“I’m so sorry, mon minou.”

He returns the hug with a smile. “It’s okay, I understand.”

She finally steps back, looking at him with teary eyes. “No it’s not. I hurt you, even if you understand what happened now…”

“You aren’t, um, upset that it’s me, are you?”

“No!” Ladybug grabs his hands. “Never! There’s no one else that I would want to be my partner!”

“Okay.” He smiles. “Then I’m okay. No more apologies, m’lady.”

She looks as though she’s about to argue, then lets out a deep breath. “Fine. If that’s really enough, I’ll stop apologizing.”

He sits down against a wall, patting the spot beside him.

She sits there, smiling for a moment before it fades. “And, um, you aren’t… disappointed it’s me?”

Despite knowing how she feels about herself, he’s still surprised at how she can’t see how amazing she is. “Absolutely not. You’re wonderful, Bugaboo, your being you only makes you doubly awesome. I purr-omise.”

She gives him a small, but bright smile at that, then smacks him gently on the shoulder. “That was an awful pun.”

“Claw-ful?”

She giggles. “No!”

“Won-fur-ful?”

“Absolutely not!”

“Hiss-terical?”

“Nope.”

“Claw-ver?”

“Nuh-uh.”

“Purr-fect?”

“Kitty, I am paw-sitive that that was far from your purr-fect pun.”

He gasps in delight. “You punned!!”

“I shouldn’t have. Now you’ll never stop bugging me about-”

He gasps again, and it clicks.

“Hey wait! That one wasn’t purposeful!”

“Purr-poseful,” he whispers. His eyes are shining, and there’s a wide smile on his face.

“I’m just going to stop talking.”

He hugs her tightly, and she returns it begrudgingly. After a moment, he finally says, “Hey, does this mean we should delete that app?”

She hums. “Maybe we can just use it for hero business now.”

“Sweet.”

“You just liked the dumb nicknames, didn’t you?”

“Purr-haps.”

“I’m ignoring that, but we can change each other’s names to some equally horrible nickname for normal texting.”

“Even better!!”

Ladybug leans her head against his shoulder and smiles. “I’m glad it was you,” she says softly.

He leans his head against hers and takes her hand. “I’m glad too. I couldn’t ask for a better partner.”

She fights the blush rising on her face. “Neither could I. Partners, with or without the masks?”

He pauses. “And.”

She furrows her eyebrows. “What?”

“Partners, with and without the masks.”

A smile breaks across the girl’s face. “I like it.”

---

Author’s Note: Well, what do you think? I'm pretty pleased with it, though maybe one day I'll rewrite this. I don't know.

Now that this is finished, I'm going to try and post a one-shot about once a week - though that's very loose (trying to go easy on myself). For now, A Shy 'Sparrow' is on hold. I want to finish writing it before I start posting it again.

It's been lovely to be back and see you guys again! 💕💕💕

Marinette sits up when she hears a notification from that app. She and Chat had found a messaging app that they could both use without revealing their identities, and had been using it to communicate without having to transform.

It was already hard enough to sneak away for attacks, they didn’t need to make it more complicated.

It’s just a quiet study hour in the library, and she’s alone, so she pulls out her phone.

 Cat Boy: hey bug

Cat Boy: weird question

Cat Boy: do you

Cat Boy: do u think that i weigh 2 much

 Little Lady: no!

Little Lady: not at all kitty

Little Lady: underneath all that armor and magic leather im pretty sure your waist is the same size as mine

Little Lady: if anything you dont weigh enough

Little Lady: im bringing snacks on patrol

Little Lady: this is non negotiable

Little Lady: text me ur favorites

Little Lady: but later. what brought this on

 Cat Boy: just civilian stuff

Cat Boy: i know i’m not overweight

Cat Boy: but seeing the numbers andstuff all the time it can kind of stick in ur head you know

Cat Boy: and then u start thinking about it

Cat Boy: and it sticks around longer

 Little Lady: and then it’s taken root

 Cat Boy: yeah

 Little Lady: then we have some weeding to do >:(

 Cat Boy: :)

Cat Boy: thanks bug

 Little Lady: not a problem

---

Little Lady: do i do enough

Little Lady: like

Little Lady: all of this

Little Lady: is it good enough

Little Lady: paris and the kwamis and the akumas and hakwmoth

Little Lady: shouln’t I have fixed all of this bu now

Little Lady: it’s what im here for

Little Lady: but theres sill so much wrong and i feel like im not enough right to cancel it all out

Little Lady: and i just

Little Lady: i feel so bad

Little Lady: but half the time i dont even kno what i fel bad about u kno

Little Lady: i jsut fell bad

Little Lady: abuto evryting

Little Lady: o goodenss it 3 am

Little Lady: sory

Little Lady: ignreo tihs

 Cat Boy: bug

Cat Boy: breathe

Cat Boy: five things you see

 Little Lady: pilwo phonoe tiki cieling um

Little Lady: blankt

 Cat Boy: four things you feel

 Little Lady: bed

Little Lady: pilow hair sheets

 Cat Boy: three things you hear

 Little Lady: cars wind and keyboadr clicks

 Cat Boy: two things you smell

 Little Lady: the candle i had burning and bread

 Cat Boy: bread?

 Little Lady: bakery nearby

 Cat Boy: oh okay

Cat Boy: one thing you taste

 Little Lady: cookies

 Cat Boy: there we go

 Little Lady: thank you

 Cat Boy: no problem

Cat Boy: do u want to talk

 Little Lady: later. maybe on patrol?

Little Lady: i’m tired. haven’t slept all weekend

 Cat Boy: …

Cat Boy: bug it’s MONDAY

Cat Boy: wait no

Cat Boy: TUESDAY

Cat Boy: go to bed

 Little Lady: goodnight kitty

 Cat Boy: gn littlebug

 Today 9:32 AM

 Little Lady: hey! im not that much shorter than you!

Little Lady: >:(((

--- 

“Are you sure, Lila?” Adrien asks, a frown creasing his face. “That doesn’t sound like something Marinette would do.”

“Well I-”

“My dude’s right,” Nino agrees, “That doesn’t sound like Nette at all.”

Adrien watches Marinette brighten quietly as the rest of the class comes to her defense. They all believe Lila still, yes, he’s not going to let the liar turn them on their Everyday Ladybug. Not on his watch.

After class, the dark haired girl approaches him. She gives him a soft hug, whispering a quiet ‘thank you’.

---

“Adrien,” Marinette calls.

The blond stops, turning. “Hey, Marinette. Did you need something?”

She shakes her head, giving a small smile, holding out a paper bag. “You were gone all morning for that photoshoot. I thought you might be hungry.”

Adrien freezes, staring at her in shock.

After a moment, she cringes, looking away. “B-but um, if you aren’t-”

He shakes his head, realizing his mistake. “No! No! Thank you so much! I just- You surprised me.” He gives her a grateful smile, trying to keep himself from crying. “I- that- I wasn’t expecting this. You’re wonderful, Marinette, really.”

She blushes violently as he takes the bag, digging into the pastries with a smile.

“I don’t usually remember lunch after shoots, so…”

She stares at him in horror. “That’s it,” she declares, “I’m bringing you lunch now. Everyday. No matter what.”

“How much? I’ll pay-”

“No, Adrien, we’re friends. You don’t need to pay me. Maman is always saying how she thinks you need to eat more anyways, so my parents would probably just give you free food if you so much as glanced in the window. I’m just making their dreams come true.”

He laughs, and she takes a moment to appreciate such a carefree look on the busy model’s face.

He’s happy.

That’s good.

---

Cat Boy: u okay bug

Cat Boy: u seemed upset today

 Little Lady: im fine

Little Lady: just

Little Lady: tired

Little Lady: i should probably go now class will start soon

 Cat Boy: okay

Cat Boy: if you say so

 Adrien tries not to let his worry for his partner show as he slips his phone into his pocket and makes his way to Bustier’s class.

The battle was easy - Ladybug didn’t even need her Lucky Charm - but Cataclysm had been a requirement for this particular fight, so he hadn’t had time afterwards to check in with his friend.

He’s never good at focusing when he’s worried.

Nino slings an arm around him as they meet up on their way to class.

“Hey dude, um, I hope you don’t mind sitting with Nette today. She’s pretty wiped out - Al’s said she said somethin’ about a big commission? I dunno’, but we figure the less high up she is, the better, so I’m takin’ her seat today so she can go ground level.”

“Oh that’s fine! Is she okay?”

Nino gestures at the girl as they enter. She’s slumped forward, making her already small form even smaller, and while her sketchbook is out, the page is blank, and her pencil isn’t anywhere to be seen. There’s a to-go cup of coffee in the corner of the desk, and her head rests on her hand, her eyes staring blankly forward, unresponsive.

Adrien winces. “Goodness.”

“Yeah…” Nino shakes his head, then heads towards the girl’s usual seat. “You take care of her, alright?”

Adrien nods, sliding into his usual seat. “Hey, Mari,” he greets softly.

She straightens, blinking a few times before turning to face him with a weak smile. “Hey.”

“You feeling alright?”

She doesn’t get a chance to respond before Ms. Bustier walks in and class starts.

The lesson feels slow. Between Marinette and Ladybug, Adrien has the urge to hug someone and tell them that they’re okay, and that they’re good.

Both girls, at this point. The look in Marinette’s eyes is the same as Ladybug’s when she’s overworking herself to avoid thinking about something. The nights when he sees her patrolling even though she isn’t scheduled and he has to transform to go talk her into resting. The fights where she throws herself at akumas less thoughtfully, more brash. The post-battle interviews where her answers are slightly delayed, her eyes endlessly tired.

So when class is finally over, Adrien puts a gentle hand on her shoulder to keep her from going. Once everyone has filed out, he gives a small, worried smile.

“Are you feeling okay, Marinette?”

“I’m fine.”

“Marinette.”

She hesitates, her eyes straying from his to stare at nothing in particular. “I’m fine, Adrien, really. I’m just… just tired.”

“The coffee probably isn’t helping,” he teases.

“The coffee is my lifeblood.” She smirks, then sighs. “But I’m more than just sleep-tired.”

“Oh.”

She stands, gathering her things. “But thank you. For asking. And for caring.”

“Not a problem.” He hands her her sketchbook. “You deserve it.”

She looks at the sketchbook, then at his smile, and gives a genuine one of her own. “Yeah. Yeah I do.”

---

Author’s Note: Next (and final) chapter will be up sometime next week! I'll try to post weekly one-shots until I have A Shy 'Sparrow' fully written, and then I'll put that on a regular schedule.

Thank you all so much! Have a lovely day and stay safe! 💞

“Ladybug will win! She always will!” Alya shouts defiantly.

 Ladybug shakes herself out of her thoughts.

That’s the past.

It doesn’t matter.

 “Is that so? How can you be so sure?” the akuma sneers.

 She’s fine.

Everything’s fine.

Everything is perfectly fine.

 “Because! She’s Ladybug! She wins! That’s what she does. One day, she’ll beat you and then you’ll see.”

 She stumbles as she lands, catching the attention of her partner. He glances over at her, but she just waves him off sheepishly.

“Zoned out.”

He smiles, and they continue on with their patrol.

 “But what about the other side of her? The girl behind the mask? How can you put your faith in someone you’ve never met? She’s only human, and humans are made to fail. One day, she’ll slip up, and when she does, I’ll be there.”

 A mistake. She zoned out, and she tripped. What if it’d been during an attack? A mistake like that could have cost them their miraculouses, their Kwamis, their very life as they know it.

That akuma - Hawkmoth, actually, because that was most certainly the man himself speaking through his victim - was right.

Ladybug is Marinette, and Marinette is a mess.

She has no place in a job like this. One trip up, and boom! It’s all over.

She doesn’t even realize there are tears trailing down her face until Chat Noir puts a gentle hand on her shoulder.

“Ladybug?” He looks at her, tilting his head to the side just a bit, concerned. She’s wiping furiously at her eyes now, cursing herself for being so stupid as to start crying in Paris.

“I-I-I c-can’t.”

“Can’t what?” he asks softly.

“C-can’t do th-thi-this!” She  throws her hands out, motioning at the city around them. “I-I’m j-just s-some girl! Not a-a-a hero! I’m g-going to m-mess it all up.”

“No you aren’t,” he argues. “You’ve done great! You are a hero.”

“I’m a fraud.”

“No, Ladybug, you aren’t a fraud.” Chat frowns. “Is this about that akuma the other day?”

She sniffles. “Maybe.”

“Hawkmoth was just trying to get under your skin-”

“Well he did!” she shouts. “Because everything he said was true, and I’ve thought the same before!”

Chat pauses, unsure how to proceed. “I don’t think it’s true.”

“You haven’t met me before. The girl under the mask. She’s a mess, Chaton, she never should have been chosen for this. Who is she to have all this trust?”

“I think I see the problem,” he says gently.

“What? Me?” she mutters.

“No.” He hugs her. “You and your civilian self are the same person. Quit pretending they aren’t. Whoever you are, you have achieved everything you have as Ladybug, because you are Ladybug.”

Taking both of her hands in each of his, he holds them at their sides. They stand parallel in silence for sometime, Ladybug’s forehead pressed into his chest, the only sound being her occasional sniffle.

“I’m a disaster. Everyone thinks that Ladybug is the perfect hero, but I’m not. I’m just me.”

“And that’s what makes you such a great hero, Bugaboo. You’re Tikki’s chosen. That means something.”

“It means nothing,” she mutters derisively. “I’m going to mess up. I’ve done it before.”

“And what happened then?”

“Things got worse. Because I’m stupid.”

“No. You still won, because even though you make mistakes, you also fix them.”

“‘s’all ‘m good for anyways.”

“No!”

“Yes!” She steps back, gesturing at herself, somehow looking at herself critically while maintaining eye contact. “Let’s be honest, I wouldn't have done half of what I’ve done if it weren’t for you! Why should I get the credit for what you did?”

“Now, hold on. You always get mad when people write off what I do and credit it to you, so how is it fair to do it to yourself? We achieved all these things as a team. It was both of us, and neither of us deserve to be forgotten or ignored.”

“You were ready,” she argues. “That first day, you fought, and you were ready. I didn’t do anything until Alya shouted at me because you got in trouble. I was scared and stupid. I tried to give up.”

“It was a lot at once, and it’s understandable you were overwhelmed. And look at how far you’ve come! You haven’t given up!”

“Because of you. I couldn’t abandon you, Kitty.”

He shakes his head. “I may have been why you didn’t want to, but you were the one who stepped up and continued to fight. You’re the one who fought hard despite being scared. I was the why, but you were the how.”

She’s not convinced, and he sighs, sitting down and gesturing for her to do the same. When they’re both settled, he takes her hands and looks at her intently. She looks away.

“Ladybug, I just want you to listen to me. You don’t have to look, or respond, just hear me out, okay?”

For a moment, there’s nothing, then she nods.

“You’re an amazing person. Period. But clearly, it’s going to take more than just one conversation to convince you. That’s okay. Most things can’t be set right as quick as your cure.”

“What, so I’m broken?” she snaps, her anger not directed at him.

“No, you’re not broken. There’s nothing about you that needs to be changed, or fixed. You’re wonderful just as you are. I just want you to see it too.” He pulls her into a gentle hug. “We can just talk, okay? Partners support each other, no matter what. Whenever you’re feeling bad like this, just let me know, no matter where or when, and I’ll be there for you. To talk, or listen, whatever you need.”

She frowns. “That’s not fair to you. I can’t just interrupt your day like that.”

“It’s fair if I do the same to you!”

Despite herself, she can’t stop the small huff of amusement (a laugh, Chat would argue), that escapes her at his expression. “Fine. I’ll transform and text you next time. But you have to do the same! I don’t want to be just leeching off your time and giving nothing in return!”

Chat grins. “Silly! You’re no leech, you’re a ladybug.”

She rolls her eyes, sticking out her hand. “Is it a deal?”

He shakes it triumphantly. “It’s a deal.”

---

Author’s Note: I have the next chapter written, and have plans for the last one, so I'll be able to (hopefully) be posting regularly again! I do have school again, so there is that getting in my way schedule-wise.

Regardless, I am back! So I hope to get back into the swing of things and get a regular posting schedule! Stay safe and wear your masks! 💕

A month since Alya posted that picture, and things aren’t going well. The amount of attacks has almost doubled, and Marinette can’t help but feel that Hawkmoth is targeting her.

If he is, it’s working, because she’s been getting worse, fast.

Alya now shows up at the bakery to walk with her to school each day, because no one wants her to faint in the middle of the street. If Alya is absent, then Adrien or Nino will come to get her.

Her parents have been sending her to a doctor for a while now. She was prescribed something a week ago, and it’ll be starting to take effect properly around… today, actually.

She and Alya arrive at school together as usual. What isn’t usual is that for whatever reason, the school’s population is buzzing in excitement about some girl who transferred in.

“Well, she sounds interesting…” Alya remarks, unsure. The stories seem off somehow.

Marinette hums. She’s not sure about this new girl either.

Her classmates are gathered around a desk in the front. Not tightly, just all facing that way and closer than they normally would be.

“...my sprained wrist hasn’t healed properly, because- Oh! Maybe I shouldn’t tell you. Well, I guess you all seem pretty trustworthy,” the girl looks around carefully. She’s dressed in a gray romper with an orange jacket. Her hair is tied into two ponytails in the front. They resemble sausages more than anything.

It’s certainly a… unique look.

“See, I’m actually Sparrow! Chat and I are dating- Oops! We didn’t want that to be public ye-”

“I don’t believe you,” Marinette cuts in. Another wave of dizziness passes over her, and she clutches at Alya gently, swaying.

Crocodile tears come to the girl’s eyes, “H-how c-c-could you say th-that? I work so much for th-this c-c-city, and this i-i-is the th-thanks I get?” Marinette collapses, falling to the floor. Her classmates gasp, and several rush to help her.

“Oh, so now she’s pretending t-to be sick so that y-you’ll all believe her-” New Girl sneers.

Everyone falls silent, processing what the new girl said.

“What,” Adrien snarls. She pales, but attempts to continue.

“W-well, she c-c-clearly is jealous, and is tr-trying to discredit me, and is looking for sympathy p-points by pretending to-”

“Oh, shut it!” Alya snaps, “Mari has been sick for weeks. I have to walk her to school everyday so that she doesn’t collapse in the street, and just because she didn’t believe your frankly outlandish tall tales, you’re saying that she’s faking it?”

“W-well no-”

“Really? Because that’s what it sounded like to me,” Adrien growls.

“I sh-should go. Jag-”

“Just leave.” Nino glares, “You aren’t welcome here.”

The girl makes her escape, and the class turns their full attention on their favorite pigtailed designer.

Max is muttering medical statistics to Rose and Juleka who are doing their best to revive her. Soon enough, she stirs, putting a hand to her head and groaning.

Both girls hug her, and Max sighs in relief.

“Maybe you should head home, Mari…” Alya hugs her.

“No, I’ll just go to the nurse first, if I need to go home, I’ll call Maman or Papa.” Marinette suggests, “You shouldn’t miss class.”

“Alright…”

After everyone wishes her well and she makes her way to the nurse. Of course, then she hears the sounds of an attack.

No break for her, huh?

Hurrying out the door of the school, she ducks into an alley to transform.

“Duusu, Spread My Feathers!”

Instead of the usual warm calming feeling of magic washing over her, it feels like searing fire. Every bone feels like it’s splintering and her muscles tense. She’s stumbling, but that is barely registered amidst the tidal wave of pain she is drowning in. She coughs, choking on nothing as her throat struggles to function.

Her back hits a wall, and she slides to the ground, falling until she’s nothing but a limp body on the ground, spasming occasionally.

She needs to detransform. She needs to detransform right this second.

Just thinking takes immense effort, so talking is out of the question. She’s relieved when she registers the sound of beeping from far, far away.

A voice echoes around her, something blue flying around above her, mumbling about medication.

“Wha’?” Nothing is coming into focus, but at least the pain is fading, even if she feels sore and utterly exhausted,

“I- I didn’t want to say anything, because it wasn’t completely certain to happen, but often, magic doesn’t mix well with medicine…” the blue thing chirps.

Kwami, she can barely understand French words, let alone identify… anything.

“Wha’?” Everything is swimming again, she still can’t move properly.

The blue thing rushes towards her - hiding, she thinks - as something dark lands in the alley.

“Good Kwami, what happened to you Ma- Miss?”

The dark thing crouches near her, and she does her best to repeat the blue thing’s - Duusu’s - words.

“...medzz...bad..reacshhun…” she manages.

“You had a bad reaction to your medication.” He - Chat Noir - repeats, looking for clarification.

She nods almost imperceptibly, trying to move upright but instead finds that her arms give out and she returns to the ground.

“I can take you home.” Almost as an afterthought, he adds, “Uh, where do you live?”

Marinette does her best to mumble ‘bakery’ and hopes she gets the message across properly. She’s entirely spent.

Chat Noir picks her up as gently as possible, and hurries to get her home without jostling her too much. He hands her off to her parents, doing his best to explain what she’d told him.

They nod, and her Papa takes her to bed while Maman calls the doctor. It doesn’t take long for her to give in to the exhaustion, falling into a restless sleep.

She wakes up a few hours later, feeling weak and tired.

“Duusu?” She croaks. The Kwami immediately flies up to her, looking relieved that she’s awake.

“Marinette! How are you feeling?” She’s uncharacteristically uncomposed, flitting around distractedly looking over her holder.

“Just… really tired. My head hurts, I’m kind of sore…?” She holds her head, staring off in space until something occurs to her. “The akuma! I can’t leave Chat alone!”

She stands quickly trying to get to her balcony, only to fall back onto her bed, feeling shaky.

“Marinette, that was hours ago. You aren’t well.”

“What happened?” She can’t really remember anything past transforming.

“It- I’m sorry. The miraculous uses some of your energy to transform, usually it wouldn’t be noticable, but… it’s broken. It’s trying to use your energy to heal itself, but that’s not going to work. The medication blocked that, but by transforming, you forcibly went against that… so it didn’t end well. My last chosen-” Duusu’s voice cracks, and she tears up, “Oh, Emilie, my poor little peachick…”

She shakes herself out of her mind after a moment, “Since you are younger, there was a chance that the medication wouldn’t have done anything, maybe even help, so I didn’t want to worry you…”

Marinette sighs. “It’s alright Duusu, it’s not your fault the brooch is cracked. Though, maybe I should be trying to fix it. How can I do that?”

Duusu pauses to think. This girl has proven to be very capable, and is certainly responsible. She’s ready to know about the Guardian.

“There’s a Guardian of the miraculous. They are responsible for taking care of and protecting the miraculouses. He is in Paris, that much I am sure of. He is the one who gave Chat Noir his miraculous, and he is in possession of Tikki. Together, they would be able to fix it.”

“Great!” Marinette cheers, “So just tell Chat I need to see the guardian?”

“...no. The Guardian is meant to stay a secret and it’s possible that Chat does not even know of their existence. If you were to out them, it would not look good for you. If Chat does know, he’s probably doing his best to protect him as well, given Hawkmoth’s goal. Telling him that you have to meet with the Guardian and Tikki? It wouldn’t be a good look.”

“Especially after I missed an attack…”

Duusu nods regretfully.

“Can I make sentimonsters for searching? To try and track him down?”

“I suppose. Depending on which Kwami they are the holder of it may not be as effective, but there’s no way of telling.”

---

The peahen heroine is transformed, out on patrol. Her sentimonster already healed the minimal damage from the attack. She’d rested enough earlier that she feels comfortable making another.

Touching another amok to her brooch, she allows the sentimonster to take shape. A dark crow forms in front of her, waiting for instruction.

She holds her hands out to let it rest. “Find the Guardian. Find Tikki. That’s all. Do your best,” she whispers, kissing its forehead and letting it fly away.

A Cat hero in the shadows hears the words and frowns.

That’s not right.

---

Author’s Note: Crows are predators to turtles, you know.

Did I come up with some magical nonsense as to why Marinette can't use medication for the sake of angst? Yes. Yes I did.

This story might be moving faster than you were expecting, but I never intended for it to be as long as With Time. I hope you enjoy it nonetheless!