Fic for Food
Send me proof of donation to a food bank and a prompt and I will write 100 words for every dollar donated

if i look back, i am lost

gracie abrams
occasionally subtle
Claire Keane
Cosmic Funnies

Andulka
TMBGareOK. The Official They Might Be Giants tumblr

Kiana Khansmith
taylor price
noise dept.
macklin celebrini has autism
Mike Driver
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
Xuebing Du

blake kathryn
🩵 avery cochrane 🩵

tannertan36

seen from Mexico
seen from United Kingdom

seen from Bangladesh

seen from United Kingdom
seen from Slovakia
seen from Russia

seen from Germany
seen from Russia

seen from Switzerland

seen from Belgium
seen from Indonesia

seen from United States

seen from Venezuela
seen from Venezuela
seen from Italy
seen from United States
seen from Türkiye
seen from Morocco
seen from India
seen from Türkiye
@pacificrim-au
Fic for Food
Send me proof of donation to a food bank and a prompt and I will write 100 words for every dollar donated

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Everybody Lives Nobody Dies AU
For Stacker’s 50th birthday Herc organizes a little reunion of people from the shatterdome
They rent a big house with a HUGE kitchen (like so) and invite everyone to come and make dinner together
All the kids play in the backyard together while the adults stand in the kitchen cooking and chatting and teasing each other
Mako makes like a really incredible stew that everyone keeps “checking” when they walk by because it’s so good
Raleigh bakes bread to go with the stew
Tendo bakes a cake (and argues with Raleigh about oven space, settling the disagreement with Rock Paper Scissors)
Alison is mixing cocktails and making sure there’s always enough coffee
Chuck makes potatoes (he’s not a great cook but potatoes he can handle)
Hermann and Newt couldn’t agree if green beans or brussel sprouts so they’re having a competition and taking it very seriously (and being egged on by the whole crew)
Nate is making salad with homemade dressing and it’s not great but he tried
Jake is making ice cream to go with Tendo’s cake
Stacker and Herc make a roast bird on the grill they didn’t tell anyone would exist because they didn’t want to fight over the space
Alexis and Sasha being a a spread of different pickled fish and cured meats and some cheeses for everyone to snack on
Cheung, Hu, and Jin make steamed crabs
When everything’s done it’s is spread over two huge tables that everyone sits at together and sit at the table for hours
There’s a lively debate between Mako, Jake, and Chuck over who was supposed to get the candles because none of them did
Tendo stays quiet but he thinks it might have been his job to bring the candles
At least 5 different versions of happy birthday are sung over top of each other when it’s time for Stacker to blow out the one display candle that was in the rental
Regency au
Hermann is a novelist who write loves stories a-la Jane Austen
Newt is his biggest fan
So newt writes him a letter and so begins the passionate and fascinating exchange and they’re both a little bit in love
Meanwhile newt and hermann meet in person at a academic meeting and Hate each other
Hermann writes a new book and it’s about a man and woman who find each other and fall in love over long distances and write letters and then meet in person and get married
Newt loves the new book and is too scared to ask but he thinks it might maybe be about him
They agree to meet in London to finally meet the man they’re in love with
When they see each other they both shout “YOU!” And thy fight but as thy do they realize that they love fighting together and it’s fun
And then they live happily ever after
shout out to the discord chat for this one
4 horsepeople of wholesomeness AU, first and foremost time isn’t real so it’s happening when it happens do not at me about airdates
hermann teaches math on public access in the style and vibe of bob ross (happy little integers and beating the devil out of the chalkboard eraser)...he doesn’t usually dress Like That with the deep shirt but his producer Vanessa makes him
newt does a show in the vein of the crocodile hunter and goes around showing animals and trying to pet things that maybe don’t want to be pet.
stacker does a show called ‘mr pentecosts neighborhood’ complete with a puppet show and him changing out of a suit jacket and into a sweater while singing
mako works behind the scenes of shows building and designing puppets for pretty much every beloved puppet show
newt still has to go into the studio office pretty often and he sees hermann but hermann is always buttoned up so he doesn’t even recognize him as the guy on the posters until a holiday party at the end of the year and everyones trying to tell hermann how much he’s made learning math easy and fun for their kids and newt’s like THATS YOU??
no kaiju AU where Newt invents time travel to prove that ancient aliens are fake to his roommate and Hermann is the physist who helps him actually work out the math for it

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Chef!Newt
Newt is a chef that teaches classes sometimes
hermann is taking cooking classes in an attempt to “get more hobbies” and broaden his horizons (also because the man cannot cook)
newt is immediately taken with he stuffy guy who is trying really hard in the class and looks so cute when he frowns at the onion he’s cutting. hermann is immediately taken by his teacher and all the tattoos that run down his arms
Vanessa, a friend that is taking the class with him, keeps telling him to ask Newt to come help him so that they have more time to flirt, Hermann refuses because then Newt won’t like him because he doesn’t know how to do anything
On the other side of the class there is someone who does ask for help to try to get more time to flirt with Newt. Newt is not smitten with her even though Hermann thinks he is, Vanessa continues to bang her head into the wall because she can’t make her brother in law see sense.
Newt is watching over Hermann’s shoulder one day and Hermann says “I’m much better at this when you aren’t staring over my shoulder.”
Newt: Oh really
Hermann: yes. At home my cooking is much better than this
Newt: i’d like to see that
Hermann: okay
they’re both in shock because like did Hermann just ask Newt to come over for a date and Newt’s like “cool I will talk to you about it after class maybe anyway I have to go Raleigh’s onions are burning”. Cut to Raleigh who is still chopping onions and has nothing in his pan.
Newt comes over to Hermann’s apartment for lunch (he has dinner service that night) and Hermann cooks for him and they talk and flirt much later than Newt planned so he has to rush off to the restaurant for dinner service. Newt tells Hermann to come by the restaurant and he’ll make him something good if he wants
Hermann does decide to go by and he tells the waitress that Newt said to tell her that he was Hermann. She takes the menu back, “yes he said you might come in. He says hes decided on a menu if that’s okay with you” hermann agrees
Newt sends out a ton of food all of it delicious and Newt comes out to say hi with dessert
A few months later Newt is at hermann’s apartment, half asleep at the counter while Hermann cooks when he says I love you for the first time
Hermann yells at him not to say those things or he’ll get distracted and will burn the food
No kaiju and instead its a period piece:
Newt and Hermann meet in the 60s while working at the same university
they’re both single so they move in together despite the fact that they hate each other (and maybe a little bit of the hate they have for each other is the fact that they’re attracted to each other and its not exactly the safest thing to be attracted to another man)
But eventually everything settles and they become best friends who live together and both get tenure at the university and they buy a house together because it’s just easier to do it together.
cut to the 00s and they’re almost 70 they are approached by one of the LGBT studies students who’s doing their dissertation on queer couples who lived together for years as “friends” because it wasn’t safe to be out
but both Newt and Hermann are like you don’t seem to understand we really are just friends and the student’s like oh sorry didn’t mean to assume and they're both like nah don’t worry about it.
a few days later Newt and Hermann are having sunday breakfast together (a tradition) and Newt’s like I think we should still do that interview with that kid...we have a lot to say and i’ve been in love with you the whole time and even though we were never a couple there were times when we got close and just...i think we should do it
and hermann’s like yes...yes i think we should and we could add the perspective of what it’s like to hide feelings for decades even though they are apparently reciprocated because you know that with one wrong move you could lose everything
and then they kiss
and they’re old gays who live happily ever after
Flight Attendant!Newt Lawyer!Hermann
shout out to the amazing and talented @three-black-cats who is the co-creator of this AU
Hermann is a fancy business lawyer who works for Lars. They’re so fancy that Lars regularly charters a plane to fly Hermann and other employees around the European continent.
Newt works as a flight attendant for the charter and they see each other all the time and of course, they fall in love
But Hermann ends up quitting his job and so he doesn’t fly around on private jets anymore (OH NO)
Months later they run into each other in an airport and And Newts like “long time no see” and Hermann just blurts out “I work at a nonprofit now” and newts like “what?”
and Hermann’s just like “you said I could do good and that you didn’t think I was a bad person just because of my work and I wanted to be that person so that’s why I quit my dad’s firm and now I work against companies like my dads. Also, I lost the napkin you gave me with your phone number and I was too embarrassed to ask again so that’s why I never called…”
And Newts still a little wary because his heart was shattered when Hermann just disappeared from the face of the earth but he asks if Hermann wants to get dinner
And Hermann’s like “I can make dinner for us you can stay at my place you always said how much you hate hotels oh no was that too forward I’m sorry”
And newts like “nah go on be as forward as you want I’m at the point where I was down to have a fling with you in a shitty hotel room so a homecooked meal? We can do whatever you want”
After dinner, they’re making out of the couch but Hermann’s taking it slow and every time Newt gets excited Hermann slows him down and Newt’s like dude if you don’t want to do this we don’t have to
Hermann’s just like “I’m savoring the moment you made it clear it would be a one-time thing so I want to take my time”
And Newt’s like “you would want more than a one-time thing? Like you’d want a thing with…emotions?” Only for Hermann to laugh and say “of course why would I not?”
Newt gets a little teary-eyed because people don’t usually want all of him, usually just the sexy parts and he’s quiet for a long time until Hermann’s like what happened and Newt’s just like “…this has never happened before I’m trying to figure out how to respond”
And Hermann just kisses him softly and tells him to take all the time in the world Hermann will wait for him
They don’t have sex that night and just cuddle on the couch watching a scary movie (they’re both pretending to be scared just so they can hold each other)
In the morning Hermann drives him to the airport and Newt’s like “I have a few days off coming up maybe I could come stay for a while shit that was too much wasn’t it?”
And Hermann just takes his hand and tells him that he’d like nothing more than to have Newt come stay for as long as he likes
As soon as Newt was out of earshot after dropping him off at the airport Hermann calls Karla and is like “Karla you will not believe the day i’ve had” “it’s seven in the morning what did you meet up with that guy from the charter that you haven’t stopped mooning over since you quite working for dad?” “actually yes” “WHAT?”
On that flight, Newt can’t stop smiling because he’s so happy and he tells Catlin who is the pilot all about his night and will not shut up about how great Hermann is
Thief!Newt
The kaiju still come but Newt isn’t a biologist, he’s a thief
He reads Hermann’s papers and pretends to be some well respected biologist guy and writes to Hermann because he still gets the stuff but he got too bored in school to actually get 6 phds
He and hermann have their letter exchange but on the day they meet Newt tries to explain to hermann that he lied and hermann vows to never forgive him
Fast forward to the PPDC struggling to keep the jaeger program a float and then one day Stacker gets a case of 2 million dollars cash just delivered to his office
Pentecost knows better than to look a gift horse in the mouth and just accepts it, spends it, and doesn’t give it any more thought to where it came from
Except the money keeps coming usually to Stacker but sometimes hermann is the one who gets it. When hermann gets it he always marches down to Pentecost’s office with it tucked under his arm looking furious but refusing to tell Stacker if he knows anything more
The boxes of money that go to Hermann also come with critiques of anything that hermann has published since the last box. Hermann knows exactly who they’re from
After they save the day (without newt Idk how but they do) hermann writes a letter to the address he always had for newt which turned out to be Jacobs house and says they need to meet in person again newt accepts
They meet up again and hermann ends up telling newt all about how the money was spent and then he asks where it was that newt got the money and Newts like I’m kinda a bank robber and a good one at that and Hermann just laughs until his chest hurts because of course the money that was make or break for the Shatterdome some days came from Hermann’s ex-pen-pal who was a bank robber
Newt, Hermann, Tendo, Mako, and the Wei Tang triplets, (and sometimes Chuck not that he’d ever admit it) play RP games every once in a while
The games are always short one pager types since there’s not a lot of time for complicated campaigns
It started as a way to entertain Mako when she was a kid when she got bored of following Stacker around and needed to talk to people that weren’t her dad
Tendo usually DMs. But if someone else wants to their always welcome to take the reigns. Except Hermann who has been banned for life from DMing
Newt always tries to romance Hermann’s characters but the rules forbid any actual kissing or innuendo or even eluding to sexy times
Hermann has been proposed to five times in game (four by Newt and once by Jin who thought it’d make Newt do the offended squawk thing he does (he was right))
It was how Mako learned to speak Mandarin fluently and picked up German swearing

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The precursors weren’t forcing newt to avoid Hermann, the we’re constantly trying to get them together
Newt was using what power he did have to keep them apart because he knew the precursors wanted to use Hermann
“you can finally meet Alice” wasn’t a cry for help, it was Newt losing because he had spent a decade making sure that hermann NEVER met Alice
Groundhog Day Newmann AU
In an attempt to avert Uprising Hermann figures out how to send his consciousness back in time
But it doesn’t 100% work and instead he ends up just remembering that he already lived that day and then 2035 Hermann makes him keep reliving it until he gets it right aka Groundhog Day-ing himself
2035 Hermann picks the day because it’s the day he got a splitting headache and he stopped feeling Newt at all, aka he’s pretty sure the day Newt finally drifted with Alice
Groundhog Day Hermann finally figures out that he has to stop Newt from doing something stupid (he doesn’t know what) and keep him from getting that awful headache
His solution is to call Newt and distract him from whatever stupid thing he’s doing and he thinks the danger has passed
But instead he gets locked in Groundhog Day again until he goes and flys to where Newt is, discovers Alice and stops the whole thing before it starts
2035 Hermann wakes up and he’s in bed with his husband that never became a puppet for a genocidal alien race and he kisses Newt good morning but immediately gets out of bed and Newts like why
But Hermann goes and he forces himself to Groundhog Day himself (they figured out what had happened sometime around their second anniversary) to maintain the timeline
He still feels relieved when he goes back into the bedroom and finds Newt still sleeping (even though it’s close to noon)
Mr & Mrs Smith AU
Newt works at a spy organization with Tendo, Herc and Chuck
Hermann works at a different spy organization with Pentecost, Mako, and Raleigh
Newt and Hermann are married and love each other very much. Neither knows the other is a spy
They are both sent on a mission to retrieve the same thing
Chaos ensues
Hermann and Karla own a coffeeshop together (Hermann makes the pastries and Karla is in charge of the coffee because Hermann could mess up drip)
Their shop is right across from a bar where Newt works with Tendo and Vanessa
Newt always comes in right as the coffeeshop is closing because his shift is starting and he buys a coffee and whatever is left in the pastry cake
Hermann maintains that this is obnoxious because they’re closing but Karla doesn’t care because it’s one less thing she has to put in the day-olds and hermann gets grumpy if there’s too much in that part of the case and Hermann’s not there at night most of the time so he doesn’t get a vote
Newt’s order starts getting bigger because the other people at the bar have tried his coffee and stolen part of his scone and they are addicted so he just grabs everyone something before he goes
One night Hermann is filling in for Karla on the closing shift and decides to just bake what he can that night to give him a few more minutes of sleep in the morning. (He’s usually there by 3:30 or 4 to bake but closing and then being up that early would be murder)
Newt comes in for his order and sees Herm and is like dude you’re the brother who bakes this stuff you’re the best I could live off your cinnamon rolls
And hermann pretends not to be flattered because he’s hermann and instead talks about how he’s glad they’re properly appreciated because he’ll be there half the night because Karla has a date
And Newt is like bummer but give me my coffee it’s a little messed up and Newt says something just as a joke “I get why Karla makes you stay in the back. Your baristaing sucks” but it hurts Herms feelings anyway because he’s sensitive and he snaps at Newt
Naturally Newt goes and complains to Tendo (Vanessa’s on a date) about it and Tendos like try not being a dick
So Newt takes a peace offering of Nachos which is really the only good thing they make at the bar to hermann on his brake because true to his word hermann is still there baking for the next day
They eat nachos while cookies bake in the oven
John Wick!AU
Stacker is part of the assassin council thing
Raleigh got out after his brother died? But then someone killed his dog (a golden retriever that was old and that the Beckets had gotten as a puppy when they were kids
Mako does her own wet work but helps out Raleigh on his mission for revenge because it’s kinda fun
Hermann is the guy at the front fest at the hotel
Newt also works at the hotel but he’s more the guy from the second movie that give John wick all the guns and the fancy suit
Herc is an old assassin who is trying to hide from his child (chuck) that they work in the same organization.
Chuck became an assassin because he just kinda fell into it (some of the other people in the organization found out about Hercs kid and brought him in. Herc put a very pretty hit out on the person who did it)

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Jake and Nate were insperabile as kids. They were best friends and went to the same schools. Until Jake was sent away to a boarding school after he kept getting into trouble (they’d get into trouble together but Jake always took the blame)
But once Jake is gone he never text he never emails. It’s just the occasional like on Instagram that even lets Nate know he’s alive.
Nate’s still mad about it when they’re forced to share a dorm room during their first year of university
Writers Hermann and Newt have a very public feud going on. They fight on Twitter, in instagram comments, tumblr, YouTube, Pinterest. They fight in person when they’re at the same conventions (which both are sci-fi writers so really if one is invited so is the other). They even fight on skype during their brainstorming and writing sessions once a week that they both plan their lives around