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only accepting grand gestures. i’m bored, make me feel something.

I wish I was a female tiger because then if I was talking to someone and I was getting off topic I could say “but I tigress,” and then kill and eat them because I am a tiger

Dealing with burnout is sooooooooooooooo easy all you need to do is operate at 40% indefinitely and be kind of mad at yourself the whole time.

my sexual fantasy is to have someone notice my absence and wonder about me

I used to tell myself, ‘Maybe they’re going through something.’ But then I realized that I was too, and I never treated anyone that way.

In 21st century America, there was a pervasive superstition that rats could force people to do their bidding simply by grabbing ahold of their hair. It was often common courtesy to remove your hat, either as a greeting or when entering another's homes, to show them that you are not being possessed by a rat, and can be trusted to behave.

sorry i can't make it. i have to watch my show that aired twenty years ago

the mortifying ordeal of being earnest

guy who has a mental health condition that comes and goes: i’m cured this time actually i can feel it

same guy when they start having symptoms again: what the fuck is happening and why

"do it scared" is valuable advice but it'd also be SIIIICK and AWESOME if it stopped being scary at some point. any point